Witness Protection
by CharmedRumbelle
Summary: AU: Belle French is the sole witness to a murder and her testimony could bring down an entire crime syndicate. She is placed in the Witness Protection Program, her new job being the housekeeper to a reclusive billionaire named Ian Gold, a private, condescending man with a mysterious past. Gold closed himself off to everyone years ago - but he's never met anyone like Belle French.
1. Chapter 1

_This little plot bunny came to be a couple of days ago - really excited about it, hope you enjoy it!_

_I do not own 'Once Upon a Time.'_

**_Chapter 1_**

Belle French sat in a back room in a small precinct office of the New York Police Department. She had been on her lunch break when it happened. Her father always warned her of taking short cuts through alleyways but she figured it was during the day, the streets were busy – what could possibly happen?

She was halfway through the alley when she heard voices: a man and a woman arguing. She hid behind a trash bin, too afraid to even move. She could hear every word they were saying. The man and woman stepped out into the main alleyway and she saw them clearly. The woman had a gun – she pulled it out and shot the man, and he fell to the ground. Startled, Belle stumbled and made a noise. The woman turned around, and she locked eyes with Belle. And Belle ran. To Belle's surprise, the woman didn't chase her. But Belle knew that the woman recognized her immediately.

Maurice French moved himself and his daughter Belle to New York when Belle was fifteen years old. He was a successful business mogul in Melbourne, Australia, and wanted to expand his business, and knew that the best way to do that was to move to the states. He chose to settle in New York with Belle. He was the owner and CEO of French's, a large department store that had locations throughout the globe. He had hoped that Belle would take some interest in his business, and when she was sixteen she started working at his offices. Belle, however, had other aspirations. She enjoyed reading and studying and wanted to go to school and study, of all things, library science. Maurice – Moe to his friends and family – wasn't happy with the prospect of his daughter earning the meager living of a librarian. She was an heiress – she was certainly meant for better things than that. But Belle had her own mind, which Moe realized very early on. Able to afford whatever she desired, Belle was able to obtain her Bachelor and Masters degrees in Library Science. She worked at the New York Public Library and was one of the administrators at their largest branch in Manhattan.

The petite blonde looked quite a bit younger than her thirty years of age, and would often still get recognized on the streets of New York. During her late teens, she did a bit of modeling for the ads and commercials for her father's store. Several of those ads made their way to Times Square, and Belle's face was seen on billboards throughout the city. She was "The Face of French's" as the media called her. Belle was a stunningly beautiful young lady, but she had no aspirations for modeling or fame or any of that. She only did the ads as a favor to her father. She often regretted doing so, because it was a legacy that had become difficult to escape. And this legacy was one that she regretted as she met the gaze of the murderous woman.

All she had wanted was a quick bite to eat and a cup of coffee before returning to work for the day. And now she was trapped in a police station. After witnessing the shooting, Belle stopped the first police officer she could find, and was taken to the nearest precinct. She was asked to look through several books of mug shots to identify the woman, and was stunned to find the woman's picture among them. The moment she identified the woman she saw in the alley, she was whisked into a back room. The room had no windows and only a small light. They took her purse and there was no telephone or any means of communication in the room. She was told to wait, and someone would be in to talk to her. She waited for what seemed like hours until finally someone entered.

"Hi – I'm David Nolan, I'm with the Federal Bureau of Investigation." the man said to Belle.

"The FBI? What's going on?" Belle asked nervously. David sat down and motioned for Belle to do the same.

"The woman that you identified – had you ever seen her before today?" David asked.

"No. Never." Belle said. "Who is she?"

"Regina Mills." David said. "We've been trying to get her for years. She heads an organized crime syndicate here in New York, and we suspect she has locations in Boston, Philadelphia, and possibly D.C. Problem is we have no proof of criminal activity. Until now. You're positive that she saw you?"

"Yes. She saw me. I'd say she recognized me too from the look on her face." Belle said.

"Right – the face of French's, I remember that ad." David said. "Miss French – are you willing to testify, in court, to what you heard Regina Mills say, and that you saw her kill Graham Humbert?"

"Is that the man's name?" Belle asked.

"He was a fed. He was working undercover for Regina for the past three months, was coming close to getting evidence of RICO violations, and I think she caught on. He was a good man." David said. "Your testimony can help us put her away. But if she saw you – you could be in danger. We do have a means to protect you though. Have you ever heard of the Witness Protection Program?"

"You mean – I have to start a new life somewhere? What about my family, my friends, my job?" Belle asked.

"Unfortunately – they can't contact you and you can't contact them. Miss French, once Regina is brought to trial and her entire syndicate is brought down, you can return to your life." David said.

"But if you catch her, then why -"

"Unfortunately, Miss French – based on what Agent Humbert reported before he died, Regina Mills isn't the ringleader of this syndicate as we originally thought. There's someone else – and he was close to finding out who that someone was. Too close, apparently. So even if we got Regina – your life would still be in danger. As would your family, friends – anyone close to you." David said.

"How long will it take?" Belle asked.

"We already have another agent on it. Two of them, actually. It could be months or – years." Belle remained quiet for a moment. "Miss French – this crime syndicate has been on our radar for over a decade. They're very smart, and they're very careful. You're the first person, ever, to witness a crime in action that's actually survived. We need your help. People have died, Miss French. Innocent people – too many to even count." David told her.

"Can I at least say goodbye to my father?" Belle asked.

"We can let him know that you're safe, but that's it. I'm sorry." David said. "If you were married or had underage children there is precedent for them to be protected along with you, but – well that's not the case."

"Well I don't really have much of a choice, do I?" Belle asked. "So now what?"

"Well – one of our agents will be here in a bit to get you moved and settled once the arrangements are finalized. You'll get a new name, new job, new look – we'll probably have to have your hair dyed a darker color, you're too recognizable with the blonde hair. We've got a secure hotel room to take you to for now until all of the details are set. Are you ready to go?" David asked.

"I suppose I have to be." Belle said. At that moment, she really wished she had brought her lunch from home that day.

* * *

Belle sat bored out of her mind for nearly two days in the hotel room, which was not at all up to the standard she was used to. She was used to four and five star accommodations. This hotel was sub-par at best, the television had five channels and nothing worth watching. She wasn't permitted to have a phone, a computer, or any form of contact with the outside world, other than the girl who came into the room the day before to dye her hair brown and take some photos, presumably for her new ID. Detective Nolan was there every day as well – he was nice enough and would bring her meals to her, and he even managed to wrangle a few books for her to read, but being an avid reader she poured through those in no time. Finally, after growing quite impatient, David knocked on her door and appeared with another woman. Belle let them in.

"Belle, this is Emma Swan. She's one of the agents assigned to the case, and she's going to get you settled in your new life. She's one of our best – you're in good hands." David said. "Good luck, and hopefully this won't be for long."

"Oh it won't be, not if I have anything to say about it." Emma replied. David left, and Emma sat down on a chair. "So – you're an heiress, huh?"

"Something like that." Belle replied. "I don't have to worry about things, if that's what you mean, my father is there for me when I need him. Has anyone contacted him yet?"

"He got a message. Can't give you any more detail, sorry." Emma said.

"What about my job?" Belle asked.

"It's taken care of. That's all you need to know." Emma replied. "Listen, I'm really sorry about this – I know this sucks, and it's not your fault, you were in the wrong place at the wrong time. But it'll be worth it. These are bad people. You're doing a good thing – you're really being a hero." Emma had been carrying an envelope and she handed it to Belle. "This has all of the details of your new identity. Give it a look." Belle opened the envelope. She glanced at it and made a face.

"Lacey Woods? THAT'S my new name? Who came up with that?" Belle asked.

"Someone in the department. Get used to it, that's what you'll be using from here on." Emma said.

"It sounds like the name you'd give a prostitute. That's – not my new job, is it?" Belle asked. Emma laughed.

"No. No, we needed to get you settled somewhere that's a bit – remote. Even with the dark hair you might still be recognized by some. It was pretty tricky but – I called in a favor and got you set up in a pretty decent setting. I've got a private plane ready to leave in two hours – let's go." Emma said.

"Where are we going?" Belle asked.

"A little town in Maine called Storybrooke." Emma replied.

* * *

Emma drove the car down a long, seemingly deserted road until they finally reached what appeared to be a large estate guarded by golden gates. Emma drove up to the intercom and entered some numbers, and the gates opened, then closed as she pulled the car in. "What is this place?" Belle asked curiously.

"Your new home." Emma said. Belle looked around in awe. The grounds were a shambles – nothing had been kept up but she could tell it was once beautiful.

"It's not haunted, is it?" Belle asked.

"Depends on your definition of haunted." Emma said. "It'll be fine." After driving down an endless driveway, they finally reached the estate. It was huge – a gothic castle, in the middle of Maine. And it was pink.

"A pink castle?" Belle asked.

"Salmon. Don't call it pink, he'll have a fit." Emma said.

"He? Who's he?" Belle asked.

"The guy who lives here. Aka your new boss." Emma said as they reached the front door. "I bought some things for you, they've already been delivered to the house." Emma told her as they got out of the car and approached the front door. Emma knocked twice.

"Dracula's not going to answer, is he?" Belle asked.

"Pretty close." Emma replied. The door opened and Emma and Belle stepped inside.

"Miss Swan. Always a pleasure." the man with the Scottish brogue said. He was a short man, with long hair. He wore a very expensive suit and held a cane with a golden handle in his right hand.

"Right. Sure it is." Emma said.

"I believe this favor makes my debt to you complete." he said.

"For now." Emma replied. The man looked Belle up and down.

"I suppose she'll do." he said, as Belle eyed him nervously. Emma took something out of her pocket and handed it to Belle.

"This is a pre-programmed phone. It can only be used to contact me and no one else. Just dial zero and it reaches me directly. Call me if you have any problems or if you need anything. Mr. Gold here will take care of the rest. He knows everything – all the details of your – situation. He'll help you get settled. I'll check in on you periodically. I have to go – take care." Emma said.

"Um – wait, I just -" Belle began, but Emma quickly darted out the door. Belle stood in the foyer of the big house, looking around nervously. "So um - Mr. Gold, she said? That's your name?" Belle asked nervously.

"Yes." he replied.

"Do you um – have a first name?" she asked.

"I do." Gold replied.

"Would you like to tell me what it is?" Belle asked.

"Not particularly." Gold replied. "Are you going to stand there and gawk all day or should we get you settled then?"

"Okay." Belle said. "So um – I work for you then? What do you do?"

"I'm a businessman." Gold replied.

"What kind of business?" Belle asked.

"Mine." Gold replied curtly.

"Well, if I'm going to be your assistant I would think I should know some of the details." Belle said.

"You're not my assistant, dearie." Gold said. "Would you like to see your room?"

"Oh – okay." Belle said, becoming very uncomfortable. Belle looked up in awe at the winding staircase – well, if she had to live with this rude man, at least she'd be in a nice place. But Gold didn't head for the staircase. He instead led her through the kitchen and to a door that led downstairs. Belle followed him as he limped down the staircase. "The basement?! I have to stay in the BASEMENT?!" Belle shouted angrily.

"What did you expect, that you'd come here and be queen of the castle?" Gold asked.

"No but – princess, at least." Belle said.

"Well, I'm sorry to disappoint you – Princess." Gold said in a cutting tone of voice. "You have all that you need down here – bed, living quarters, your own private bath, and full use of the kitchen."

"But this – this is a SERVANT'S quarters!" Belle exclaimed.

"Exactly." Gold said. "There are several uniforms in the closet, one of them should fit you fine."

"Uniforms? I'm sorry, what are you talking about?" Belle asked.

"Miss Swan didn't fill you in? Well, let me enlighten you. My former housekeeper, Miss Potts, decided to retire last month, and I needed a replacement. I owed Miss Swan a favor, and she asked me to take you on. So here you are." Gold said.

"I – I'm your MAID?" Belle asked.

"You will clean the entire estate, dust, vacuum, that sort of thing. You will also do my laundry - except for my suits, those are to be taken to the cleaners. I have a car for you and you will go into town once a week for grocery shopping and to the cleaners. You will receive a fair stipend for your own expenses and you have Tuesdays off to do as you like as long as it is within the city limits of Storybrooke, you are not to leave for your own safety. Oh, and you will do my cooking. Mrs. Potts left her recipe book in the kitchen with a list of my preferences. I work from home so you will not bother me during business hours. In fact – I prefer that you not bother me at all."

"So you want me to clean and cook for you? THAT'S my new job?" Belle asked. "I have a Masters Degree! I'm not a damned servant!"

"No, I'm sure that, pampered little princess that you are, you've never had to do any of these things. It's not rocket science, dearie, if you managed college you can manage to operate a few items of machinery. Any idiot can dust and run a vacuum and as for cooking – well I suppose you'll learn as you go. I'll have a caterer on stand-by for the first week just in case though." Gold said.

"I know how to cook." Belle retorted angrily.

"Wonderful. Shouldn't be a problem then. I expect my breakfast at 7:30 sharp, set the alarm early enough so that it's ready. I do have my meals catered on Tuesdays in case you were wondering, I don't bother with you on your day off." Gold said. "By the way – do you prefer that I call you Lacey, or Miss Woods?"

"My name is Belle." she replied.

"Not anymore." Gold said. "How about I just call you Princess? It seems to suit you." he said, spitting the words at her. "Seven thirty, Princess. Not a minute later. Good evening then." Gold ambled up the stairs. Belle walked over to the closet and opened it – she found several maid uniforms. She took one out and looked at it, then threw it onto the ground. She jumped on the bed face down and started to cry. She didn't want to be here. She wanted to be back in New York at the library, and with her father and her friends. And this Mr. Gold – he was awful. He was rude, condescending, hateful – he was a beast. And as far as she knew, she could be stuck here with him forever.

* * *

_Thoughts and feedback is greatly appreciated! Thanks for reading!_


	2. Chapter 2

_Wow, already more positive feedback than I expected for this story! Don't expect quick updates like this all the time - I'm just on a roll today. :)_

_I do not own 'Once Upon a Time.'_

**_Chapter 2_**

The next morning, Belle's alarm went off at 5:30 a.m. She didn't want to be late with Mr. Gold's breakfast; he didn't seem like the type that would tolerate that sort of thing. After much crying over her situation the night prior, she resigned herself to accept it. After all, it might seem like it was going to be forever, but she knew it wouldn't be. And as Emma told her – she was being a hero. She had read so many stories about heroics over the years; but she never thought she'd be one herself. For that alone, she supposed she could tolerate this miserable man, Mr. Whatever-his-name-is Gold. She showered and dressed in one of the maid uniforms – she chose the yellow one for that day, as they came in multiple colors, something that surprised her given that the rest of the castle was so – dark. Although the outside WAS pink – er, salmon as Emma had corrected her. For a man as mysterious as Mr. Gold, at least he had a bit of color in his life, however limited.

Belle glanced through the notes that his former housekeeper left. They were very detailed, with notes on everything from where the cleaning supplies were located to how Mr. Gold took his tea and coffee. She also left a precise list of what to purchase on her shopping runs. Belle may have been brought up in luxury but she was fully capable of taking care of herself. She had managed since she moved out of her father's house twelve years prior. Perhaps this wouldn't be so bad after all.

Mr. Gold was waiting at the dining room table at 7:30 a.m. sharp when Belle entered with his breakfast. She set it down in front of him, and he looked it over. "Well this looks fine, Princess."

"Be right back with the coffee." Belle said, and she went back into the kitchen and got the coffee pot. She poured it into his coffee cup, then left the room. Belle came back a few minutes later with her own plate, then sat down next to him at the table.

"What are you doing?" Gold asked incredulously.

"Eating breakfast." Belle said.

"Here? At my dining room table?" Gold asked.

"Where am I supposed to eat it?" Belle asked.

"Mrs. Potts always took her meals in her quarters. That is where you should take yours." Gold said.

"Downstairs? But the table is right here, why should I have to traipse down the stairs with a tray when I can just sit here with you? Besides – it's nice to have some company. Someone to chat with." Belle said.

"I don't chat, dearie. And I don't like company." Gold said.

"You don't ever have friends come to visit?" Belle asked.

"Anyone that comes here does so for business purposes only." Gold said.

"So you don't have friends. What about family?" Belle asked.

Gold looked up and glared at her, then continued to eat his breakfast.

"Girlfriend then?" Belle asked. Gold ignored her. "Boyfriend?" Gold scowled at her.

"Your job description, Princess, does NOT include playing Twenty Questions with me. It is to cook, to clean, and to shop for my daily needs. If I wanted to engage in pointless chatter I would get a parrot." Gold said.

"My name is BELLE. And there's no need to be rude. I was trying to be polite; something you're clearly incapable of. If I bother you so much then fine, I'll take my breakfast downstairs, Mr. Whatever-your-name-is Gold." Belle said angrily. She picked up her plate and stood up, and turned to walk away.

"Sit down, dearie." Gold said. Belle looked at him with surprise, and sat back down. "If you wish to have your breakfast here with me, then fine. But let's make a deal – if I feel like talking, I will start a conversation with you. Otherwise – we eat in silence."

"And what if I feel like talking? Then what?" Belle asked.

"Aren't you a librarian? Aren't librarians supposed to be quiet people? I agreed to let you stay here because that was my assumption but – apparently I assumed wrong." Gold said.

"Well you know what they say happens when you assume, don't you?" Belle asked, and she took another bite of her food.

"Quite mouthy too, aren't you Princess? No wonder you're still single at your age." Gold said. Fuming, Belle picked up her plate once again and stomped off, not once looking back at him. Gold finished the rest of his breakfast in silence. Which was exactly what he wanted in the first place.

* * *

Belle performed her household duties in silence for the rest of the day. Today was Friday – according to the work agenda left by Mrs. Potts, on Fridays she was to clean the foyer and the living room. She found the cleaning supplies and got to work. She brought Mr. Gold his lunch in his office as per instructions, and didn't say one word to him. That evening, after she had finished cleaning, she prepared his dinner. She was instructed that he took his dinner promptly at 6:30, and, right on time, he was waiting at the dining room table for it. Belle brought his plate out and set it in front of him.

"Thank you." Gold said, to her surprise. Belle did not respond, and turned to walk away. "Not going to speak to me then?" he asked.

"Thought you didn't want me to." Belle replied.

"Well, I don't but – it seems out of character for you now, especially after this morning. You may join me if you like." Gold said. "This time."

"Not interested." Belle replied, and she turned to walk away.

"That wasn't a request, Princess." Gold said.

"My name is BELLE." she spat at him. "It's not Lacey and it's not Princess, it's BELLE. I didn't ask for this to happen. I'm doing this job because I'm trying to help people, and for that I think I deserve respect at the very least. I don't have to put up with your attitude and your condescension toward me. You don't get to make judgments about me, Mr. Gold, because you know nothing about me at all. I certainly didn't judge you when I walked into this home and given its state and your obvious reclusiveness I had every right to. But I tried not to presume anything and I tried to be nice. Clearly, that's not something you want. And now all of a sudden you'll have my company as long as you order it? You can order me to do my work but not to keep company with you – as you made clear this morning, that's not part of my job. Leave your plate when you've finished, I'll clean it up after you've gone to bed. Good night – Mr. Gold." Belle stomped out of the room in a huff.

Gold stared in disbelief as he watched her storm out of the room. No one spoke to him that way. Not his business colleagues, and certainly not an employee of his. Who on earth did this girl think she was? But what bothered him the most wasn't the fact that she talked back to him – it was the fact that it didn't bother him at all.

* * *

The next morning, Belle served Mr. Gold his breakfast at 7:30 a.m. sharp, without uttering one word. She chose to wear a yellow uniform again that day. "Thank you." Gold said politely. Belle once again did not respond. "May I say something to you, Miss Woods?" he asked as she turned to walk away.

"What?" Belle asked in an angry tone as she turned around. "And it's French. BELLE FRENCH."

"You'd best get used to your new name, Princess – if you're going to leave the house on Monday to run errands you'll need to use it. And as for what I'd like to say, well - I'd like to apologize. For my rudeness yesterday." Gold said.

"Thank you." Belle said. "Apology accepted."

"You may join me if you wish – your choice." Gold said.

"I already ate my breakfast." Belle said.

"Well then – at least have some coffee. I would like to talk to you. If you please." Gold said.

"Alright." Belle said. She went to the china cabinet and took out a cup. She sat down, poured some for herself, and took a drink. "I've been doing all of the work you ask. Is there a problem? I mean – other than my chattiness." Gold smirked at her.

"Not at all." Gold said. "It just seems that – well, we got off to a bad start. I just want you to know that – well, I'm not a cruel man, I promise you that. I'm just – not used to company. Mrs. Potts kept to herself and didn't bother with me and I was fine with that arrangement. Clearly it's not going to be the same with you so – I'm willing to adjust. Provided that you do the same. I'm not one to answer questions openly, so – bear that in mind and I think we'll get on well. It's not personal, it's just – well I have to be careful in my line of business."

"Your line of business? What are you, some sort of spy?" Belle asked.

"Professional assassin." Gold said with a straight face. Belle was holding her coffee cup in her hand as he said this, and in shock she dropped it. It landed on the floor, spilling her coffee everywhere. Surprisingly, the cup didn't break into several pieces – it just received a small chip on the rim. "That was a quip." Gold smirked. Belle knelt down on the floor.

"I'm sorry it's – it's chipped." Belle said.

"It's just a cup." Gold said. "I suppose that wasn't the best attempt at humor given your – present situation and what put you here."

"I'll um – get something to clean it. What do you want me to do with the cup – your china set is incomplete now, can it be replaced?" Belle asked.

"It's only a small chip – no need to worry. Hardly even notice it." Gold said as Belle set the cup on the table. "Just clean it with the rest and put it back in the set."

"Yes – Mr. Gold." Belle said.

"Ian." he said.

"What?" Belle replied.

"My name. It's Ian." he said. "I suppose you deserve to know that much about me. In fact, I'll make you a deal – since you seem to be a curious one – you get one question per day. Provided that you ask nothing about my work, my personal life, or my past."

"Well that doesn't leave much other than trivialities." Belle said.

"That's the point." Gold said. "I'm assuming you'll eventually get bored with finding out trivial details about myself, and you'll stop. But until then – one question per day – and I will work on being less – condescending. Do we have a deal?" Belle thought about it for a moment.

"I suppose." Belle said. "So – what do you -"

"Ah – one question per day. And I already answered it." Gold said, pointing his finger in her face.

"You said that was a quip. It was, wasn't it?" Belle asked, not sure.

"Not that – my name. I told you my name." Gold said.

"But I didn't even ask it." Belle said.

"You asked it when you first arrived. And now you have your answer. Now clean up this mess before it leaves a stain." Gold said, and he looked down onto the floor at the spilled coffee. "Oh, and by the way – you're scheduled to clean upstairs today. You only worry about the east wing, which consists of my bedroom, bathroom, and study. The west wing is closed off and you are not to enter it. Ever."

"Why not?" Belle asked.

"You already have your one question for the day answered." he said. "Just do what you're asked. I'll expect my lunch at noon." He got up from the table and left the room. Now she was curious. Belle had yet to even venture upstairs. What on earth could be in the west wing that he was so reluctant to allow her to see? Belle knew one thing – if she got him to reveal his name within one day without even trying – she could certainly get him to reveal that. Eventually.

* * *

_I do appreciate the feedback and thank you so much for that! I'm charmedrumbelle on Tumblr if you'd like to follow my blog! _


	3. Chapter 3

_I am so excited for the amount of feedback, faves, follows, etc., that this little story already has! Thank you so much - I appreciate it and please do keep it coming!_

_I do not own 'Once Upon a Time.'_

**_Chapter 3_**

Belle headed upstairs to clean. She started in Mr. Gold's bedroom. Following the instructions Mrs. Potts left, she was to strip the bedding, put on a fresh set which would be found in the hallway closet, and vacuum and dust the entire room. She completed these tasks, then proceeded to the bathroom and cleaned in there. Belle was impressed at Mr. Gold's neatness – most men, in her experience, were slobs in general, but Mr. Gold appeared to be a bit of a neat freak – everything upstairs was in precise order. But then – everything in his life seemed to be in precise order, from the times he ate to what he ate – he had a specific menu for each day and each meal, and from what she gathered, he really didn't veer from that.

After serving Mr. Gold his lunch, Belle proceeded to his study. Belle entered the room and gazed around in awe. Well this was different. There were – many things in here. All sorts of collectibles and knick knacks. Everything seemed to be in its proper 'place', as it were but – she didn't think that Mr. Gold would be someone who was that much of a collector. Many of these items appeared to be quite expensive. Belle was instructed to dust each and every one of them, and she did so with great care. She was certain this task would take the remainder of the afternoon. She wondered where he got all of these items. But one thing piqued her curiosity more than the others – in a corner of the room sat an old-fashioned spinning wheel. It wasn't the wheel itself that was interesting, however; it was the fact that there was material on it waiting to be spun, as well as a fresh pile of yarn on a table next to it. He actually USED it – recently. This peculiar, crass man had a hobby of spinning yarn. What on earth was that about? Belle was determined to find out.

Mr. Gold was sitting at the dinner table reading a business magazine when Belle brought out his dinner that evening. He didn't say one word to her as she set his food down and poured his coffee. She did, however, notice that the cup he had taken from the cabinet was the one she had chipped the prior day. "Let me get you a different cup – this is the one I chipped." Belle said.

"It's fine – leave it." Mr. Gold said, then went back to reading as he at his dinner. Belle sat down at the table with him.

"Why do you have a spinning wheel in your study?" Belle asked. Mr. Gold looked up from his magazine.

"Because I do." he replied, then went back to reading.

"That's not an answer." Belle said. Mr. Gold stopped reading again.

"I told you that you were permitted one question per day, Princess. I didn't say that you could dictate how I answer them." he said.

"Well, you clearly use it, it's just – not a common hobby for a man. Or anyone really in this day and age." Belle said.

"I'm not a common man." Mr. Gold said.

"You're very neat. I mean – that's not a common trait in men, either. But you – seem to like everything in its place." Belle commented.

"Indeed." he said. Belle sat quietly for a few minutes.

"Why do you wear suits every day?" Belle asked.

"That's another question. You've already had one question answered today, but if you like I can bank that one for tomorrow." Gold said.

"Why bother? Your answer will probably be another snippy 'because I do'. Is that going to be the answer to every question I ask?"

"I'll save that one for Monday then." Gold replied.

"Well I just don't see why you have to wear a suit every day. You don't go anywhere and no one comes here. What's the point? I mean, if you're here alone all day you could just lounge about in your underwear and be comfortable instead of wearing those stuffy suits."

"I dress professionally because I prefer it. Do you have a problem with that?" Gold asked. Belle giggled a bit. "You find that funny?"

"I just got you to answer a second question. But then again you never really answered the first one so I guess that's fair." Belle said. Gold tossed his magazine down on the table and stood up. "You haven't finished your dinner." Belle said.

"I'm full. Thank you." Gold said. And he left the room.

* * *

The next day was Sunday. Mr. Gold took his breakfast at 8:30 on Sundays. It was the only day that he began a bit later than the others. But at 8:30 sharp, there he was, at the table, waiting for his breakfast. And dressed in a suit. "You're wearing the blue today, I see." Mr. Gold commented.

"Yes. Is that a problem?" Belle asked.

"No – it's fine. You wear whatever color you like." Gold said.

"So what do you do on Sundays then?" Belle asked.

"You just had a question answered, Princess, and you will not trick me into answering a second one today." Gold said.

"That didn't count!" Belle insisted.

"It was a question, was it not?" Gold asked.

"How come I only get one question per day, but you get as many as you like?" Belle asked.

"Because it's my house." Gold said. Belle smirked at him as Gold realized he had just answered another question. He glared at her and continued eating his breakfast in silence. Belle noticed the cup he was using – it was the one with the chip again.

"You're using the chipped cup again." Belle said.

"Yes I am." Gold said. "Does that bother you?"

"No. Whatever you like." Belle said. "So I clean your office today, are there any specific instructions for that?" Gold looked up at her and didn't say a word. "Well surely questions that pertain to my job don't count."

"Just clean per the instructions left by Mrs. Potts. That is all." Gold said. Belle sighed – such a frustrating man. She waited for him to finish his breakfast and leave the room. She cleaned up in the kitchen and after she was finished she proceeded to his office. As with everything else in his house, it was organized precisely. There was no clutter on the desk; it didn't even look like he used the desk at all. But there were file cabinets and she assumed that he had any documents organized in those, likely in detailed alphabetical and numerical order.

There were a handful of knick knacks on the mantle of his office fireplace, which she carefully dusted. As with the items in his study, they looked expensive and quite fragile. The lighting in his office was awful. He had a lamp on his desk and one standing lamp in the corner. It was dark and dismal and this was the room he spent the majority of his time in. No wonder he was so cranky all the time. She'd be cranky too if she were in the dark all of the time. Belle walked over to the window next to his desk and tried to pull back the blinds, but they wouldn't budge. Good lord, what did he do, nail them down? Belle walked out into the hallway and took a stepladder out of the hall closet and brought it into the office. She planted the ladder next to the window and climbed up to the top step.

"What are you doing?" she heard a voice ask from behind her as she fiddled with the blinds.

"Trying to let some light into this room. These blinds won't open, it's almost as if you nailed them closed." Belle said.

"I did." Gold said, moving closer to Belle until he was standing next to the stepladder. Belle tugged hard on one of the drapes until it released. Unfortunately, the weight of the drape took her by surprise and she fell backward so fast she was unable to stop herself from falling. Without thinking and without hesitation, Gold moved quickly, dropped his cane, and grabbed her in his arms as she fell. He held her without moving for a moment, staring at her in disbelief, then winced in pain at the pressure that her weight put on his leg and quickly grabbed the edge of the ladder for balance as he set her down. Belle caught her breath and trembled for a moment.

"Thank you." Belle said, not knowing what else to say to him. She picked up his cane from the floor and handed it to him.

"No matter." Gold replied, taking the cane from her and seeming a bit flustered.

"Is your leg alright?" Belle asked. Gold glared at her. "Come on, that's a legitimate question, it doesn't count."

"I'm fine." Gold replied.

"I'll see about fixing the drapes." Belle said, looking at the one side of the window that was now open.

"It's alright. I'll get used to it." Gold said, much to Belle's surprise. "Just leave it be." Gold ambled out of the room, and Belle watched him. He caught her. Without any thought for injuring himself. If he hadn't caught her she could have been hurt, badly. Killed, even. And he saved her. Belle smiled to herself – she truly did not understand this man at all. But something told her he wasn't as bad as he liked her to think. He wasn't just some grumpy and peculiar recluse – he was much more layered than that. And Belle was determined to peel those layers back one by one, no matter how long it took.

* * *

Monday arrived – it was the day that Belle was to go into town to shop. She was to take Mr. Gold's suits to the cleaners and pick up the ones that had been dropped off the week prior, and she had a list of items to get from the grocery store as well as the meat market. Belle was excited – it was a week ago that day that her life changed, and she had been moved from one isolated situation to another. But now she could at least get out for a bit. She was anxious to see people other than Mr. Gold. He had a car for her to take, and Mrs. Potts had left detailed directions for getting around the town. Belle had to remember to introduce herself as Lacey Woods to anyone who asked, which she didn't like. She hated the name – it made her sound like a tart. But she had no choice. She had to keep reminding herself that what she was doing was a good thing. She may even be saving lives by doing this. She supposed she could put up with Lacey if that was the case.

Belle made her rounds as instructed. She was cheerful and polite to everyone that she encountered. But no one seemed to act that way toward her in return. The moment they realized that she was there for Mr. Gold, they became quiet and stoic. Every last one of them. They conducted their business with her in a terse and abrupt manner. Belle returned to the manor saddened by this. Her first day out and about was not what she had hoped for. She was hoping to make some friends in this town at the very least, as Mr. Gold, although amusing, wasn't always the best company. But it seemed that her association with him was going to hinder her from doing that.

At dinner that evening, Belle sat down at the table, ready with her daily question. "Why do the people in town hate you?" she asked.

"I wasn't aware that they did." Gold replied.

"Well they weren't exactly nice to me today. As soon as they found out that I was your new housekeeper, their entire demeanor toward me changed. They were cold and impersonal and it seemed like they couldn't wait for me to leave." Belle said.

"Well, Mrs. Potts wasn't a social butterfly – she conducted her affairs in town every Monday ina purely business-like manner and then returned to the estate. They're used to that." Gold suggested.

"No – it was you. They don't like you." Belle said. Gold continued to eat his dinner, not responding. "You're not bothered by that?"

"That's another question." Gold said. "Which, I believe, falls under the 'personal' category that I told you I was not willing to discuss."

"So it does bother you then?" Belle asked.

"Miss Woods, I believe that I am done with your services today. Your day off is tomorrow and you have worked hard this week so I am generously offering you the opportunity to begin that time now. I will clean up after myself this evening." Gold said adamantly.

"I can still -" Belle began.

"That wasn't a request. Good evening, Miss Woods. I'll see you on Wednesday then." Gold said. Flustered and a bit angry, Belle left the room and headed downstairs. It bothered him – quite a bit, she could tell. Which intrigued her even more.

* * *

Belle didn't set an alarm the next day, as Tuesday was her day off. She allowed herself to sleep in and didn't awake until nearly ten in the morning. Mr. Gold was probably settled in his office, so she showered, dressed in her own clothes (which Emma had purchased for her) and made her way upstairs to have breakfast – or lunch – or maybe a combination of the two, though she hated the idea of 'brunch', it always seemed pretentious to her. Belle ate her meal quietly in the dining room, alone. After she finished, she decided to venture into town once again, this time for her own personal needs. She was hoping to find the town library, maybe check out a few books, but she couldn't seem to locate it. She returned to the grocery store to pick up a few things for her own personal needs, and was greeted with the same level of unfriendliness that she encountered the day prior. Such a cold, cliquish little town – the people in New York weren't always the friendliest lot, but at least they acknowledge your presence before they cursed at you. These people didn't even do that much.

Still unable to locate the library, Belle meandered along the streets of the little village. She came across a quaint little restaurant called 'Granny's Diner' and decided to stop in. She wasn't particularly hungry but perhaps a nice dessert was in order. She stepped inside the diner and sat down at the counter. A girl with long brown hair with a red streak in it, wearing a quite skimpy red waitress outfit, greeted her.

"Hi. Can I help you?" the girl asked with a smile on her face. It was the first smile Belle had seen in over a week.

"Yes. What do you recommend as far as the desserts here?" Belle asked.

"Well, Granny's cherry cobbler is the favorite – would you like to try it?" the girl asked.

"Yes, that sounds good. Oh, and an iced tea, unsweetened." Belle said.

"Coming right up." the girl said, and within minutes she brought Belle what she had ordered. Belle took a taste of it.

"Oh, it's wonderful!" Belle said.

"Made from scratch every day." the girl said. "Are you new in town? I've never seen you before."

"Yes – my name is – Lacey. Lacey Woods. I just moved here last week." Belle said.

"I'm Ruby Lucas. Nice to meet you." Ruby said. "So what brings you to Storybrooke?"

"I'm almost afraid to say." Belle admitted.

"Why? Is it some big secret?" Ruby asked.

"She works for him." an older woman interrupted. "That's what brought her here. She's the new maid."

"Oh, you – oh. I'm sorry." Ruby said. Her entire demeanor and tone of voice changed immediately.

"Why?" Belle asked. "He's not that bad – why does everyone react that way to him?"

"You've – met him?" Ruby asked.

"I work for him, of course I've met him." Belle said. "Haven't you?"

"Ruby – I need you in the kitchen." the older woman said.

"But Granny, I -" Ruby interrupted.

"Now." Granny said, and Ruby reluctantly complied. The woman turned and looked at Belle. "I think it's best if you find somewhere else to have your dessert from now on."

"But – why? Please, I don't understand. Why is everyone so frightened of Mr. Gold?" Belle asked. Everyone in the restaurant turned and looked at her at the mention of his name, and a silence fell over the entire place.

"We have our reasons." Granny said. "Now please - I think it's best that you leave."

"Well did he do something to you? Did he upset you the last time he came here?" Belle asked, and Granny began to laugh.

"Young lady, Mr. Gold never comes into town." Granny said. "He hasn't left his estate in almost twenty years."


	4. Chapter 4

_Again, I cannot thank you enough for the response to this fic! I truly appreciate it!_

_I've dropped a tiny little reference to another television show that I'm a HUGE fan of into this chapter. No, I'm NOT going there for those of you who figure it out - just thought it would be amusing for those who get it. (And those who don't, it won't matter anyway, you won't even know it's there.) I will be curious to see if anyone spots it though! _

_I do not own 'Once Upon a Time.'_

**_Chapter 4_**

Twenty years. He had secluded himself in this house for nearly twenty years, they said. Belle lay in her bed that night thinking about this. She wondered how old Mr. Gold was. She would guess late forties, or in his early fifties at the most. Good god – that would mean that when he shut himself off from the world, he was – well he was HER age, or very near it. What could have happened to him at such a young age to make him do that? She wondered if it was a mental condition; social anxiety or something like that. He certainly wasn't much of a conversationalist. Or perhaps he was agoraphobic. It was clear that the man had money, he had to earn it somehow, so he had to be sane in order to hold down a job that kept him in such an exquisite setting. And he wasn't a stupid man by any means – it was apparent to Belle early on that he was very intelligent. Not necessarily book smart like she was but – he had a very sharp mind, that was without question. So why lock himself away from the world? And what kind of a career would permit him to do so? So many questions – the more she got to know Mr. Gold, the less she understood him. Yet the less she understood him – the more she wanted to.

Belle brought Mr. Gold his breakfast the next morning. She set his plate in front of him and poured his coffee, all while saying nothing. He was still using that chipped cup. It's like he deliberately picked that one out of the cabinet every morning. Was he mocking her? Trying to get in a subtle dig at her clumsiness and gullibility for falling for his little 'quip' as he put it? Belle tried not to think about it. Instead, she went into the kitchen and fixed herself a plate. She was going to eat with him this time – whether he liked it or not. She sat down at the table with him, and he didn't say a word to her.

"Are you going to talk to me?" Belle asked. Gold looked up at her.

"Eventually I suppose I'll have to." he replied. Belle was quiet for a moment.

"I went into town yesterday." she said. He did not respond. "Was hoping to find the library but I couldn't manage to do that. Maybe next time. I'd like to get some books to read." Belle said. Gold remained quiet. "It's a nice little town, but – well there's just one small problem. Nobody likes you." He still said nothing. "I know that bothers you even if you won't admit it – it would bother me too. The problem is that – well, because I work for you – nobody likes me either. And I really don't think that's fair."

"Life isn't fair, Princess. You'd do well to learn that." Gold finally said.

"So I don't get to make any friends then? Just because you don't care if you have any friends doesn't mean I feel the same." Belle said.

"Making friends is not what you are here for." Gold said. "Need I remind you that this – situation – is for your protection and nothing more. If it weren't, I would have sent you packing the first time you sat down with me at my dining room table, uninvited, and started prattling away."

"I don't think you would have." Belle said. Gold did not respond. "I think you're lonely. And I think that you like it when I sit down with you and prattle." Belle reached out and touched his hand, a soft smile forming on her face. Gold looked down at her hand in disbelief, then up at her, but he did not pull away from her. "Have you really not left your estate in twenty years?" Gold pulled away from her at this point.

"You've already had your question answered for today." Gold said. "I have work to do. And you – have laundry to do. I'll take lunch in my study today, Miss Woods. Thank you." Gold stood up and walked away.

* * *

Wednesday, as it turned out, was laundry day. Belle was to wash all of Gold's clothing, his bedding from the prior week, and all of the towels for the kitchen and bathroom. She was then to iron and press any items that required it, and put everything away in an orderly fashion. She had already looked in his closet once while cleaning the room the other day; his clothes were organized by color. And he had nothing but suits. Not one item of casual clothing. He owned suits, pajamas, undergarments, and several bathrobes. And nothing else. Not even one pair of jeans.

Belle spent the bulk of the day in the laundry room, which was located in the basement, adjacent to her quarters. She carefully watched the time so that she would have his lunch prepared and taken up to his study promptly at noon. When lunch time arrived, she headed upstairs and approached his study. She was stunned to find him at his spinning wheel. "Mr. Gold – I have your lunch." Belle said.

"Just set it on the coffee table." Gold said. Belle sat the tray down, and walked over to his side.

"What are you working on?" Belle asked. Gold did not reply. "You seem to be very good at it. Do you make anything or do you just spin the yarn and then just leave it?" Gold still did not reply. "You have quite a few rugs downstairs in the dining room and the foyer, and in your office – did you make those?"

"Miss Woods, if I answer your questions, will you then kindly vacate my study so that I can enjoy my lunch in peace?" Gold asked. "Clearly one question a day isn't going to satisfy your curious nature, is it? I will up your limit to three, will that be satisfactory enough? I hope it is because I am quickly losing my patience with you. Yes, I do things with the yarn other than spin it, and yes, all of the rugs in the house were made by me. You have your answers – now please go."

"Well, you're very talented. I'll see you at dinner then." Belle said, smiling, and she left the room. He makes rugs. Interesting. Well at least he has a hobby, Belle thought to herself. The man needs something to do, being cooped up in this house for twenty years and all. She really couldn't understand what all the fuss in town was about over him. Sure, he was a bit eccentric, but he was basically harmless. And she was certain that his icy and distant demeanor was all for show. She was right – Ian Gold had many layers to him. And she had uncovered one of them in less than a week. She wondered what else she would uncover in the next week. The thought of it excited her far more than she thought it would.

* * *

Thursday arrived – it had officially been one week since Belle took up residence in Mr. Gold's home. In this time, she discovered that he was a man who expected precise order in his life in everything, he took his coffee with sugar only, no cream, and his hobby was spinning and making rugs. His house was quiet; he didn't watch television or listen to music or anything like that. And the only thing she ever saw him reading were newspapers and business magazines, all of which were delivered to his house daily. She never saw him use a computer. Did he even HAVE a computer, she wondered. This house seemed devoid of most modern luxuries. She wasn't even sure he had a cell phone. He had an old-fashioned looking desktop phone in his office. She spotted no other telephone in the house, not even in his bedroom. He acted distant and cold and very crabby but he wasn't all bad. He did save her when she fell on Sunday; that was a surprise. So there had to be some kindness within him. She sensed that about him. She sensed that he wasn't at all the person she initially thought he was. And she was glad.

Belle went out into the dining room to serve him breakfast at 7:30 sharp, as usual, but Mr. Gold wasn't sitting at the table waiting for her this time. That was odd. He was never late. Belle wasn't sure what to do. Was he alright? Should she go upstairs to look in on him? She breathed a sigh of relief when he entered the room. "You're late." Belle said.

"Only a few minutes. Had something important to take care of." Gold said, and he sat down, his breakfast already waiting at his place setting.

"Work?" Belle asked. Gold glared at her. "Sorry – no work questions, I forgot." Belle said. "But who on earth does business this early in the morning?"

"There are other time zones in the world, Miss Woods." Gold replied.

"So you have business connections on an international level, then?" Belle asked.

"Didn't say that." Gold replied.

"Well you certainly implied it." Belle said. Gold ate his breakfast, continuing to ignore her. "Do you like your work?"

"My job does not require me to like what I do. It just needs to be done. I've already told you more than I care to so if you're going to continue this line of questioning it will be met with silence. And actually, you've already met your 'three question' quota for the day, so it will be met with silence regardless." Belle shrugged her shoulders and sat down at the table. She had no plate in front of her, nor coffee cup. She just sat there and watched him eat. After several minutes, Gold finally looked up at her. "Is there a problem, Miss Woods?"

"No. Just – trying to figure you out." Belle said.

"Well good luck with that." Gold said. "I'll be in my study again today for lunch. Just leave the tray outside the door, it will be closed and I don't wish to be disturbed. I'll put it back outside the door when I've finished. I'll see you at dinner time then. And I expect the floors to be spotless, and do take care with my rugs when you clean those, quite a bit of work went into making them." Gold got up and left the room. On Thursdays, Belle was to mop and wax all of the non-carpeted floors in the house. This included the foyer, the stairs, kitchen, and dining room. She was also to clean all of the rugs in the house, as well as dust in the dining room and clean the kitchen. And then the cleaning cycle repeated once again.

Belle muddled through the next several days, cleaning and cooking and asking questions of Mr. Gold and receiving his usual cryptic answers. Monday finally arrived once again, and she went into town to shop and was greeted with the same coldness that she received the prior week. But just as she was determined to figure out more about Mr. Gold, she was determined not to let these silly townspeople get her down. She would continue to be polite and she would hopefully win them over in time.

On Tuesday, Belle once again venture into town on her day off. Her primary purpose was to seek out the library, which apparently she would have to do on her own because no one in town wanted to speak with her. She walked by Granny's Diner once again. She was told not to go back in there – but Belle had enough of being told what to do from Mr. Gold. So she opened the door and stepped inside, then approached the counter. Ruby stared at her in disbelief.

"Hi." Belle said. "Ruby, right?" Ruby nodded but said nothing. "Look, I – I don't want any trouble, I just – I just want to know where the library is. You seem really nice – can't you at least talk to me?" Ruby thought about it for a moment.

"I'm off in fifteen minutes, I worked the early shift today. Wait for me outside – I'll bring you some lunch and some of that cherry cobbler you liked. You better go before Granny sees you. Okay?" Ruby said.

"Alright. Thank you." Belle said, and she left and waited outside on a bench. Several people walked past her. Some stared, some whispered, and some did both. She was starting to hate this little town – she actually received more warmth and friendliness from Mr. Gold than she did from these people. Ruby finally came outside carrying a bag with her.

"Come on – let's go over to the park, it's only a few blocks." Ruby suggested. They walked together and found a picnic bench to sit on. Ruby took some food out of the bag. "I hope you like hamburgers – Granny's are the best."

"It's fine, thank you." Belle said, and the girls began to eat their lunch. "So have you – lived here all your life?"

"Yeah. Pretty much. I mean I wasn't born here, but – my parents died when I was five and – well I moved here to live with my grandmother." Ruby said.

"Oh – I'm sorry." Belle said.

"It's okay." Ruby said. "You were asking about the library. Storybrooke doesn't have one."

"No library? Why not?" Belle asked.

"It's really not a very big town, I guess no one has ever seen the need for one. There's one in Collinsport, it's the next town over but – I wouldn't recommend going there, it's kind of a creepy place, lots of weird stuff happens there." Ruby told her.

"Well, I'm not allowed to leave Storybrooke anyway, so I guess that won't be happening." Belle said.

"Is that one of his rules?" Ruby asked.

"Kind of." Belle replied.

"What's he like? Mr. Gold?" Ruby asked.

"He really never comes to town?" Belle asked.

"Not in all the years I've lived here. He used to – a long time ago. He still collects the rent but – we just have that delivered to him." Ruby said.

"Rent?" Belle asked.

"He owns this entire town. All of the properties, everything. I mean he's not a bad landlord, if things need fixing they get fixed, he always sends someone. But he – there are just – stories about him." Ruby said.

"Well I don't think he's all that bad, really. Just – misunderstood. Maybe you can come over some time and meet him." Belle said.

"Oh I don't think so – Granny would have a fit. She hates him." Ruby said.

"Why? What has he done?" Belle asked.

"She kind of – blames him for stuff." Ruby said.

"What stuff?" Belle asked.

"Look – Lacey – I'm sorry, I've already probably said too much. I just want you to know that – well, the rest of the town might hold the fact that you work for him against you, but I don't. If you want to come here again next week and meet me for lunch, we can. Okay?" Ruby said.

"Alright. Thank you." Belle said.

"12:30 will be good. Next Tuesday. I'll see you then." Ruby said, and she got up and left, leaving Belle with even more questions about the elusive Mr. Gold than ever before.

* * *

Belle arrived back at the estate at around three in the afternoon. She managed to find some books she hadn't read at the local drug store and purchased them; romance novels, not really her favorite genre but at least it was something to read. She entered the foyer and was shocked to hear loud shouting coming from upstairs. It was Gold's voice. What on earth could be wrong? Curiosity getting the better of her, she made her way up the stairs.

"How could you be so bloody stupid!" she heard Gold scream, his Scottish accent becoming thicker. "Of all the idiotic, incompetent moves – this was NOT supposed to happen! Have you learned NOTHING from me!" he screamed. His voice was coming from the study. Belle nervously walked down the hall when she reached the top of the stairs. By the time she arrived at the open door of the study, Gold was wandering through the room like a madman, smashing several of his cherished knick-knacks with his cane and screaming in anger. Belle gasped at the sight as she watched him. Gold didn't notice her at first, but then he looked up and saw her after a moment. His eyes were filled with anger; it was a look she had never seen on him before. He looked menacing – monstrous. Like a wild beast ready to attack. "What are you doing here, Princess?" he asked, gritting his teeth.

"I – I heard you shouting and – who were you shouting at?" Belle asked, trying to hide the fact that she was a bit nervous. She hadn't shown him any fear before and she certainly wasn't going to start now.

"Well who does it look like? Myself. I was shouting at myself. You wanted to figure me out, Princess? Well there you have it. I'm a madman – certifiably insane. Is that what you wanted to know? Well now you have proof. And you'd best go – before I take this cane and use it on you." Gold said, and he started to move toward her. Belle did not move.

"There are two glasses of tea. On the coffee table. Someone was here. Probably still is. You don't scare me, Mr. Gold. And I know for a fact that you're not mad. Perhaps obsessive-compulsive and bit socially awkward, but – I've spent enough time with you to know that you're as sane as I am. I'll let you get back to – whatever you were doing. And you can tell your visitor to come out of hiding, I'll make myself scarce for the rest of the day. I'll see you at breakfast then." Belle sauntered out of the room, as Gold watched her, completely flustered. He stood there gaping at the spot where she had stood for several moments until finally a voice spoke up from behind him.

"Boy, she sure has your number, doesn't she Gold? I thought I was just setting up a witness protection situation – didn't know I'd be making a love connection." Emma said. She walked over to the coffee table and picked up one of the glasses of iced tea. "The infamous Ian Gold, left tongue-tied and speechless by a little librarian. I guess miracles really do happen. Cheers." Emma said with a smug look on her face as she raised the glass to make a mocking toast, then took a drink.


	5. Chapter 5

_One more for this week. Please do keep the feedback coming - and WOW! to all of the new faves and follows! Welcome! I really appreciate all of the positive response to this story! Just FYI - EVERY detail in this story is important! :)_

_I do not own 'Once Upon a Time.'_

**_Chapter 5_**

"So – what's going on with you and the librarian?" Emma asked.

"Nothing." Gold replied, and he walked over to a painting that was hanging on the wall. He moved it back – it was on a hinge. Behind it was a wall compartment that contained several bottles of alcohol – he reached for one of them.

"Don't tell me nothing, Gold – I know what nothing looks like and that wasn't nothing. There was something there." Emma said. Gold ignored her as he took a long drink straight from one of the open bottles. "Hey – you were supposed to cut that crap out."

"I need to calm my nerves." Gold said. He put the bottle back and closed the compartment, then put the painting back in place.

"Didn't Dr. Hopper recommend taking up yoga?" Emma asked. "You should probably call him." Gold turned and stared at her.

"You don't get to tell me what to do, Miss Swan. You're not the one in charge." Gold said, and he picked up his cane and pointed it at her.

"Oh, put that thing down, don't you point that damn cane at me." Emma said, shoving the cane away. "You gonna clean up the mess you made? Because I don't think that your maid should be doing that."

"Yes, that is what I do, isn't it? Clean up messes. And back to what we were discussing – you made quite a fine one, didn't you?" Gold asked.

"It was ONE mistake. I made a wrong call, I'm sorry, I'm not perfect. It's not the end of the world, at least no one got killed." Emma said. Gold shot her a furious glare and turned away from her. "Sorry – bad choice of words, I didn't mean -"

"I believe we're done here, Miss Swan. I'll take care of cleaning up the mess. Both of them. You can see yourself out." Gold said, not looking at her.

"Look – it won't happen again, okay? You know damn well that I have a HUGE stake in this, one that you personally understand better than anyone. I'll be back tomorrow – through the front door this time, I want to pay a visit to your maid – I want to make sure that – well that everything is going the way that it's supposed to with her. Call Hopper – I mean it." Emma said, and she walked over to what looked like a wall in the study. She pushed on the wall; it was a hidden door. She walked through it and it closed behind her.

* * *

The next morning, Gold was waiting promptly at 7:30 for his breakfast. Belle brought it out to him and set it down, not saying a word. She went back into the kitchen and got his coffee and poured it for him (still in the chipped cup – he was definitely mocking her, she was certain now) in silence. She set the coffee pot down on the table and turned to leave.

"Miss Woods – please – sit down." Gold said.

"Is that an order?" Belle asked.

"I said please." Gold said. "And just to prove that I'm a generous man, I won't count that toward your allotment of three questions." Belle reluctantly sat down. "About yesterday – I – I just wanted to say I'm sorry."

"Okay." Belle replied. "Apology accepted."

"Do I frighten you, Miss Woods?" Gold asked. Belle hesitated for a moment.

"No." Belle replied. Gold raised his eyebrow at her, surprised. "Frustrate would be a better word. But you don't frighten me. You never have."

"I um – I have a bit of a temper sometimes. I have to do better at that." Gold said.

"Well, I'd be angry too if I hadn't left the house in nearly two decades." Belle said. Gold looked down, not saying a word, a sadness coming over his face. "It's true, isn't it?"

"It's complicated." Gold said. "You wouldn't understand."

"I'm a pretty smart girl, Mr. Gold. I think I probably would. If you ever want to talk about it, that is." Belle said. She stood up and walked behind him, then put her hand on his shoulder. "You haven't touched your breakfast. Eat – before it gets cold. I have to get started on the laundry." Gold shivered when Belle touched his shoulder – he stared ahead and didn't say a word. After Belle left the room he sat in his chair, perfectly still, for several minutes. He looked down at his breakfast. He barely took two bites, then he stood up and walked away.

* * *

Later that day, Belle was upstairs putting Mr. Gold's clothes away when he entered the room. "Miss Woods – there's someone here to see you." he said. "Miss Swan. The young lady who brought you here to me." Gold said. "She's in the living room, you can meet with her there." Gold left the room. Belle finished hanging up Gold's clothes in the closet and went downstairs to meet with Emma.

"Hi – come to check up on me?" Belle asked.

"I said I would." Emma said. "Come on – sit down, let's talk." Both Emma and Belle sat down on the sofa. "How are things going?"

"Fine. Everything's fine." Belle said.

"Gold's not driving you crazy?" Emma asked.

"A bit, but – I can handle him." Belle said. "He's not that bad." Emma snickered a bit.

"Really? I've heard quite a few descriptive words used about Gold over the years, but – 'not that bad' – first time I've heard that one." Emma said. "Sorry that I didn't clue you in on all of the details but – this was really the best arrangement we could come up with for you, and I was afraid if I told you about him you'd back out."

"And do what? Go back to New York and put myself and my family and friends in danger?" Belle asked. "I'm managing fine. It's not forever, right?"

"You know you're taking all of this pretty well, considering. I appreciate that." Emma said. "I'll be honest, I'm really shocked that you haven't called me on that phone I gave you. I kind of expected you to be on the phone with me screaming within the first day."

"Like I said – he's not that bad." Belle said. "He's – interesting."

"Okay, so another word that I've yet to hear used to describe him. Well, I just wanted to make sure everything was okay here and I wanted to update you. We had a bit of a setback yesterday with the case – it happens sometimes. But don't worry – we're working on getting this whole situation under control. I know that you want to get back to your life and I promise, we'll make that happen as fast as we can. So you're – okay here then?" Emma asked.

"I'm fine. Really." Belle said.

"Do you need anything from me?" Emma asked.

"Maybe some books. There's no library in this town and the stores don't have much to offer." Belle said.

"I'll see what I can come up with. I'll stop by again in a few weeks, and don't forget – any problems, just give me a call." Emma said.

"Okay." Belle said. "I need to get back to work, I still have quite a bit to finish. Thank you for stopping by."

"Any time." Emma said, and they walked out into the foyer together. Gold came out of his office as they did.

"Everything alright then?" Gold asked. He looked over at Belle and she smiled at him.

"Fine." Emma said, watching both of them carefully but subtly.

"I'll see you soon, Miss Swan." Belle said, and she left the room. Once Belle was back upstairs, Emma and Gold went into his office and closed the door.

"Well?" Emma asked. Gold went over to his desk, pulled an envelope out of a drawer and handed it to Emma.

"You owe ME a favor now, Miss Swan, I hope you realize that." Gold said.

"Lucky me." Emma replied sarcastically. "Did you call Hopper?" Gold sighed.

"He'll be here next Tuesday." Gold said.

"Why wait so long?" Emma asked.

"Because that's her day off and I don't want her here." Gold said.

"You don't want her to know that you see a shrink? Like she'd be surprised by that after your little hissy fit yesterday." Emma said. "By the way – and I honestly didn't think I'd have to be saying this to you about her or – hell, about ANYONE but – you do realize what a really, really, REALLY bad idea it would be if you and her ever -"

"Miss Swan, I have no intention of any such thing, and quite frankly, I find it ludicrous that you would even think that." Gold said.

"Did you see the way she looked at you? Cause I did. And what's more important – I saw the way YOU looked at HER." Emma said. "That girl is the key to putting this case to bed once and for all. And I don't want you screwing it up simply because you can't keep it in your pants."

"Miss Swan, I realize that you pride yourself on your so-called intuitive skills, but – well it appears you're slipping quite a bit lately. First your recent debacle that set all of the work that's been done back by months, and now this – completely misguided idea that there is something of a romantic nature going on between myself and Miss Woods. Nothing could be further from the truth." Gold said adamantly.

"Well, for once I hope I'm wrong." Emma said. "I'll be in touch." she said as she moved toward the office door, and then she left.

* * *

That evening, Belle served dinner to Gold as usual. He sat staring at his plate, picking at his food. "Are you alright?" Belle asked.

"Fine." Gold replied unconvincingly.

"You didn't eat your breakfast this morning. And you barely touched your lunch. I can't help but wonder if I'm doing something wrong with the cooking." Belle asked.

"No – it's fine. I'm just not very hungry today, that's all." Gold said. Belle sat down at the table and scooted her chair close to him. She reached out her hand and touched his forehead. "What are you doing?" Gold asked.

"You've been looking a bit pale today. Just checking to see if you have a fever." Belle said. Gold pushed her hand away.

"Miss Woods, you are my housekeeper, not my nursemaid. And I'm fine – I just – have a lot on my mind today, that's all." Gold said, and he started to eat his dinner. "See? Happy now?" Belle smiled at him.

"Well, I'm glad you're alright." Belle said.

"I take it your discussion with Miss Swan went well then." Gold said.

"It was fine." Belle told him.

"You seem to be taking all of this in stride, Miss Woods. Most people wouldn't handle such an upheaval of their life with as much grace as you have." Gold commented.

"Well, I'm not most people." Belle said.

"No – that you are definitely not." Gold said. "So why, then? Why have you so readily accepted this – fate that you've been dealt?" Belle thought about it for a moment.

"Heroism. Sacrifice. I figured if I did the brave thing then – bravery would follow." Belle said. "Miss Swan said that you were told all the details of my situation, and I'm sure you presumed that I would be some spoiled little heiress, and yes, I was quite spoiled. I'm an only child and my father did dote on my quite a bit. But I can take care of myself. I've always loved books and I've spent hours getting lost in stories of adventure my whole life. I just never thought I'd get to go on one. So that's how I see this – as an adventure. Of course, I'm sorry that it happened the way it did, with some poor man's death at the hands of that horrible woman, but – if I can have some part in seeing that justice is served – then this is the least I can do." Belle said. Gold watched her intently as she spoke, taking in every word.

"So what was your life like before – all of this?" Gold asked.

"Nothing that exciting." Belle said. "I worked at the library and I would visit my papa one or two days a week. That's it really."

"No romantic endeavors then? I find that hard to believe." Gold said.

"I was seeing someone for a while, but um – it didn't work out. He was – quite boring, actually. Very shallow, superficial – nothing like what I expect to find when it comes to love. To me love – love is layered. Love is a mystery to be uncovered. And I just – haven't been able to find that in New York." Belle said. They were both silent for a moment. "You know I – still have two more questions left today."

"You do." Gold said.

"Why haven't you left this house in twenty years?" Belle asked.

"That falls under categories that you are not permitted to ask about." Gold said.

"Well, you just obtained some personal information about me. I think it's only fair that you offer me the same consideration." Belle said. "I mean – given the fact that the town isn't exactly friendly toward me, it's highly unlikely that I'll get to know any of them on any sort of intimate level. If I'm not going to really know anyone during the time I have to spend here – can't I at least know you?" Gold thought about it for a moment.

"It's not a good idea for me to leave. Let's just say that – I'm in a very similar predicament as you are." Gold said cryptically.

"How old are you?" Belle asked.

"Fifty." Gold replied.

"So you were my age then – when you stopped going out. I can't even imagine that. It was hard enough as it was to just leave my life behind, but – to have no contact with the outside world at all for all that time – I don't know if I could do that. You must have a good reason. I'm very sorry." Belle said.

"It's no matter. I've um – I've accepted my fate. Hopefully yours will – well hopefully, you won't have to endure being here much longer." Gold said.

"I wouldn't say there's anything to endure." Belle said. "Thank you – for telling me these things." Belle reached out and touched his hand, just as she had done once before. "Finish your dinner, alright?" Belle smiled at him, then stood up and left the room. Gold's hand trembled and he looked down at it. He drew his breath in and swallowed hard. He took one more bite of his dinner and then left the room.

* * *

Another week went by, and Gold and Belle continued their dining room discussions. Gold's level of talkativeness depended on his mood; some days he would carry on lengthy conversations with Belle, and others, he barely said two words. She didn't see him at all on Sunday; he informed her on Saturday that he would be taking all of his meals in his study that day, and to just leave them at the door. Belle ran her errands on Monday, and as usual, the townspeople couldn't be done with her fast enough.

On Tuesday, Belle arrived at the park at 12:30 to meet with Ruby. Ruby was the only person that was even willing to give her a chance; she was hopeful that they might eventually develop a friendship. Gold was polite enough company, but Belle missed her girlfriends in New York and it would be nice to have one here. She saw Ruby coming and waved at her happily. Ruby approached her. "Hi." Ruby said.

"Hi. It's good to see you again. How was your week?" Belle asked.

"Um – Lacey – we have to go somewhere else." Ruby said.

"What? Why?" Belle asked.

"Some people saw me here last week with you and – they told Granny. She was mad." Ruby said.

"So what? You're a grown adult, why should it matter what you do?" Belle asked.

"Because it does." Ruby said. "It's part of the pitfalls of living in a small town. Everyone knows everyone else's business. Except for Mr. Gold – nobody knows what he does. Well, except for you." Belle laughed a bit.

"I'm not even sure I know what he does." Belle said. "Hey – that's an idea. I have car, we can go there."

"Where? To the house of horrors?" Ruby asked.

"It's not a house of horrors, it's just a house. I've been there three weeks now, trust me, if there were any monsters there I'd have seen them by now." Belle said.

"Some people think your boss is the monster." Ruby said. "I don't know, Lacey."

"He's not that bad. I promise." Belle said. "We can go downstairs to my quarters, talk for a bit, we probably won't even see him." Ruby thought about it for a moment.

"Okay – why not." Ruby said. "I've always wanted to see what that house looks like anyway."

"Come on – let's go." Belle said, and they headed for the car together.

* * *

"So – how are things?" Archie Hopper asked Gold as they sat in the living room across from one another.

"They are as they are." Gold replied.

"Did you have a slip up?" Archie asked. "Is that why you called?"

"Close. More of a – preventative measure. At Miss Swan's urging." Gold said.

"Ah. Well – what triggered it?" Archie asked.

"Incompetence on her part mostly. But I fixed it – as always. So – we're good." Gold said.

"That's it? Anything else?" Archie asked. "I hear through the grapevine that you have a new housekeeper. How's that working out?"

"Rather well." Gold said. "Better than I expected, actually."

"You want to talk about her?" Archie asked. "I mean, this has to be an adjustment for you. What's she like?"

"She talks a lot. Always chirping on about nothing and everything. And she asks questions. Lots of them. Constantly asking questions." Gold said.

"How long has she been with you now?" Archie asked.

"It'll be three weeks on Thursday." Gold replied.

"Three weeks, huh? With a girl who likes to talk and ask questions – and you who likes quiet and would prefer not to tell anyone anything. How is that working out well then?" Archie asked.

"It just is." Gold replied.

"What's her name?" Archie asked.

"Lacey. Lacey Woods." Gold replied. "She um – she dropped one of my cups, third day she was here. Chipped it."

"And did you lose your temper?" Archie asked.

"Actually, no. I um – I was very calm about it. It's just a cup."

"Right, I know how much you like your things. So you stayed pretty calm – good for you. I don't think you would have been able to do that even a year ago, would you have?" Archie asked.

"No, it's unlikely that I would have." Gold agreed.

"Well, you should be proud of that. And it sounds like this – Lacey is a good influence on you." Archie said. The two men heard noises from the foyer – the voices of two girls chatting and laughing.

"What the bloody hell?" Gold said, and he stood up and stormed out into the foyer. Archie followed behind him. He immediately set his eyes on Ruby.

"Miss Woods! Would you like to explain the meaning of this." Gold said in an angry tone of voice.

"This is Ruby – we met in town, I told her she could come over. We won't bother you, we're going down to my quarters just to gab for a bit." Ruby looked at him and gasped.

"You're Mr. Gold. I – it's nice to meet you. You're noting like I imagined." Ruby said.

"I see you have company, I – we'll go downstairs." Belle said. "Sorry to bother you."

"In my office Miss Woods. NOW." Gold said.

"Why? It's my day off, I just -" Belle began.

"That wasn't a request." Gold said, gritting his teeth. He grabbed her arm and shoved her in his office, then shut the door behind them.

"What is your problem? Am I not allowed to have friends over on my day off?" Belle asked.

"I thought you said you weren't making any friends." Gold said.

"Well, it turns out that I am. But because of YOU, she doesn't want to be seen with me in town, so I invited her here." Belle said.

"What do you know about that girl, other than her wardrobe choices are questionable at best." Gold said, remarking on Ruby's short skirt and low-cut top.

"Her name is Ruby Lucas. She's twenty-five years old, she works at Granny's, and -"

"I mean what do you know of her background? Her family, her friends – anything. Miss Woods – you are here for protection. And it is important for you to note that, given your situation, NO ONE is above reproach. You should not be trusting anyone. And if that means not making friends – then so be it. Now kindly tell that painted up little tart out there to go home and not return." Gold said.

"I can't do that." Belle said.

"That wasn't a request." Gold said.

"I mean – I drove her here. I said I'd take her back into town after her visit." Belle said.

"Well then – your visit is done. Take her back." Gold said.

"No." Belle said defiantly. Gold began to fume in anger.

"I said take her back!" he screamed, and he picked up his cane and slammed it against his desk, knocking the phone off of it. Belle glared at him, and stormed out the door.

"Come on, Ruby – we'll find somewhere else to go." Belle said. Gold stood in the doorway and watched Belle and Ruby leave. Archie stood in the background, observing the entire scene. Gold swung his cane against the front door several times after Belle and Ruby left.

"Was that really necessary." Archie asked him.

"In this case? I think it was." Gold said.

"You left out some details, didn't you? About Lacey." Archie said.

"What about her?" Gold asked.

"Why didn't you tell me you had feelings for her?" Archie asked.

"Have you been talking to Miss Swan?" Gold asked.

"No. Just – based on what I observed. Your facial expressions, your body language – you're in love with her, aren't you?" Archie asked. Gold didn't answer him. "Well?"

"It doesn't matter. Even if I were – I can't have her." Gold said. "Ever."

* * *

"I'm sorry. I don't know what's wrong with him, he was fine yesterday." Belle said as she and Ruby headed back toward town. "He can be a bit of a grump sometimes."

"A grump? He wasn't being a grump, he was being psychotic." Ruby said. "Lacey – you need to get out of that house."

"I can't." Belle said. "It'll be fine. I probably should have – asked first, about bringing you over. That's all."

"So he's acted like that before then?" Ruby asked.

"He's not violent, he just – acts out. He told me he has issues with his temper and he's working on that." Belle said.

"That's probably why Dr. Hopper was there." Ruby said.

"Who?" Belle asked.

"The man that was with him – that's Dr. Archie Hopper. He's – Lacey, he's a psychiatrist." Ruby said. Belle turned to her in surprise as she pulled up at the curb near Granny's diner. "Listen, I'm really nervous about you going back there. Can I have your number so that I can call and check up on you?"

"I um – I don't have a phone." Belle said.

"Well let me give you mine, call me tomorrow." Ruby said.

"I can't." Belle said.

"He doesn't have a phone in the house?" Ruby asked.

"Yes, but – I don't think I'm allowed to use it." Belle said. Ruby stared at her in disbelief. "Ruby – it's not what it sounds like, it's complicated and I can't tell you why, I'm sorry."

"Lacey – I didn't want to tell you this because I didn't want to freak you out or anything, but – after what I saw today I think I need to. The reason my Granny hates Gold is – because of my parents." Ruby said.

"I thought you said they died." Belle said.

"They did. Lacey – Granny says that – Mr. Gold is responsible for their death. They died because of him." Ruby said.


	6. Chapter 6

_Yes, this story has just taken on a life of its own and I can't stop writing it. I am VERY grateful for the positive response! Thank you all - please keep the comments coming!_

_Oh, and regarding this chapter, I only have this to say. I_ _regret nothing. :)_

_And I don't own 'Once Upon a Time.'_

**_Chapter 6_**

The next morning, Belle entered the dining room with Gold's breakfast. She set it in front of him; threw it in front of him was more like it. She then went back into the kitchen, brought out the coffee pot, slammed it down on the table, and turned to walk away.

"Aren't you going to pour my coffee?" Gold asked.

"Pour it yourself." Belle sniped. "And you can stop using that damned chipped cup, I know you're doing it deliberately. There's no need to mock me, it was an accident. I offered to replace it and there's no reason for such immature antics." Gold looked up at her in disbelief.

"Is that what you think I'm doing? Mocking you?" Gold asked. "Princess, if I were mocking you, it would not be subtle, be assured of that." Belle glared at him angrily. "This is about that girl in the skimpy dress that you brought here yesterday, isn't it?"

"What do you think?" Belle asked. "I didn't ask to be put in this situation. But here we are. I found ONE friend – one person in this entire bloody town that's willing to give me a chance at friendship, and I can't even have that much. And you're no help. I try to get to know you, I try to be nice, and all you do is yell and beat things with your cane and just when I think that maybe, just maybe things are getting better you – you really are a beast."

"What are you going to do? Quit? And go where? Go ahead – call Miss Swan. Tell her how horrible I am, it won't be any surprise to her, she's probably stunned it hasn't happened already. Even if you do – you won't be able to go anywhere and be safe. It could take weeks before you're placed in another secure situation. One that's even further from your home – maybe even out of the country. Is that what you want?" Gold asked.

"So you're not going to apologize then?" Belle asked.

"I have nothing to apologize for, Miss Woods. I was merely looking out for your best interest. If anything you should be thanking me." Gold said.

"THANKING you? For what? Running off my only friend? It's amazing she was even willing to come over here at all given that she's been told you -" Belle began, then stopped herself mid-sentence.

"What?" Gold asked.

"Forget it." Belle said.

"No – please. Enlighten me. What did the little girl in the way-too-short skirt have to say to you?" Gold asked. Belle hesitated for a moment.

"She said that you're responsible for the death of her parents." Belle said. Gold crossed his arms and looked at her.

"Did she now?" he asked. "And what do you think? Do you think me capable of such a thing, Miss Woods?" Belle hesitated again.

"I – I don't think you would hurt anyone out of malice." Belle admitted. "I think that's why you lash out at inanimate objects when you lose your temper. I think that's why you keep so many knick knacks around the house. So you can have something to break when you get angry. Better those things than – people."

"You're a very perceptive girl, Miss Woods. Very perceptive, indeed. How about this? I apologize for embarrassing you in front of your friend. But you have to understand – even though you are in a secure situation, you are NOT fully safe. The people that have surrounded you have security clearance and are trying to keep you safe. But anyone else – they could either be friend or foe. And there is no way to tell that until it's too late. NO ONE is above reproach."

"You sound like you work for them." Belle said.

"We have a mutually beneficial business arrangement. I needed a housekeeper and you needed a safe and remote place to hide. Miss Swan and I had a personal connection from a previous business arrangement, and she knew that if you came here, as my maid, not one person in this town would want to be bothered with you. And, well – you being you, you found the only person in town that would be. So my question is – why is that? Is Miss Lucas just being friendly – or does she have other intentions? It's my natural inclination to err on the side of caution, Miss Woods. Unfortunately I may turn out to be wrong in this case. But if I'm not – it's just not worth the risk. I'm sorry."

"Okay. I understand – I suppose. But you never answered my question. Are you responsible for the death of Ruby's parents?" Belle asked. Gold paused for a moment.

"I am not. But I can understand why she would think that." Gold said.

"Why?" Belle asked. "Something to do with your past or – your work?"

"Yes." Gold replied. He looked down at his plate. "I believe my breakfast is cold."

"Sorry. I'll – I'll make you another plate." Belle said.

"No matter – I'm not that hungry right now anyway. Just – make an extra portion for lunch, and I'll take it a bit earlier – eleven sounds good." Gold said. "Do we – have things cleared up now? Am I out of the dog house, so to speak?" he asked. Belle smiled at him.

"I suppose you are." Belle said. "I just wish you wouldn't be so cryptic with me all the time. Why can't you just tell me what you're thinking or what you're feeling? Why do you have to toy with words all the time?"

"I believe you've met your quota of questions for the day, Miss Woods. I'll be in my office. I'll see you at lunch then." Gold got up from the table and left, and Belle sighed in frustration. There had to be some way to get through to this infuriating man, she thought to herself. But how?

* * *

The next two weeks went by, and Belle and Gold continued their daily banter – she would ask him questions, and he would answer, sometimes cryptically, sometimes directly, and frequently not at all. But she could tell that he was making an effort to be more calm and polite with her. He hadn't lost his temper during this time – that was new. And he was saying things like 'please' and 'thank you' more often. And the last few evenings she ate dinner with him and he would even engage in banter at dinner time with her. Belle was becoming quite adept in forming her 'questions' as statements so that he was answering far more things than he realized he was.

It was her fifth Sunday at his estate, and Belle was busy cleaning his office when she heard the doorbell ring. She thought that odd – no one came calling on a Sunday. No one came calling at all, really, except for Dr. Hopper (although he was yet to introduce him or admit to her who the man was) and the postman, who simply dropped the mail at the doorstep, rang the bell, and ran off in a fright. Belle was going to answer but by the time she got out into the foyer, Gold was closing the door. In his hand was a single red rose. Belle looked at him with surprise.

"Who was that?" Belle asked.

"Old lady at the door selling flowers. She buzzed the gate and I let her in – figured if she was brave enough to come here I might as well see what she was peddling." Gold said. He offered her the rose. "For you – if you'll have it." Belle smiled at him and took the flower from him.

"Thank you – you're very kind." Belle said. She playfully curtseyed at him, and he in turn bowed to her. "Do you have a vase? I mean – you don't really keep flowers around here, do you?"

"There should be some in the pantry. Mrs. Potts used to enjoy them, she'd bring home a fresh bouquet for herself now and then, and I would usually get her one for her birthday." Gold said. Belle went into the kitchen and opened the pantry door – she moved some things around and found a small vase buried in the back. She took it out, filled it with water, trimmed the stem on the rose, and went into the dining room and set it in the middle of the table. Gold followed her into the kitchen and then the dining room, watching her every move.

"Is something wrong?" Belle asked.

"Just – trying to figure you out." Gold teased. Belle laughed a bit.

"Well, you're not trying hard enough. It shouldn't be that difficult." Belle said. She walked over to him and gave him a hug. Gold stood motionless, trembling a bit. "Thank you again. I'll have to return the kindness somehow."

"No matter. Now – are you going to get my lunch or not?" Gold asked, his tone of voice changing.

"I'll get started right now." Belle said, and she went into the kitchen. She started to think about going out tomorrow to shop. Maybe she could find something special for him – some sort of a surprise to repay his kindness. She thought about it while she was fixing his lunch, and suddenly it dawned on her – she knew exactly what she was going to do for him.

* * *

Belle strolled into Granny's Diner after she had finished all of her errands that Monday. Everyone in the restaurant stopped and stared at her. "I thought I told you that you weren't welcome here." Granny said tersely.

"My money is as good as anyone's. I'd like two cherry cobblers please. To go." Belle said.

"I don't have any obligation to serve you." Granny said.

"Granny – please." Ruby interrupted, walking behind Granny. "I'll get them for you, Lacey."

"Thank you." Belle said. Ruby stepped away, and came back a few moments later with a bag.

"Things have been okay then?" Ruby asked.

"Fine." Belle said. "I'm sorry I didn't come to see you last week, I just thought that – well after -"

"It's okay. Maybe tomorrow? If you can?" Ruby asked.

"I'll try." Belle said. "Thank you, Ruby. I'll see you later." Belle said, and she left.

* * *

That evening, Belle served Gold his usual Monday evening dinner entrée. He cleaned his plate and commented on how delicious it was. "Are you ready for dessert then?" Belle asked. Gold looked up at her and smiled.

"Most definitely. I have – quite an appetite today." he said. Belle went into the kitchen and came back out with a dessert plate and set it in front of him. Gold looked down at it, then looked up at her. "What is this?" he asked.

"It's cherry cobbler. It's from Granny's diner – it's delicious, I know you like cherry pie, you have that every Saturday, so -"

"Monday is APPLE FRITTER day, Miss Woods!" Gold screamed. "If I wanted cherry cobbler, I would have told you to GET me cherry cobbler!"

"I just thought I'd surprise you, I was trying to do something nice after you got me that rose yesterday." Belle said.

"I don't need you to do anything NICE for me! I don't WANT you to do anything nice for me! That isn't what you're here for!" Gold screamed. He picked up the dish and flung it onto the ground, shattering it. Belle stepped back nervously, shaking a bit.

"I thought things were getting better with you. But they're not, are they? You really are a beast, aren't you?" Belle said. Gold marched over to her and got into her face.

"Don't you ever forget it." he snarled, and he stomped out of the room and up the stairs. Belle looked down on the floor at the shattered plate and the dessert lying in a pile on the floor. For the first time since the day she arrived at the estate, Belle began to cry.

* * *

After cleaning up the mess that Gold made, Belle went downstairs. She showered and changed into a pair of pajama pants and a t-shirt. She was still quite upset from her encounter with Gold. She didn't understand – things had been going so well the past two weeks. She just couldn't figure out what was wrong with him. He had been so nice to her, and he hadn't shown any sign of his temper since their long talk almost two weeks prior. She thought they had – been growing closer. Belle cried for nearly half an hour, then settled down. She went into the kitchen and did the dishes and cleaned everything up. She went back downstairs, opened her night stand drawer, and took out the phone that Miss Swan had given her. There was no reception in the basement, so she went upstairs. There was still not much reception in the kitchen, so she stepped out into the foyer. She'd had enough. She was done trying – this man wasn't going to change. Not for her. Not for anyone. Belle was just about to dial the phone when she heard the sound of something crashing to the ground coming from upstairs. What on earth was he doing up there, she wondered. Probably having another fit. Belle sighed in disgust – why must he have such a foul temper? Over cherry cobbler no less. Let him destroy his entire damned study, she thought to herself. It wouldn't be her problem much longer anyway. She picked up the phone again when she heard another crash. That's it, she decided. She was going to have it out with him once and for all – if she was going to be done with him, he was damn well going to know why. It was about time someone told him off. Belle stomped up the stairs and marched over to Gold's study. The room was a wreck. There were several broken knick-knacks strewn across it. And there was Gold, leaning against his spinning wheel, his back to her, his cane in one hand and a nearly empty bottle in the other. "That's enough of this." Belle shouted. Gold turned around.

"Oh – look who it is. The little maid." Gold said. He started to move toward her and staggered – he was drunk. VERY drunk. "Come to watch the beast in action, have we Princess?" he asked, slurring his words, his Scottish accent thickening. Belle looked down at the bottle he was holding. She reached for it and he pulled it away. "Ah – can't get it! It's mine! All. Mine." Gold said, and he took another drink. The second he finished, Belle quickly yanked it from his hand. There was barely any liquid still left in the bottle – it was a bottle of Scotch Whiskey.

"Was this full when you started drinking?" Belle asked.

"Took one little drink last week – or was it two weeks? Or three? I forget. Damned Emma Swan." Gold grumbled, and he tried to get the bottle back from Belle but she pulled it away.

"My god, you had to have had what – that's over a dozen shots of straight whiskey!" Belle said.

"I'm Scottish – I can handle it." he said, his words becoming more and more slurred.

"Right. You look like you're handling it well." Belle said sarcastically. "All this over a cherry cobbler?" Gold got in her face and pointed his finger at her.

"You – you come into my home with your pretty blue eyes and your annoying questions and your constant chatter and you make me tell you things I've never told anyone. And you touch my hand and you smile at me and you – you broke my cup." he said drunkenly. "That tea set has been in my family four – what do you call it? Four generations. Brought it here from Scotland. And you broke one. And I didn't get mad at you. Because you're pretty. I've never seen a pretty as girl as you, Miss Woods." he said, slurring his words and mixing them up. Belle couldn't help but laugh at him, even though she knew she shouldn't.

"Is that why you use the cup? Because you didn't get mad that I broke it?" Belle asked.

"It reminds me that I can be in control – of – this." Gold said, and he waved his hand around the room at the mess of knick knacks strewn across the floor, stumbling as he did so. Belle set the bottle of whiskey down on the coffee table and grabbed him to steady him. "If I choose to be that is – and I choose not to be today, because that is my choice."

"Come on – let's get you to bed." Belle said, putting her arm around him. Gold dropped his cane on the floor and began to laugh.

"You'd like that, wouldn't you? I've seen you flirting with me, you think I haven't noticed that? That's why you brought me something nice, to flirt with me and tease me. Why would you do that, you don't even like me." Gold said as she walked with him. He leaned heavily on her and she struggled to keep him upright.

"I like you very much, Mr. Gold." Belle said.

"Ian." Gold said as she sat him down on the bed and started to pull back the covers. "Please call me Ian. Nobody ever calls me that anymore."

"Okay – Ian. Come on – let's get you out of these clothes." Belle said, and she started to remove his jacket. Gold started to laugh again.

"You're taking my clothes off." he said, his words becoming more incoherent.

"Yes, I am. Can't have you passing out wearing this stuffy suit and tie, you'll choke yourself." Belle said.

"Can I take your clothes off, too?" he asked. "I think I'd like that."

"Not tonight, sweetheart. Maybe some other time – we'll have to talk about that when you're actually sober." Belle said.

"I think I'd like taking your clothes off. I bet you're beautiful under them. Just as beautiful as you are with them on. Have I told you that you're beautiful?" Gold asked as Belle fumbled with his tie and managed to remove it.

"Well, you said I was pretty a few minutes ago – I believe that's the same thing." Belle said. She unbuttoned his shirt and helped him off with it. "I'm going to go get a pair of your pajamas out of the drawer, alright? Can you stay sitting up?"

"Of course I can. I'm not that drunk." Gold said. The moment that Belle stood up and walked away, Gold flopped backward onto the bed. Belle shook her head as she took out a pair of pajamas from the drawer and went back to the bed with them. She sat down on the edge of the bed, grabbed Gold's arms, and pulled him back up.

"Come on – let's get you dressed for bed." Belle said. She glanced briefly at his bare chest – there were several scars there. Old injuries that had already healed, two on his chest and one on his shoulder, and there was a scar that looked like a surgical scar on his abdomen. Belle instantly felt pity for him, but turned her focus back to getting him settled in bed for the night. He was extremely willing in allowing her to put the pajama top onto him. His eyes started to look glazed over and she knew she had to finish at least this part quickly because she thought he was likely to pass out at any moment. Once both of his arms were in the pajama top, she began to work on buttoning it. She was halfway finished when she felt him cup her chin in his hand. Belle looked up at him.

"So beautiful." he whispered. He moved his lips toward her and kissed her. He gave her several soft kisses on the lips and then smiled – it was a drunken smile but Belle could still see the sincerity in it. "Come to bed with me, Lacey. Please." he said, his words slurred. "No – not Lacey. You're not Lacey, that name isn't right. I need to find out what prat at the agency picked that name for you and have them fired. It doesn't fit you at you at all. You're Belle. Belle, Belle, Belle. Beautiful Belle." he said. Belle blushed a bit and she finished buttoning his pajama top. "Please come to bed with me because I'll be sober tomorrow and I won't have the courage to ask you. I'm a coward, Belle. Did you know that? I'm a coward." He wrapped his arms around her and put his head on her shoulder. He started to kiss her softly on the neck.

"Ian – no. You're very drunk. And you won't even remember any of this in the morning." Belle said, pushing him away.

"I am will too not remember this." he said, slurring his words and not making sense at all. He sat up for a moment and started to sway a bit, then turned to look at her. "Belle."

"What?" Belle asked.

"I think I'm going to be sick." he mumbled. Belle sighed.

"Come on – I really don't want to clean up that mess, let's get you to the bathroom, good thing it's not far." Belle said. She helped him stand up. He put his arm around her and he leaned against her even more than before. He was still wearing his suit pants and shoes. "Can you get down on the floor?"

"I can do that. Getting up is a bit trickier." he said. Belle helped him kneel down on the floor. He winced in pain when his right knee hit the ground. He leaned over the toilet bowl and heaved for several minutes, as Belle held back his hair and held onto him. When he was done he fell into Belle's arms and nuzzled against her. "Take me to bed, love. I don't feel well."

"You're going to feel even worse tomorrow." Belle remarked. "Come on – let's get you up. Here – I'm going to put your hand on the sink counter. You hang on to that and I'll pull you up, alright?"

"Whatever you say, love. I'll do whatever you say." he mumbled. After some struggle, Belle got him into a standing position and led him to bed, having even more difficulty getting him to walk than the prior two times. He was barely able to remain conscious at this point. When Belle reached the bed with him, she held onto him as she pulled back the covers a bit further and eased him into the bed.

"You need to drink a bit of water before you completely pass out. I don't want you getting too dehydrated." Belle said.

"I just want to sleep." he mumbled.

"I know, sweetheart. I just want to get some water in you, I'll be right back." Belle said. She went back into the bathroom and got a cup and filled it with tap water, then went back into the bedroom. Gold's eyes were closed, his mouth open a bit and he was snoring softly. "Ian – come on wake up for just a minute, then you can sleep, alright?" Belle said, shaking him. He mumbled and groaned. Belle tapped his face several times until he opened his eyes. "Ian. Here – just drink a bit of water, I don't want you getting sick in your sleep and this will help." Belle said. She put her arms around him and helped him sit up, then put the cup of water to his lips. "Come on – take a drink, nice and slow." she said. After a bit of coaxing she got him to drink the water. He coughed a bit as he took the final drink and she held him close and rubbed his back gently. "It's alright. You're alright, Ian." She eased his head back on the pillow and grabbed two more, propping them up behind his head so that he wasn't lying back flat. Belle gently ran her hand across his forehead and down his cheek. "I hope you didn't have much planned for tomorrow love, because you're going to have one hell of a day. If you had drunk much more or if I hadn't come up here you'd have likely gotten alcohol poisoning."

"I should be so lucky." Gold mumbled.

"Don't say that." Belle said. "I need you. Where on earth would I go if anything happened to you?"

"You're going to leave me anyway. I'm going to lose you just like I lost Bae. That's why I can't have you, Belle. That's why I push you away. I'll hurt you, just like I did Bae, and I don't want to hurt you." Gold said, his eyes barely staying open.

"Who's Bae? Ian, who's Bae?" Belle asked, but Gold closed his eyes began snoring almost immediately. Belle took off his shoes, leaving his socks on. She fussed with the belt on his suit pants, then lowered the zipper on his pants and carefully began to remove them. Gold mumbled incoherently several times as she did this but didn't awaken. When Belle finally got his pants off she glanced at his right leg – it was badly scarred. She could tell by the looks of it that he had wounded it quite severely. She could tell the scar traveled down to his ankle, but he still wore his socks so she couldn't see it. Belle took his pajama bottoms and struggled to put them on him, his dead weight becoming difficult to maneuver, as Gold was completely passed out at this point. It took her some time, but she finally got the pajama bottoms on him. She got him settled under the covers. Belle debated over whether or not to stay with him for the night. She was pretty sure he wasn't going to wake up for quite some time, but she was concerned that he might become sick in his sleep and choke. He had drunk quite a bit – she was amazed that he remained conscious for as long as he did after she found him. That only told her one thing – this wasn't the first time he'd drunk himself into a stupor like this. And she realized it wasn't over cherry cobbler – it was over her. He was in love with her. She could see it in his eyes, as glazed over as they were. And even drunk, he wasn't able to say the words, although he said everything but. Belle couldn't help but smile a bit to herself. Because as irritating as this man was – she felt the same way about him.

Belle quietly left the room for a moment – she decided it would be best for her to remain upstairs with him that night, just to make sure he was going to be alright. She headed back downstairs to turn all of the lights off, as she had left them on. She then headed back up the stairs. She was just about to enter Gold's room when she noticed something odd. There was a door that was cracked open and a light was on inside of the room. It was room in the west wing. He had told her explicitly that she was not to enter that part of the house. Oh, but she was sure that he wouldn't want the light on in there all night. He must have been in there before he went into his study and started drinking and forgot to close it.

Belle nervously approached the room and pushed the door open a bit further. She was stunned at what she saw. The room was filled with toys. Toys that clearly belonged to a child – a male child, maybe about the age of nine or ten. But they were older toys – Star Wars and superhero figurines and digital games that were popular in the early 1990's but were long since obsolete. It looked like some sort of shrine. There was bed with GI Joe bed sheets, spread, and pillow cases. Next to the bed there was a small wooden nightstand. There was a photo on the nightstand. It was him – it was a photo of Gold. A much younger version of Gold – with a young boy, probably around eight or nine years old. There were several framed awards hanging on the walls – most of them elementary school academic awards. And they had the same name on them. Bailey Neal Gold.


	7. Chapter 7

_Gotta admit, I had fun writing this one. Next chapter will get more intense, so I thought this was necessary. Enjoy! Oh, and THANK YOU for the reviews - I am truly humbled! I'm so glad you're enjoying this story! Please keep the feedback coming! And welcome new readers!_

_I do not own 'Once Upon a Time.'_

**_Chapter 7_**

Belle was awake for most of the night. A son. Bailey – Bae – had to be his son. And judging by the types of toys that were in that room, not to mention the dates that were on the certificates hanging on the walls and the photo in which Ian was clearly a much younger man, late twenties at most – Bae was about nine or ten years old twenty years ago. Was that why he locked himself away from the world? Because of his son? What happened to the boy? There was only one thing that made sense, and Belle's heart broke at the thought of it. The boy had died. He said he lost him. What else could he have meant? And based on what Ian said to her just before he passed out – whatever happened to the boy was his fault.

After Belle left the room in the west wing, turned the lights off and closed the door, she went back into Gold's room. He was snoring quite loudly, his mouth wide open as he breathed in and out. Belle climbed into the bed with him. She presumed that he didn't usually snore this badly, but being so drunk he was likely having more labored breathing than usual. Belle thought it would probably be better for him to be lying on his side; he was less likely to snore and, more importantly, less likely to start vomiting in his sleep, though she could hardly imagine he had anything left in him TO vomit, given how sick he had gotten earlier in the evening. Still, better to be safe in this situation. Belle lifted his head up a bit; he mumbled incoherently as she helped him to turn on his side. Once she got him settled on his side, his snoring subsided quite a bit. Belle lay back next to him, and softly ran her fingers through his hair. "You're not going to remember anything about last night, are you sweetheart?" she whispered. "We're going to have to go back to my pointless questions and your cryptic answers and dance around the fact that this is not just an employer/employee relationship, aren't we? Because if I tell you what happened you'll deny it. Maybe I should ply you with alcohol tonight and record your antics, then you'll have to admit the truth when you're sober." Belle said. Gold moaned and sighed a bit as Belle spoke to him, running her fingers through his hair carefully. Belle lay awake for several hours, thinking about everything that had happened that day. At some point, she simply closed her eyes and fell asleep.

* * *

Belle awoke early the next morning to find Gold sprawled out on top of her, the weight of his body pushing her down. He was lying on his stomach, his cheek lying on her breastbone with the top of his head nearly touching her chin, and his arm and leg stretched across her body. Belle was surprised that his bodily shift didn't awaken her; she must have been in a pretty deep sleep to not have noticed. Belle looked down at Gold; his snoring had stopped but his breathing was loud and heavy; his mouth was open wide and he was drooling a bit onto her t-shirt. Belle couldn't help but laugh at the sight of him. His pallor was quite pale and she knew he was going to be terribly hung over if not just flat out sick for most of the day. The amount of whiskey he had taken in would have sent most people to the emergency room, but it was obvious his body had built up a modicum of tolerance for it. She wondered how frequently he drank like this – and she was saddened at the thought that she was the one who led him to do this to himself, or at least his denial of his feelings for her. No, she shouldn't pin this on herself – he made his choice. He would be feeling pretty ill though, and she knew she wouldn't have the heart to taunt him – at least not today.

Belle looked over at the clock on the nightstand – it ready 7:23. Seven minutes until he was supposed to eat breakfast. Belle laughed to herself at the thought. He wouldn't even be awake at 7:30, let alone able to keep his breakfast down. She, however, was quite hungry – she really hadn't eaten much the night before due to her frustration over Ian's meltdown, and then she spent the majority of the evening making sure that he didn't lapse into a coma from his massive whiskey intake. Belle slowly and carefully slid herself out from under Gold's weight, taking every care not to awaken him. As she moved out from under him, Gold shifted a bit and turned his face completely downward into the mattress. "Not face down love, you need to breathe." Belle whispered, and she lifted his head and eased him back onto his side.

"No." Belle heard him mumble quite clearly, then he mumbled a few more incoherent words that she couldn't make out at all. He was lying flat on the mattress, and she grabbed a pillow and lifted his head gently and placed it under him. Gold responded with a soft snore. Belle ran her fingers gently through his hair as she did the night before.

"I'll be back up in a bit to wake you, love. Maybe you'll be sober by then." Belle said to him quietly, though she doubted that would be the case. She knew he'd be dehydrated and likely still a bit drunk when he awoke, but she'd worry about that later. He'd made it through the night without incident and aside from the day of misery that lay ahead from him, he was going to be fine.

Belle made her way downstairs and the doorbell rang just as she was halfway down. Presuming that it must be Gold's breakfast being delivered, Belle darted toward the door and opened it quickly. She was hoping to inform the catering service not to bother with lunch and dinner, but when she opened the door she saw the car already heading back down the long, winding driveway. There was a tray covered in foil lying on the ground, and Belle picked it up. She took a peek inside – it was sausage, home fries, and the most delicious looking biscuits she had ever seen. Well, he certainly wasn't going to be eating this breakfast, she thought to herself. No point in letting it go to waste. Belle took the meal into the dining room. She went into the kitchen and put on a pot of coffee, then got some orange juice out of the refrigerator and poured herself a glass. She went back into the kitchen and sat down and ate Gold's catered breakfast. It was wonderful – far better than anything she cooked for him. She couldn't wait to see what was coming for lunch, because he certainly wouldn't be up to eating that either. He could eat like this for three meals a day, every day – and yet he chose to have a maid with mediocre cooking skills at best. He really was a lonely man. Trapped for twenty years in a house with a room filled with the remnants of the life of a young son who was no longer there. Belle then got to thinking about other things, such as – if Ian had a son – the son must have had a mother. Whatever became of her, she wondered. Clearly he lost her, too – but there was nothing of her memory left behind. There wasn't even a photo of her in the entire room dedicated to Bailey. She thought that odd, and wondered why that was.

After she finished eating, Belle poured herself some coffee and sat back down in the dining room. She glanced down at the cup she was using – it was the chipped cup. Belle laughed a bit to herself. This silly little cup was what started everything. Professional assassin. Professional pain in the arse was more like it. What DID he do for a living, she wondered. He had to do something, the money had to come from somewhere unless he was some sort of heir to a dynasty, and she doubted that based on the looks of the little chipped cup. She knew from her own upbringing what inherited heirlooms from a wealthy lineage looked like, and this tea set had very little value other than one of sentiment.

Belle finished her coffee, then went downstairs to shower and change; it was technically her day off so she changed into jeans and a solid blue top. She had a mind to leave him upstairs to fend for himself this morning, but Belle wasn't that cruel. She knew that he'd be quite a wreck, both physically and emotionally. And besides, she did love the damn fool. Now she just had to figure out a way to get him to admit that he felt the same about her, and to do so while sober. Belle quickly realized that this was going to be a far more taxing task than anything Gold had asked her to do so far.

Shortly after nine in the morning, Belle made her way back up the stairs with two items; one was a bottle of drinking water, and the other was a glass filled with what looked like a smoothie type drink. She headed into Gold's room; he was still sleeping as soundly as ever, and it didn't look like he had moved one inch since she left the room nearly two hours prior. She set the two drinks down on his nightstand. Belle knew that she had to get him to drink some water and start to wake up from his stupor. She braced herself for what was to come as she sat down on the edge of the bed and started to tap him gently on the cheek. "Ian – come on. Time to wake up for a bit." Belle whispered as quietly as she could while still being heard. Gold groaned and rolled over onto his back, not opening his eyes. "Hey – come on, sleepyhead. Time to get up, sunshine." Belle said.

"Mmmm." Gold moaned as he turned his head toward Belle's voice and allowed his eyes to flutter open.

"Hi there, handsome." Belle said as she smiled a big smile at him. Gold's eyes widened at the sight of her, and his heart began to race, pumping with a sudden rush of adrenaline.

"What are you doing here?" Gold asked, and he bolted up into a sitting position. Pain rushed through his head like nails stabbing him. He grabbed his forehead with both of his hands and moaned out loud in pain, then eased his head back onto the pillow. He began to breathe heavily, gasping for each breath, his heart racing and his head pounding. Every single part of his head hurt, all the way around, as if he were being pounded in the head by a bevy of hammers.

"Calm down, it's alright. No need to give yourself a heart attack on top of everything else." Belle said, squeezing his hand. Gold looked up at her nervously.

"What happened?" he asked.

"You had yourself quite a night." Belle said, and she continued to smile at him.

"With you?" Gold asked in disbelief.

"In a manner of speaking." Belle said. "I have something that will help quite a bit. You need to sit up a little – let me help, alright? Not so fast this time." Belle reached her arm behind Gold and slowly eased him into an upright position. She continued to brace him for support with her right arm as she reached onto the nightstand for the smoothie drink and picked it up. "Here – take a drink."

"What is that?" Gold asked.

"Just a concoction that my college roommate and I invented. It actually tastes quite good and it helps a great deal in taking the edge off the hangover." Belle said.

"Hangover?" Gold asked.

"Yes – that is what this is, you have had one before, I presume." Belle commented.

"Never this bad." Gold replied.

"Well given the amount that you drank last night I'm impressed that you can even form complete sentences right now. Drink." Belle said. Gold took a small sip, then looked up at her.

"It tastes good." he said.

"I just said that." Belle replied. "Drink it all down – then we'll get some water in you." Belle said. Gold downed the drink slowly, and when the glass was empty, Belle reached for the bottle of water. She opened it and offered it to Gold, who had moved himself to sitting upright by leaning against the headboard of the bed.

"I need coffee." he mumbled, pushing the water bottle away.

"No, you need water. Coffee won't do a damn bit of good for you, you need to rehydrate if you want to sober up. All that coffee will do is make your headache worse." Belle said.

"Miss Woods, do you really have to talk so loudly? I'll drink the water, just don't shout at me please." Gold said, taking the water bottle from her and taking several slow sips.

"I'm barely whispering." Belle said. "If I were shouting right now, you would be screaming in pain. Finish the whole bottle." Gold continued to drink until the water bottle was empty. Belle then took it from him and set it down next to the empty glass. "There. How do you feel?" Gold looked up at her.

"How do I look?" he asked.

"Like hell." Belle replied.

"Well there's your answer. And that's one question down for the day." Gold said. He slunk back down and rolled over on his side, covering his head with both of his hands and groaning a bit.

"It's my day off, we're not counting questions, love." Belle said.

"Please go have your day off somewhere else." Gold said.

"No – I'm good here." Belle replied. Gold moved one of his hands and peeked up at her.

"You're enjoying this aren't you?" he asked.

"Just a bit." Belle teased. She put her hand on his shoulder. "You'll be fine."

"I need to take a piss. And I'm not sure I can stand up." Gold said.

"Well, you certainly can do that here in bed, but – don't expect me to clean that. Again – it's my day off." Gold moved his other hand away from his face and glared at her. "Come on – let's get you up, alright?" Gold started to sit up and Belle helped him. She braced him by holding him from behind until he was eased into a sitting position. She helped him swing his legs over the edge of the bed and sit up.

"Where is my cane?" Gold asked.

"That would be wherever you dropped it in the study last night." Belle said.

"Please stop shouting." he whined, putting his hands against his face.

"Sorry. I'll try to be quieter." Belle whispered. "I'll get your cane – be right back." Belle stepped out of the room for a moment and came back with his cane in hand. "Here you are – although even with the cane I don't think you're going to make it to the bathroom without falling over. I'll help you."

"You're not going to stand there and watch me take a piss, Miss Woods." Gold insisted.

"I'll turn my back. But I won't be having you stumbling and falling over and hitting your head on something." Belle informed him. "You ready to go?" Gold sighed in both pain and frustration as he slowly stood up. The moment he did the room began to spin around him and he started to sway. "Still a bit drunk, aren't you? That'll pass." Belle said as she put her arm around him to keep him from falling.

"Just get me to the bathroom and stop with your incessant yammering, please." Gold said as he looked down at the floor, unable to even lift his head up again.

"Well at least you're remembering your manners, that's something." Belle joked. She promised herself she wouldn't taunt him or be cruel to him today – but there was no reason she couldn't have a bit of fun with him in other ways. This predicament was, after all, his own doing. Belle helped him to the bathroom without saying one word, and when he was done she helped him back to bed, again in silence. Gold lay back in bed, grabbed the covers, and pulled them over his head. "You need anything else?" Belle asked.

"Go. Away." Gold grumbled from underneath the blanket. Belle picked up the glass and water bottle that she had brought upstairs. She sighed as she left the room. He didn't remember a damn thing.

* * *

Belle spent the next two hours reading one of the books that Emma had brought for her; typical romance, nothing exciting but she didn't have much else to do. She really wasn't in the mood to go into town and it's not like she had any access to a computer or even a bloody television set. Did this man do ANYTHING for fun, she wondered? Well, except for his spinning wheel – she supposed that counted as fun. To him, anyhow.

Gold's lunch was delivered promptly at noon; Belle went to the door to retrieve it. Once again, the car sped off before she could even say anything to them. She opened the tray – Lasagna Florentine with a side salad. It looked delicious. She took it into the dining room and helped herself; he certainly wasn't going to be able to keep this down. After she ate Gold's catered lunch, Belle decided it was probably time for the beast to wake up and eat something himself, since he clearly wasn't coming downstairs any time soon on his own. Belle prepared two slices of toast, and spread strawberry jam on them, his favorite. She then grabbed another bottled water and headed upstairs.

Belle peeked into Gold's room; he was still lying in bed, his entire body completely covered as it was when she left several hours prior. She knew he'd be crabbier than ever before but he did need to eat something. Belle approached his bed; she set the toast and water on his nightstand and pulled the covers off of him quickly. He didn't even budge; he was still sound asleep. Belle sat down on the edge of his bed and shook him gently. "Ian – you need to eat something, come on, wake up." Belle whispered. Gold mumbled and yawned as he opened his eyes. Belle took the bottled water and handed it to him as he sat up a bit. "Here – drink some more water." Gold leaned back against the headboard and started to drink the water. She then handed him the plate of toast. Gold looked down at it.

"Where is my breakfast?" he asked.

"This is it." Belle said.

"No, I have it catered today, this isn't what I eat on Tuesdays." Gold said.

"Well this is what you eat this Tuesday, it's about all you can handle at the moment without getting sick." Belle said. "And if you throw it on the floor, so help me I will pick up your cane and bang it loudly on every wall in the room just to make you miserable." Gold took the plate from her and started eating the toast. He glared at her in silence. After he finished eating, he handed the plate back to her. "There. Finish your water." Belle said.

"So was my breakfast delivered?" Gold asked.

"Oh, yes. It was delicious." Belle said, smirking at him. Gold's eyes widened.

"You ate MY breakfast?" he asked.

"Well, you certainly weren't going to, you weren't even conscious at 7:30 in the morning." Belle said. "Lunch was wonderful, too; lasagna Florentine has always been a favorite of mine." He stared at her in disbelief.

"What time is it?" he asked. Belle glanced at the clock.

"Your clock says 1:23 but I believe it's about five minutes fast." Belle said.

"I've been sleeping all day then?" Gold asked, running his fingers through his hair.

"Well, you were up for a bit this morning, do you remember that?" Belle asked.

"Yeah. You gave me some fruit concoction and you were very loud." Gold said.

"Am I loud now? How's your head?" Belle asked.

"Well it actually feels like it's attached to the rest of my body now, so that's good." he replied. "Are we at two questions or three for the day now?" Belle laughed.

"I told you – we're not counting questions today. We don't count them on my day off." Belle said.

"I never agreed to that." Gold said.

"And I never agreed to spending half of my night on your bathroom floor holding your hair back while you vomited up everything but your shoes. But I did it anyway." Belle said. Gold was quiet. "I'm going to draw you a nice warm bath, that should make you feel quite well. While you're in there I'll set out a fresh pair of pajamas and undergarments and one of your bathrobes for you, the day is almost gone and there's no point in going through the charade of putting on a suit as if you're going to get anything done, whatever it is that you do. I'll get the mail and I can either bring it up to you or if you're feeling up to it you can come down to the living room and look at it there." Belle said. She stood up and walked out of the room and into the bathroom, and Gold just watched her silently. He struggled to recall the events of the prior evening; the last thing he remembered was leaving Bae's room and going back into the study. She'd always been bold and unafraid with him, but not like this. What the bloody hell happened last night, he wondered.

* * *

Belle walked into the foyer with Gold's mail; he had received several newspapers, two business magazines, and about three large envelopes, none of which had a return address. Belle was just about to take them upstairs when she saw Gold coming down the stairs; he was wearing the pajamas he took out for him, as well as the bathrobe and a pair of slippers that he must have retrieved himself. "I think I'll take those in the living room, Miss Woods." Gold said as he finished coming down the stairs. Belle followed him into the living room and he sat back on the sofa. She handed him the pile of mail. "Thank you." he said. He reached to turn on the lamp next to the sofa and began leafing through his mail. Belle just stood there and stared at him. "That will be all, Miss Woods."

"Nothing else you need then?" Belle asked. Gold looked up at her.

"I know it's your day off but if you would be so kind, my dinner will arrive promptly at 6:30 and I would like to eat it, you don't get to have that meal, it's one I look forward to every week." Gold said. "I would greatly appreciate it if you would bring it to me in here."

"Of course." Belle said. "Anything else?"

"Yes. You called me Ian – twice today. Why?" he asked. Belle smirked at him.

"Because you asked me to last night. I'll be back at 6:30 with your dinner." Belle said, and she flitted out of the room. Gold put his hands up to his face and sighed. Oh good god, what else did he ask her? What else did he SAY to her? This was all her fault – if she hadn't tried to be nice to him, this never would have happened. He should have known that girl would be nothing but trouble from the moment he first spoke with her. Enough to drive a man bloody mad, he thought to himself. And worst of all, he wasn't going to see her again until 6:30 – and that was four hours away. And he would miss her every minute of those four hours. He hated it when Emma Swan was right.

* * *

Belle entered the living room at 6:30 carrying the tray that was delivered. Gold had been engrossed in reading the entire time – when he wasn't thinking about Belle and trying to piece together the events of the night prior, which he was certain were embarrassing as hell, and he still couldn't recall one damn thing that had happened between going back into the study and waking up with Belle sitting on the edge of his bed smiling at him all chipper and stunningly beautiful and offering him a hangover remedy that she should really bottle and sell because she could make millions off of it. "Just set it on the coffee table." Gold said, and he sat up. He dove toward the tray and opened it up. Belle looked down at it and made a face.

"What is that?" she asked.

"Haggis." he said. "I need silverware, could you please get me some? A napkin would be good too – and some more water, if you wouldn't mind." Belle went into the kitchen and came back with what he had asked for. "Thank you." Gold said, and he began to eat his dinner.

"Well you certainly wouldn't have to worry about me eating that slop." Belle commented. Gold looked up at her.

"And what exactly is considered a delicacy in your homeland? Barbeque kangaroo?" he quipped.

"I've had kangaroo meat, it's not bad. Better than THAT." Belle said. "Glad you don't have me make this for you, I don't think I could manage."

"I wouldn't even ask you to attempt it. And actually – this is imported from Scotland. I have it every Tuesday. It's quite illegal here in the states, actually. I just happen to have connections to maneuver around those particulars." Gold said.

"Why is it illegal?" Belle asked.

"I don't know, some ridiculous agriculture law. No matter, I've been getting it sent here for twenty years and no one's caught on. And given other matters in my life I seriously doubt that smuggled haggis is what's going to get me sent to prison." Gold said.

"What other matters?" Belle asked.

"None that concern you, Princess." Gold replied. "You may go, I think I can manage to clean up after myself."

"Feeling better then?" Belle asked.

"Very much, yes." Gold replied. "By the way – how did you know so much about the um – aftercare of – well, a night of a bit too much indulgence?"

"I had two roommates in college. One of them was a chemistry major and she's the one who came up with the hangover concoction. The other was pre-med, and she fully instructed me on the best way to take care of someone who had a bit more than a bit too much to drink, mainly because she was quite the lush at the parties we went to and wanted to make sure she didn't choke on her own vomit. I've never been much of a drinker, so needless to say I was frequently the designated driver and hair holder over the toilet bowl and quite a few other things. So last night was – a bit like – reliving my youth." Belle said. Gold glared at her. He had finished his dinner and he sat back on the sofa. He reached into the end table drawer and pulled out a remote just as Belle was leaving the room. Belle was startled when a panel over the fireplace opened, and a large screen television appeared. "What the bloody hell is that?" she asked as he flipped on the TV. "You have a television in here!"

"It's 2013 Princess, everyone has a television." Gold replied.

"Well why didn't I know this?" Belle asked.

"Because I didn't tell you." he replied. He turned on a news station. Belle turned and went back into the room. She sat down on the opposite end of the sofa, and stretched her feet across his. Gold looked down at her legs. "What in the hell are you doing?" he asked.

"I haven't seen the news in almost six weeks, I'd like to know what's going on in the world if you don't mind." Belle said.

"What's going on? People are killing other people, some celebrity is embroiled in a ridiculous scandal, and you're sitting on my sofa sprawled out with your legs on my lap as if they belong there." Gold said.

"Shhh." Belle said, waving him off and listening intently to the news. Gold angrily turned off the television. "Hey – I was watching that!" Belle said. Gold grabbed her legs and shoved them off of himself.

"Enough of this. You've had your fun at my expense, Miss Woods. I behaved like an ass last night and I apologize. I shouldn't have gotten that upset over the dessert, and I shouldn't have screamed at you. Now – what in the bloody hell happened last night after you came upstairs? I want full details." Belle looked at him and smiled.

"Tell you what. I'll make you a deal. You can ask me one question per day about what happened last night, and I will answer it honestly, and I believe you've had one answered today already. Eventually, between the answers I give and the flashes of memory that you're bound to start having, you should be able to piece it all together. And when you do – then we'll talk." Belle said. "I'm a bit tired and I think I'm going to turn in early this evening. I'll see you in the morning – I'll wear my blue uniform tomorrow – I think it goes well with my pretty blue eyes, don't you? Goodnight, Ian." Belle said, and she sauntered out of the room.


	8. Chapter 8

_As always, thank you for the kind feedback! (Which might not be so kind at the end of this one. :/) I can't tell you how much it means to me! _

_I do not own 'Once Upon a Time.'_

**_Chapter 8_**

Belle entered the dining room the next morning, a huge smile planted across her face as she set Gold's breakfast in front of him. "Good morning, Ian." she said in a happy tone of voice. "How are you feeling today?" Gold glared at her but did not answer. "Did you sleep well?" she asked. He still did not reply. She poured him his coffee and sat down next to him as he ate his breakfast in silence. "Do you have busy day today? I mean, I'm sure you do since you missed an entire day of work yesterday doing whatever it is that you do." Gold continued to ignore her. "You know, the questions don't count if you don't answer them."

"Miss Woods – how much longer are you going to play this game with me?" Gold asked tersely.

"I'm not playing a game, Ian. I'm merely asking you questions." Belle replied.

"Stop calling me that." Gold said. Belle smirked at him.

"I don't think I will. You told me to call you Ian and I prefer that to Mr. Gold, it's so formal. Besides it's a nice name, Ian. By the way – you really don't have to call me Miss Woods. I mean, first of all, that isn't my name, and second I know you don't like it nor do you like the name Lacey. I know I'm in hiding and under protection but – well, when it's just the two of us – I really would rather you call me Belle. If you don't mind." Belle said.

"How do you know I don't like the name Lacey?" Gold asked.

"Well, you told me, of course." Belle said.

"What else did I tell you?" Gold asked.

"Oh – lots of things. But you only get one question per day and they really do need to be more specific than that." Belle said, and she stood up. "Better get going on the laundry – do want me to clean up the mess in your study today, I should have time."

"What mess?" Gold asked.

"You haven't looked? Oh, it's quite a wreck, even worse than your last fit. Do you have things shipped in to have around to break or do you have a stash of them in a hidden room somewhere?" Belle asked. Gold stood up.

"I will take care of the study, Miss Woods. In fact – I'll be in there all day. Please leave my meals at the door and do not bother me." Gold said.

"Whatever you like, Ian. Have a lovely day – I'll see you tomorrow then." Belle said. She picked up his breakfast plate and headed into the kitchen. Gold watched her longingly as she did so, then took a deep breath and headed upstairs.

* * *

Gold stood in the middle of his study assessing the damage. He sighed in disgust at himself. He looked over at the nearly empty bottle of whiskey sitting on the table. Good lord, he drank nearly a whole bottle, no wonder he couldn't remember a damn thing. He sat down on the sofa and sighed once again, then heard a noise from behind.

"Jesus Gold, what happened here? Don't tell me you went on another bender, do you remember what happened last time?" Emma said as she entered the room through the hidden door.

"No, actually I don't, although you seem to enjoy reminding me every chance you get." Gold said.

"So what happened this time?" Emma asked, sitting down next to him.

"That, Miss Swan, is what I'd like to know. Unfortunately, my maid seems to want to make a game out of divulging that information." Gold said.

"Oh good god – any idea what you might have said to her?" Emma asked. "Cause the last time you poured out your guts and said stuff to me that I had NO desire to find out."

"I asked her to start calling me Ian. And I told her that I don't like the name Lacey Woods. That's all I've managed to uncover so far." Gold said. "She also mentioned holding my hair back while I vomited into the toilet."

"Oh, great, she and I have something to bond over then." Emma said, and she took out her phone.

"Who are you calling?" Gold asked.

"Dr. Hopper." Emma replied.

"I don't need to talk to Hopper." Gold said, grabbing the phone from her. "What I need is for us to solve this problem so that that girl can leave my house."

"Seriously? I have seen you make the most ruthless criminals almost cry while getting them to reveal secrets, and you can't get some little heiress librarian from New York to tell you what you did when you drunk off your ass? You've got it bad, don't you?" Emma asked.

"We have work to do, Miss Swan." Gold said.

"Yeah, you're damn right we do. And we can't afford this sort of thing. Didn't I tell you what a really bad idea it would be if you and little miss sunshine out there were to -"

"We are doing nothing." Gold said.

"How do you know you didn't?" Emma teased. Gold glared at her.

"Go in the other room, Miss Swan. I'll be right there." he said. Emma exited the room through the hidden door, and Gold began to pace a bit. They couldn't have. Could they?

* * *

Belle greeted Gold in the same upbeat manner as the morning before when she brought his breakfast to him. "Good morning, Ian." Belle said. "I trust you had a good day yesterday. Will you be spending the day in your study again?"

"No." Gold replied.

"You look very nice today, by the way. I like that color on you." Belle said. Gold was wearing a bright red shirt under his black suit, with a black tie.

"Miss Woods, I would really appreciate it if you would not do this to me." Gold said.

"I'm not doing anything to you, Ian; I'm just being nice." Belle said. Gold took a deep breath.

"Miss Woods – did I do anything – inappropriate to you the other night?" Gold asked. Belle smiled and sat down. She put her hand on his.

"You didn't do or say anything that offended me, Ian. I promise."

"That's not an answer. You know damn well what I was asking." Gold said, her hand still on his.

"You were very drunk, Ian. That – wasn't even a possibility. You could barely stand up, let alone – that." Belle said. "That's what you've been worried about?" Gold looked down, embarrassed, and he began to eat his breakfast. Belle moved away from him, stood up, and went into the kitchen. She came back out just as Gold was getting up to leave the table. Belle approached him.

"Ian – wait." Belle said. She reached out and grabbed his hand. "I'll stop teasing, I know it's upsetting you and I don't want to be cruel. I like you – very much. You're complicated, but I think you're a very nice man deep down, no matter what you say or how you act to the contrary. But I think you're a very troubled man, and I wish I understood why because I'd like to help. If you ever decide that you want to let me in – all you have to do is ask." Gold stood quiet for a moment, looking down the entire time she was talking. Belle waited for a response from him for several minutes after she finished, and he said nothing, but did not pull away from her touch. Finally, Belle let go of his hand and moved away.

"I don't like the name Lacey." Gold said, and Belle turned around. "You're right."

"I don't either." Belle said.

"I suppose that – in private – calling one another by our given names won't be a bad thing. Belle." Gold said.

"I'd like that. Ian." Belle said.

"I'd – like to show you something. Belle." Gold said. "Come with me." They went into the living room.

"You already showed me the television, Ian." Belle said.

"I know – and I want you to know that you may use it whenever you like, as long as all of your work is done and I'm not watching anything, which I really don't do much." Gold said.

"Thank you. I'm not much of a television person either, I prefer reading, but – it'll be nice to have something to do with my free time." Belle said.

"Yes, well – perhaps this will – make up for the way I've been acting." Gold said. There was a door next to the fireplace, but it was locked. Belle assumed it was decorative and didn't really think much about it. Gold approached the door and pulled out a key, unlocking it, then opened the door. He stepped inside, and Belle followed. Gold reached over to the wall and flipped a light switch. It was an entire library of books, stacked almost to the ceiling. The room was filled with nothing but dust, cobwebs, and books. Hundreds and hundreds of books. Belle gazed around the room in awe.

"It's – it's beautiful." Belle said.

"It's yours." Gold said. He took the key off his ring and handed it to her. "I haven't used it in years, but – I thought you might like it. Now keep in mind, if this room is going to be in use I do expect it to be cleaned, I don't want to see one speck of dust in here. Thursday is your least busy day so you can add that to your tasks. I don't expect it to be cleaned in one day, I know it'll take several weeks, but I do expect it to be spotless eventually." Belle threw her arms around Gold and hugged him tightly.

"Thank you." she said. Gold stood frozen in his place as she hugged him. Belle held onto him for several minutes. Gold mindlessly straightened his jacket and tie once she let him go.

"Alright – you've dilly-dallied enough. Back to work." Gold said, and he left the room. Belle watched him leave, smiling the entire time.

* * *

Several days passed and Monday approached. That Monday marked one week since Gold's drunken evening, since his revelation of his feelings to Belle, and since her discovery of the contents of the west wing, which she had said nothing to him about. At Emma's urging, Gold set up another appointment with Dr. Hopper while Belle was out shopping. They sat in the living room talking.

"So you don't have any real memory of what happened that night? No flashes or anything?" Dr. Hopper asked.

"Nothing." Gold replied. "I don't think I've ever been that drunk, to be honest. And I've had some pretty bad benders as you know, but – this was a complete blackout. It's been a week and I have absolutely no memory whatsoever."

"Maybe you don't want to remember. Have you considered that?" Hopper asked.

"I have." Gold replied. "I think that I – may have made advances toward her."

"And she didn't like that?" Hopper asked.

"On the contrary. I think she did. Which I do not understand at all, I mean – look at me. There's not much about me to love, is there?" Gold said.

"Well – maybe Miss Woods sees you differently than you see yourself." Hopper said. "I'd really like to meet her; I only saw her in passing that one time."

"Well she's not here." Gold said. "And I'm not sure that would be a good idea." Gold heard the doorbell ring and he stood up. "Excuse me – I'm expecting a delivery, I'll be right back." Gold went to the door and opened it. Belle was standing there holding several bags. "What are you doing?"

"Couldn't find my key, I'm sorry, I think I dropped it, I'll go look for it." Belle said, setting the bags down in the hallway. "There's more in the car, can you keep the door open, I'll be right back." Dr. Hopper came out into the hallway.

"Need some help?" Hopper asked. "Hi, I'm – Archie Hopper." he said, extending his hands.

"Lacey Woods. Nice to meet you." Belle said. Gold gripped his cane handle nervously.

"Archie is a – business associate of mine." Gold said.

"Right – you were here before, I remember seeing you." Belle said, not letting on that she knew who he was and why he was there. "And I really could use that help if you wouldn't mind."

"Of course." Hopper said, and he went outside to the car with Belle as Gold watched uncomfortably.

"Found my keys." Belle said as they came back in. "You can just set everything down, I'll take care of it. Thank you."

"Not a problem." Hopper said. "So – Gold do you want to get back to our meeting?"

"No, I think we're done." Gold said. "I'll call you if – anything changes."

"Okay. Just keep me posted." Hopper said, and he left. Belle was going back and forth, taking bags into the kitchen. Gold followed her on her last trip.

"Would you like some help unloading these?" he asked.

"If you want." Belle said. Gold helped her open the bags and stock the refrigerator and pantry.

"You're earlier than usual." Gold said.

"I'm getting faster at shopping now that I know the stores. I really don't want to be in town longer than I have to be, those people are awful." Belle said.

"Belle, I know that it's not been easy for you. And I know that you wanted to make friends, but – this is for the best, you understand that, right?" Gold asked.

"I suppose." Belle replied, and she stopped and looked at him. "I just don't think Ruby would the type to – I just think she's a regular person. It would have been nice to have a friend during all of this."

"Belle – regular people are the ones that should be the most suspect. Do you honestly think that no one is out there looking for you? They are. And it's not going to be someone who's obvious that finds you. Like I said – no one is above reproach. You have to be extremely cautious – the most unlikely person could, in fact, be the one person that you should fear." Gold said.

* * *

Dr. Archie Hopper sat in his office, talking on the phone. "Yeah – it's definitely her." he said to the person on the other end. Hopper looked down at a photo lying on his desk – it was a photo of Belle as she looked before she went into hiding, with her blonde hair. "They had her hair colored but – there's no doubt that it's her. He has feelings for her – he's in love with her. She's his weakness – I think you may have finally found a way to take him out as well."


	9. Chapter 9

_Wow, so much feedback for that last chapter! And that little cliffhanger from last time will be dealt with . . . eventually. BTW, I am changing the rating for this story to 'T'. I just think it should be that and not K+. _

_I do not own 'Once Upon a Time.'_

**_Chapter 9_**

Belle spent her entire day off engrossed in reading; the library that Gold gave her contained more books than she could possibly read in a lifetime, and she was determined to devour as many of them as possible. She spent her day in the living room reading, since he said she could use the room as long as he wasn't in there.

Belle poured through three books by the time it was nearing 6:30, not even stopping for lunch. When she finally started to get hungry, she went into the kitchen to make herself a quick dinner. She took her plate out to the dining room; Gold was at the table, enjoying his dinner.

"May I join you?" Belle asked.

"Please." Gold replied, and Belle sat down next to him. She glanced at his plate.

"That stuff again?" Belle asked.

"Yes. It is Tuesday." Gold replied.

"What is that with it?" Belle asked.

"Neeps and tatties." Gold replied. Belle gave him a look of puzzlement. "It's Scottish for turnips and potatoes."

"Then why don't you just say turnips and potatoes?" Belle asked.

"Would you prefer I start using some slang that you would better comprehend? Perhaps a phrase from Down Under, such as, 'Belle can be quite annoying with her constant earbashing.'" Gold teased.

"I am not always talking!" Belle said, offended.

"How about we make a deal, just to prove my point? Tomorrow – you can't say one word to me. An entire day without any chatter from you." Gold said.

"And what do I get from this deal?" Belle asked. Gold thought about it for a moment.

"I will answer, truthfully, one question that falls under one of the three categories that you were told you can't ask about." Gold said. Belle pondered the idea for a moment.

"Alright. Deal." Belle said.

"There's more than just that. That's what you get if you manage to last the entire day. If you don't – then you tell me the most embarrassing thing that occurred the evening of my – indiscretion." Gold said.

"Me holding you over the toilet while you vomited wasn't bad enough?" Belle asked.

"Unfortunately, my dear, you aren't the first person to do that. So no." Gold said. "And I know there was something else that you're not telling me. So – do we have a deal?"

"Yes. We have a deal." Belle replied.

"Well then. I'll look forward to seeing – and not hearing – you tomorrow." Gold said.

* * *

The next morning, Gold was waiting at the breakfast table when Belle entered the room. "Good morning, Belle." Gold said. "Oh, that's right – you can't say anything today. Too bad – I feel, um – extra talkative this morning." Belle set his plate down in front of him and turned to leave. "Going somewhere? I was hoping you'd join me this morning, I'm starting to enjoy your company." Belle sighed as she went back into the kitchen. Just to prove he wasn't bothering her, she made herself a plate and sat down with him. "You forgot my coffee." he said. Belle smirked at him, went into the kitchen, got his coffee, poured it for him, then sat back down. "So – I noticed the books you were reading yesterday. You're a mystery fan, are you? I enjoy them myself. I'm not that avid of a reader, at least not as much as you, but – that's always been my favorite genre." Belle looked up at him and smiled, then went back to eating her breakfast. "You know – I've been meaning to tell you that I haven't been all that satisfied with the way you've been ironing and folding my bedding; it's too wrinkled. Perhaps I should watch over your work today – you know, supervise, make sure you're doing it right, Mrs. Potts was very particular with what she did. In fact – I really don't have much going on today, I could actually help you with the laundry if you'd like. Would you like my help? Oh, that's right, you can't tell me, so I'm going to assume that yes, you do. We'll finally see once and for all what you've been doing right and wrong." Belle shot him a glare, then picked up her dish and stomped angrily out of the room. Gold smiled to himself. She was definitely going to crack – there was no way she'd be able to put up with this all day without saying something. It was driving him mad not knowing what had happened that night, and if this was the only way to find out – then so be it.

Gold continued pestering Belle throughout the entire day. He followed her as she did her work, critiqued everything she did, and Belle held her tongue the entire time. Gold was impressed – he was certain she'd have cracked by lunchtime if not sooner. What if she didn't? Then he'd have to come up with another way to get this bloody woman to talk. He kept at it, becoming more and more annoying as the day progressed. But Belle didn't give in. She didn't say one word to him.

* * *

The next morning, Gold sat nervously at the breakfast table, awaiting the inevitable. She had won. He lost. He wasn't happy about that, but at the same time he was fascinated by her ability to remain steadfast the entire day. Then again – he was fascinated by everything about her. And this little challenge only made that fact all the more true.

Belle entered the dining room with a pot of coffee, and she poured some into his cup and set the coffee pot down onto the table. "I'm assuming my breakfast is coming then." He looked down at his watch. "It's 7:34; you're late." Gold said to her. Belle ignored his comment and went back into the kitchen, then came out with his plate and set it down in front of him. She stood and watched him with her arms crossed as he ate. After several minutes, he looked up at her. "Alright – you've earned your question. Let's get it over with." Gold said. Belle didn't say a word; she just kept staring at him. "I'm waiting." he said.

"Why are you such a jackass?" Belle asked, her arms still crossed.

"Well, that's not the question that I expected but – alright. Yes. I'm a jackass. Always have been, always will be. I wish I could tell you why, but – I'm not really sure. Perhaps I was simply born that way."

"No you weren't. You can be nice - when it suits you. You were deliberately rude and annoying yesterday and the only reason was that you wanted to break me. You were actively trying to break me, it was almost as if you've done the same without effort, hundreds of times. You have, haven't you? You work for them – with Miss Swan, with the FBI." Belle said.

"You've already had your question answered. I have things to do." Gold said. He stood up and turned to leave. Belle grabbed his arm.

"Don't you walk away from me, Ian." Belle said, and Gold turned around. "You want to know what you did so badly that night? What was so embarrassing? Fine." Belle moved close to him and planted a kiss on his lips as Gold stood stoic. "You did THAT. You told me I was pretty. Then beautiful. And you told me that you couldn't have me because you'd only end up hurting me. And you may not remember that you did that and you said that, but that doesn't mean that you don't feel it, because I know you do. And you know what, Ian? So do I. I think you're very handsome. On the days that you're choosing to actually be a decent human being, all I want to do is be with you. And there is so much I want to know about you. I've told you that you can let me in, but you won't. I didn't want to tell you because I was hoping you'd actually admit your feelings in time, but no. You'd rather just play games and be kind and sweet and give me a library one day and then act like a bloody jackass the next day. I'm not some criminal that you're trying to break, Ian. I'm here because I have to be. I didn't ask for the feelings I have any more than you did but there they are. So you need to make a choice – are you going to deal with them? Or are you going to be a coward and run away from them?" Belle asked. Gold stared at her, not saying a word. Then he turned and left the room. Belle sighed, fighting back tears.

* * *

Belle took Gold's lunch to his office that day, but he was not there. He didn't instruct her that he was going to be elsewhere, but the only other place she presumed he would be was in his study. She hoped he wasn't drinking again. She hadn't heard anything crashing though, so she assumed this wasn't the case.

Belle headed upstairs and sure enough, he was in his study. He was at his spinning wheel. Belle set the tray down on the coffee table. "You weren't in your office; thought you might be here." Belle said. Gold didn't look up or say anything. Belle was about to leave, but turned around and walked toward him instead. "I'm sorry, Ian." Belle said, putting her hand on his shoulder. Gold stopped spinning. "I just couldn't hold it in any longer. I'm sorry." Gold looked down, ignoring her. She could feel him trembling. Belle sat down in front of him on the stool attached to his spinning wheel. She put her hand on his leg. "Ian, please talk to me. We can't go on like this. Not anymore. At least I can't." Belle moved toward him, and he did the same. They inched their lips close to one another and then they kissed. It was a soft, gentle, loving kiss. Gold was trembling when Belle pulled away from him. "There's nothing to be afraid of, Ian. I promise." Belle said, and she left the room.

* * *

Gold wasn't in the dining room at 6:30 for his dinner. Belle waited for him. And he never came into the dining room. Frustrated, Belle went looking for him. She saw the light on in the living room and peeked inside. Gold was sitting on the sofa, staring at the fireplace as it crackled in front of him. Belle entered the room and sat down next to him. "Your dinner's getting cold." Belle said.

"Not hungry." Gold whispered. Belle moved close to him and put her hand on his knee.

"Go away, Belle. I don't want to talk right now." Gold said, and Belle pulled away. She got up and left the room.

* * *

The next day, there was an awkward silence between them the entire morning. Neither of them said a word or even looked at one another. Each of them went about their day in silence. Late in the afternoon, the doorbell rang. Gold went to answer, and Emma quickly pushed her way inside. "Where is she?" Emma asked.

"Probably in the kitchen." Gold replied. Emma grabbed his arm and dragged him into the living room. "Miss Swan, what are you -"

"Shhh." Emma said, and she began to search the room diligently. When she looked under the coffee table, and grabbed something that was under it. She pulled it out and showed it to Gold. It was a bug. Emma threw it on the floor and crushed it. "Hopper." Emma said. Gold's eyes widened.

"What?" Gold said.

"There was suspicious activity in his bank account." Emma said. Gold began to fume.

"You told me he had clearance. You ran a full, comprehensive check on him!" Gold shouted, his voice rising.

"Keep your voice down!" Emma said quietly. "And I did. Something must have come up since. Someone got to him."

"I just think you're getting sloppy. Maybe you're a bit too close to this case." Gold said.

"Like you're not." Emma retorted. "Nolan's coming in with a crew to sweep the rest of the house, they'll be here in ten minutes. I'll keep her occupied while they do that. I'll meet you at ten tomorrow upstairs; I'm gonna start looking for another place for her to go."

"What do you mean, another place?" Gold asked.

"Well she can't stay here now. The situation's been compromised, it's not safe. You want me to tell her? Or do you want to do it?" Emma asked. A pained look came across Gold's face. "Oh for god's sake, Gold – something happened between you two, didn't it? Well make it un-happen. Maybe with her out of the house you'll actually get your crap together and be on the ball."

"I'm not the one who hired Hopper." Gold said.

"He was cleared. Like I said – someone got to him. You didn't pick up on any of that? From any of his questions? You're slipping – she's distracting you." Emma said. "It may take a week or so to get another setup for her – in the meantime I'm beefing up security here and you need to start thinking with your brain instead of your -"

"That's enough, Miss Swan." Gold said. "And don't worry about things with my maid – I'll take care of it."

"Yeah, you better." Emma said.

"You're in no position to be giving orders, Miss Swan. Remember who's in charge here." Gold said.

"Then start acting like it." Emma said, and she stormed out of the room.

* * *

That evening, Gold ate his dinner quietly. Belle remained silent around him until she could keep quiet no longer. "I had a nice talk with Emma today." Belle said. "She's going to get me some more clothes." Gold didn't respond to her. Belle sat down at the table. "Ian – I think we need to talk about this. About – yesterday." Gold finished his tea and set the cup down – it was the chipped cup that he had used every day since Belle dropped it. Gold stood up and Belle did the same.

"That will be all." Gold said. "I'll clean up."

"Ian – please. Just talk to me." Belle said.

"You're fired, Miss Woods." Gold said. Belle looked at him in shock.

"I'm – I'm what?" Belle asked angrily. "You can't fire me, I don't even technically work for you, this so-called job is just a ruse that I've agreed to go along with."

"I don't need you anymore, dearie. I've asked Miss Swan to have you transferred elsewhere, and she is looking for another safe place for you. Until then, you are to remain in your quarters. You can use the kitchen an hour after I have finished my meals, and the rest of the house is off-limits to you. Miss Swan will be here to escort you to your new residence once it is acquired." Gold said. He turned to leave. Belle walked up behind him and grabbed him, forcing him to turn around.

"You look at me and tell me that kiss meant nothing to you." Belle said. Gold stared directly at her.

"It meant nothing." Gold said, gritting his teeth.

"You're lying. You were freeing yourself from whatever has cursed you to this existence for the past two decades. I know you love me, Ian." Belle said.

"That's a lie." Gold said, looking down. Belle moved closer to him, getting in his face.

"You could have had happiness if you'd just believed that someone could want you." Belle said.

"You're a coward, Ian. You've made your choice. And you're going to regret it. Because all you'll have now, is an empty heart, and a chipped cup." Gold stood stoic as Belle turned and left the room. Gold waited a few moments after she had gone, and he picked the teacup up and went up the stairs. He entered his study and sat down on the sofa, the cup in his hand. He looked at it for several minutes, then began to sob for nearly ten minutes. He then took a deep breath and set the cup down. Gold stood up and walked over to the painting that his stash of liquor was hidden behind. He pulled the painting back, reached for a bottle, opened it, and took a long drink.


	10. Chapter 10

_Got one more done - this story is eating my life, I swear! But in a good way. :) _

_Thank you for the feedback and to all of you who are reading - I am truly overwhelmed and humbled by your response! Things are about to get pretty intense as the story proceeds - hope you like the journey I'm about to embark on here!_

_I do not own 'Once Upon a Time.'_

**_Chapter 10_**

Belle leaned back against the headboard of her bed downstairs and sighed. She thought she was getting through to him. She was certain that she was. They had kissed, and it wasn't a drunken kiss nor a kiss demonstrating his foolish behavior. It was real, and tender, and loving. And he didn't pull away, and he didn't react in anger. She thought perhaps he needed some time to process his feelings, but – it was working. She was convinced it was just a matter of time before he opened up to her. Something happened, and she didn't understand what. And now he was demanding that she be relegated to living in the basement for a week? Not bloody likely if she had anything to say about it. Maybe he would cool off by tomorrow, and then she'd talk to him.

After sulking for a bit of time, Belle ventured upstairs into the kitchen to get something to drink. Once she got to the top of the stairs, she could hear him. Things smashing upstairs in his study. That temper of his was something to behold, and not in a good way. Belle thought it was likely due to his isolation for so long. She tried to ignore the noise, but her concern for him got the better of her. She knew what happened the last time he was like that, and she didn't want him to harm himself. His rules be damned; she was going up there to have it out with the beast once and for all.

* * *

Gold raged as he swung his cane around. He slammed it across the fireplace mantle, knocking every little knick knack that sat upon it to the ground. He picked up random items off of the tables and threw them down, shattering anything that was breakable. He erupted until there was nothing in the room left to break; the only item remaining was the little chipped cup. Gold picked it up and looked at it. He stared at it for a moment, then put it back down on the table. He picked up the bottle of whiskey, which was almost halfway gone, and took a drink, just as Belle entered the room. "I thought I told you to STAY DOWNSTAIRS!" Gold shouted as he turned to face her. He moved toward her, his cane in one hand and the bottle of whiskey in the other. He picked up his cane and waved it near her face. "Get. Out." he said angrily. Belle looked down at the bottle in his hand.

"Well at least you haven't drunk the entire bottle like you did the last time." Belle said.

"I'm working on it." Gold said, and he took another drink. Belle lunged at him and put her hand on the bottle. Gold fought with her for it, and in their struggle the bottle crashed to the floor and shattered into pieces, alcohol spilling everywhere. "That – was imported Scottish whiskey. Do you know how much that cost me?"

"Do you know how much it would have cost you if you'd finished it tonight? You can't keep drinking like that, you're playing Russian roulette with your life. It's going to kill you one of these days, Ian." Belle said.

"Maybe that's what I want, did you ever think of that, Princess?" Gold asked.

"Well it's not going to happen tonight." Belle said.

"I have more." Gold replied, and he started to walk toward the painting where he kept his alcohol. Belle followed him and grabbed his arm as he opened the hidden wall compartment.

"Don't push me. You have no idea what I'm capable of." Gold said furiously.

"You won't hurt me. You don't have it in you." Belle told him. Gold got in her face; Belle could smell the alcohol on his breath.

"Why did you come up here?" he asked.

"I wasn't going to. But I heard you downstairs – and I wasn't going to let you hurt yourself, either. I care too much about you to let that happen." Belle said.

"Stop saying that!" Gold shouted at her.

"Why?" Belle asked.

"Because no one – no one could ever love me!" he screamed as he shoved her back into the wall. He pushed her back and held her there, fuming and breathing heavily as he trembled.

"What would Bae think, if he could see you like this?" Belle asked, looking him directly in the eye. "Would he be proud of his father?"

"How do know about Bae? Who told you about him!?" Gold screamed, holding her back against the wall.

"You did." Belle replied. Gold gasped and backed away from her. "You said you were afraid you were going to lose me – just like you lost Bae." Belle said. Gold moved away from her and began to pace, looking down at the ground. "I was in the west wing. I saw his room." Gold turned around and moved back toward her.

"You what? You were told NEVER to go in there!" he screamed.

"The light was on, the door was open, and you were passed out drunk and I just wanted to turn off the lights!" Belle screamed back at him. A pained look came over Gold's face; he turned and moved away from her. Gold sat down on the sofa, put his face in his hands, and softly began to sob. Belle watched him for several minutes. She took a deep breath, and then went to sit next to him. She reached out her hand and put it on his leg.

"You lost your son, didn't you?" she asked in a whisper of a voice. Gold nodded.

"My Bae. My beautiful boy." Gold whimpered, and he sat up and looked at Belle, tears streaming down his face. Belle reached her arms out to him and he melted into her arms as he continued to sob. Belle held him close and soothingly ran her fingers through his hair.

"Do you want to tell me about it?" Belle asked. Gold sniffled a bit, and tried his best to pull himself together as he sat up to look at her.

"I didn't protect him. I protected everyone else – but I didn't protect him." Gold said. "And now he's gone. Belle simply looked at him with nothing but love and empathy across her face. "And now I didn't protect you. I failed, Belle. I failed." He began to sob again, and she pulled him into another hug.

"What do you mean? I'm here; I'm fine." Belle said.

"No. You don't understand." Gold said, pulling away from her. "You've been compromised. And it's my fault. I let my feelings for you get the better of me. I let them distract me. And you're no longer safe here."

"You do love me then?" Belle asked. Gold reached out and touched her cheek.

"Yes. I love you. And that's why you must go." Gold said. "I thought if you were angry at me – it would be easier."

"For whom? Not for me. Obviously not for you." Belle said. "You're drunk again, aren't you?"

"Yeah." Gold replied.

"Well you're not slurring your words that much yet; let's try and get you sobered up, okay?" Belle asked. Gold nodded in agreement. "Come on – let's get you to your room, you'll be more comfortable there than in this mess." Gold and Belle both stood up and Belle put her arm around him. He wasn't staggering this time, but she could tell that he was feeling the effects of the whiskey just the same. They reached the bedroom and approached his bed, and sat down on the edge of it.

"I'm going to go downstairs and get you some water and something to settle your stomach so that you don't get sick. Do you think you can manage getting dressed for bed while I do that?" Belle asked.

"Why? Was I unable to do that last time?" Gold asked. Belle smirked at him.

"You couldn't even sit up on the bed without me holding you up." Belle told him.

"Well I'm drunk but not that far gone this time." Gold said. "Might even remember tonight's events."

"I hope so. I'll be back." Belle said, and she left the room. When she came back upstairs, Gold was sitting on the edge of his bed, dressed in his pajamas, his forehead resting in his hands. "Here." Belle said, offering him a bottle of water. "This will help dilute the alcohol, your headache won't be as bad tomorrow."

"Thank you." Gold said, and he drank the water.

"I've got some pepto for you as well – do you feel sick at all?" Belle asked.

"No. Not yet." Gold replied.

"Well this should settle your stomach, might even help avoid that happening." Belle said, and she gave him a dose of the pink medicine, which he took without argument.

"Did you try to get me to take this that night?" Gold asked.

"Well I got you to drink a bit of water before you passed out but not much. And it was a bit too late for the medicine by the time I came up here." Belle said. She stood up and pulled the covers back on his bed. "Come on – lie down." Belle said. Gold lay back in the bed.

"Stay with me?" he asked, squeezing her hand.

"Okay." Belle said. "But you better remember in the morning that you asked me to."

"You'll just have to remind me if I don't." Gold said. Belle climbed into bed with him and rested her head on his shoulder.

"I spent the night with you that night." Belle said. Gold started to sit up a bit.

"I thought you said that we didn't -"

"Not like that. I just – slept in the bed with you, you had already passed out. I just wanted to make sure that you didn't get sick, and I couldn't very well do that from the basement. You, um – you rolled on top of me in your sleep. You were drooling on my shirt when I woke up." Belle said.

"Well I'll try not to do that tonight." Gold said. He reached around and put his arm around her, then sighed. "I'm not used to this – phase of things."

"What phase?" Belle asked.

"The point in the evening where I'm drunk enough to feel drunk but not – numb. I usually try to get past that pretty quick." Gold said.

"Is that why you drink? To be numb? To forget?" Belle asked.

"That – and to – not have to deal with things that I'm too cowardly to deal with. Like beautiful girls doing nice things for me or kissing me or – telling me they love me." Gold said.

"Is it so bad to deal with, now?" Belle asked.

"I'm still afraid." Gold admitted. "Because you have to leave. You're not safe here anymore."

"Come with me then." Belle said.

"I can't do that." Gold told her.

"Why not?" Belle asked.

"Belle, please – let's not do this right now, alright? Let's just – enjoy the moment. However many of them we have." Gold said. He sighed and moaned a bit.

"You're getting tired, aren't you?" Belle asked.

"Mmmm." Gold mumbled. Belle sat up.

"Come on – let's get you on your side before you fall asleep."

"I'll be fine." Gold mumbled.

"I don't want you getting sick lying on your back. On your side, Ian, please." Belle said. Gold grumbled as he rolled onto his side.

"Are you always going to be ordering me about now?" Gold asked.

"When I need to, yes." Belle replied, and she lay back down next to him. Belle began to run her fingers through his hair.

"That's nice. I like that." Gold said, and he snuggled up close to her. "I'll try not to drool on you tonight, I promise."

"It's okay. You promise me you're going to remember this, right?" Belle asked.

"I'll remember. I promise." Gold said. He closed his eyes and drifted off to sleep.

* * *

Belle awoke the next morning with Gold snuggled next to her. Belle looked over at the clock – it was almost nine in the morning. Belle began to run her fingers through his hair, and Gold stirred, moaning a bit. "Ian." Belle whispered.

"Hmmm?" Gold responded softly.

"Are you alright?" Belle asked.

"My head hurts." Gold mumbled, and he moved closer to her, resting his head on her shoulder and clinging to her tightly. Belle reached down and kissed his forehead softly. "Do you think you can make me some of that lovely magic potion you gave me the other time?"

"I can do that." Belle said. "You're going to have to let go of me though so I can get up."

"I don't want to." Gold whined.

"Well, you can either let me go and I'll bring you the drink so that you'll feel better, or you can just lie here in my arms and suffer." Belle said.

"Lying in your arms is not suffering, dear." Gold said. Belle smiled.

"You remember what happened last night then." Belle said.

"Mostly." Gold said. "Some of it's fuzzy but – I think that's from the headache. I know what we said to one another."

"I'll go make you that drink and get you some water. My arms will gladly take you back once you've had that." Belle said. Gold grumbled as he pulled away from her. Belle got up and left the room, then came back upstairs with her hangover remedy and a bottle of water. Gold had begun to doze off again while Belle was out of the room. Belle climbed back onto the bed with him and ran her hand across his cheek. "Ian. Let's get you sitting up a bit, alright?" Belle helped him sit up and offered him the drink. Gold took the drink from her and sat back against the headboard. He drank about half of the glass, then turned to look at Belle.

"How do you do that?" Gold asked.

"Do what?" Belle asked.

"Look so beautiful in the morning. I'm sure I don't look anywhere near as good." Gold said.

"Well, for one thing, I wasn't drunk last night, so that really isn't a fair comparison. And second of all, I don't think you look that bad. You certainly don't look as bad as you did last time." Belle said. Gold quietly drank the rest of the glass. "You were planning on getting that drunk again last night, weren't you?"

"Probably." Gold said.

"You have to stop this, Ian. This has to be the last time. Promise me. No more drinking." Belle said.

"I don't know if I can do that, Belle." Gold said.

"Yes you can." Belle said. "You don't need that. You have me now."

"For how long?" Gold asked.

"Forever." Belle said quietly. She kissed him softly on the lips, and he kissed her back.

"Can your arms take me back now? Please?" Gold asked.

"Drink some water first." Gold drank about half of the bottle of water, then put it aside and snuggled back into Belle's arms, sighing with content. "Do you want to go back to sleep for a bit?" Belle asked.

"No. I just want to be with you. My Belle." Gold whispered. He moved his head up a bit until his lips met hers, and he began to kiss her. He reached up and ran his fingers through her hair, and he looked at her and smiled after he pulled his lips away from hers. "You're just so beautiful." Belle smiled back at him, and he snuggled back into her arms quietly.

"We should probably get something to eat. Are you hungry? Is your stomach upset at all?" Belle asked.

"It's fine." Gold said. "I'm not that hungry though. And you don't have to cook for me anymore."

"Why not?" Belle asked.

"Well I did fire you." Gold said. "I don't recall hiring you back last night, either."

"Well I wouldn't want to work for you anymore anyway, you're a horrible boss. Mean, always yelling, and you have these ridiculous routines. Why are you like that, anyway?" Belle asked.

"It was – Mrs. Potts' idea. The routine. It helped me to – cope with things." Gold said.

"When all of this is over, we need to work on getting you back into the world, okay? You're not living, you're existing. I want you to live. Will you try, Ian? I'll be with you, and we'll do this together, okay?" Gold nodded.

"Okay." he replied. He sighed and closed his eyes, and they held one another quietly for some time. After a bit of time had passed, Gold nuzzled Belle and opened his eyes again. "What time is it?" he asked. Belle glanced over at the clock.

"A little past ten." Belle said. "You want to get up now?" Gold quickly sat upright.

"Ten? Oh bloody hell." he said, running his fingers through his hair. "Miss Swan is supposed to meet me at ten."

"I didn't hear the doorbell, she's probably not here yet." Belle said.

"You don't understand, when we have meetings Miss Swan doesn't use the -"

"Gold! I swear if you're passed out from another bender I'm dragging your ass into the shower and turning ice cold water on you!" Emma screamed, her voice getting closer to the bedroom as Gold sat up in bed. "I am not going through this crap with you again and – really?" Emma said, and she stared in shock at Belle sitting up in bed next to Gold, who was sitting up on the edge by the time she got to the room.

"Hi." Belle said quietly.

"You said you were handling this." Emma said.

"I did." Gold said.

"Maybe I wasn't clear enough on the definition of HANDLING." Emma said.

"Miss Swan – I apologize for my tardiness, please go wait for me in the other room." Gold said. Emma just glowered at him angrily. "Now – would a good time for you to go there." Emma skulked out of the room angrily. Belle sat up next to Gold and took his hand.

"You sure you don't want something to eat?" she asked.

"In a bit." Gold replied. "Maybe lunch."

"Do you want your usual meal for today?" Belle asked.

"Yeah." Gold said quietly. Belle kissed him on the cheek.

"I'll bring it up to your study then." Belle said.

"Thank you." he replied.

"I know you're busy – we'll talk more tonight." Belle told him. Gold just nodded. Belle left the room without saying another word.

* * *

Gold got up and took a quick showered and dressed, then went into the study, where Emma was waiting. She was sitting on the sofa, holding the chipped cup in her hands. "Looks like this is the only thing you didn't finish off." Emma said.

"Put that down." Gold said, gritting his teeth. Emma set the cup back down on the table.

"You want to explain what the hell you were doing in there?" Emma asked.

"Not particularly." Gold replied. "We have work to do, Miss Swan."

"Did you tell her?" Emma asked.

"Yes." Gold replied, and he sat down next to Emma. "How much longer will she be here?"

"I've got some feelers out there right now. Maybe a few more days; a week at most." Gold remained quiet. "I called Gwen." Gold looked up at her and sighed.

"Why?" he asked.

"Because you're gonna need her after Belle is gone." Emma said.

"I've been her problem long enough." Gold said. "She should be enjoying her retirement, not worrying about the likes of me."

"Well you can tell her that when she gets here." Emma said. Gold glared at Emma angrily.

"You should have minded your own business." Gold said.

"Well excuse me for giving a crap about you. That woman should be canonized a saint after all she's had to put up with, and she'd have been mad as hell if I didn't let her know what was going on." Emma said. "Are you up for getting some work done or are you too hung over to even try?"

"I'm fine." Gold said. "Let's do this." Emma and Gold both got up and went through the hidden door together.

* * *

That evening at 6:30 p.m., Belle entered the study. Gold was sitting on the sofa, his elbows on his knees and his face buried in his hands. Belle sat down next to him. "Your dinner's ready." Belle said, and she touched him on the shoulder. "You want me to bring it up here?" Gold looked up at her and nodded. "Okay." Belle whispered, and she left the room, then came back with his dinner and set it on the coffee table. Gold sat up and sighed, and began to pick at his food, eating a bit but very hesitantly. "I was supposed to clean in here today but I didn't want to bother you. I'll have time tomorrow."

"You don't have to clean for me anymore. Didn't I fire you?" Gold asked.

"Well, I'm still cooking for you, I might as well clean, at least it's something to do." Belle said. Gold continued to pick at his dinner. "You work with Emma, don't you?" she asked. Gold nodded. "With the FBI?" Gold shook his head.

"Emma's not a fed. We just told you that – thought it would be less – overwhelming." Gold said.

"What is she then?" Belle asked.

"CIA." Gold whispered.

"You work for the CIA?" Belle asked. Gold nodded.

"And MI6. And several other international agencies that no one has ever heard of except for people who work for them."

"So you're what, like – James Bond then?" Belle asked.

"I'm afraid I don't see as much excitement as he does – at least not anymore." Gold said. He set his plate down on the coffee table, having eaten as much as he intended to.

"Something wrong with your dinner?" Belle asked.

"Just not particularly hungry today." he replied. Gold looked up at her. "You don't seem all that surprised by what I just told you."

"Well I knew it had to be something like that. I kind of figured that one out by the end of my first week here, I just didn't say anything." Belle said. Gold chuckled a bit.

"You should be working for the bloody CIA, you're smarter than half of the dimwits I've had to contend with over the years." Gold said.

"So if you're stuck here in this house, and you work from here – where is all your spy gear? I mean – you don't even have a computer. Or a push-button phone, for god's sake." Belle said. Gold looked back at the wall with the hidden door.

"Back there." he said.

"That's a wall, Ian. You're not drinking again, are you?" Belle asked. Gold stood up and ambled over to the wall, then pushed it in.

"Come here." Gold said, and Belle's eyes widened as she followed him into the hidden room.

"Oh my god." Belle said as she looked around. The room was filled with computers and other gadgetry too numerous to count. "So those days that you were shut up here working you were -"

"I do surveillance – on a national and international level. I speak seven languages fluently – French, German, Italian, Russian, Spanish and Japanese. I have a higher security clearance than some heads of state." Gold said. "The woman you saw, Regina Mills – the syndicate she works for isn't some little mob operation centered here in the states. It's a whole international criminal consortium. I've been closing in on discovering their leadership for some time now, but it's just never come to fruition. They're always two steps ahead of me somehow. It's like they know my every move, and I can't figure out why. It's driving me mad. And to top it all off – there was a plant, a snitch right under my nose. And I didn't figure it out – because I was distracted by a pretty girl with blue eyes, a curious nature, and an accent that I won't soon forget." Gold turned to leave the room, and Belle followed him. He closed the hidden door after they both entered the study. Gold sat back down on the sofa, and Belle joined him. She put her hand on his leg.

"You look tired." Belle said. Gold nodded in agreement with her statement. "Why don't you, um – go get yourself ready for bed? I'll take your plate down and clean up, then I'll change for bed and – I'll come back upstairs. If – if that's alright with you."

"That's probably best. For your safety." Gold said. "You still have that phone that Miss Swan gave you, right?"

"Yes." Belle said.

"Bring that up as well. You need to have that on you at all times, and keep it charged." Gold said. "If you need to reach her urgently, it'll be important."

"Okay." Belle said. She took his dinner plate and went downstairs. She got herself ready for bed; she found the phone that Emma gave her sitting on a nightstand and she picked it up and carried it upstairs with her. Gold was lying in his bed, wearing his pajamas, when Belle arrived. He was staring up at the ceiling, wide awake. Belle climbed into bed with him, setting her phone down on the nightstand.

"There's a plug on the wall there; make sure it's charging." Gold said, and Belle did as he asked. "There's also a pistol in the nightstand. In case it becomes necessary for you to have it."

"Am I safe here, Ian?" Belle asked, and she snuggled up to him. He wrapped his arms around her.

"There is extra security surrounding the estate; they're very discreet, you wouldn't even know they're there." Gold said. "They'll remain until another safe haven is found for you. But I don't want to take any chances; I want you to be prepared for anything."

"How much more can you tell me? About yourself, your work?" Belle asked.

"Some. Not all. Not because I don't want to, but – for your safety, you understand that, right?" Gold said. Belle nodded. "Can we maybe have that conversation tomorrow? I'm – tired."

"You were a bit restless last night." Belle said.

"I haven't slept well all week." Gold said.

"Keeping things bottled up inside will do that to you." Belle said. Gold kissed her on the forehead and sighed.

"This was supposed to be a simple witness protection situation. All I was supposed to do was keep an eye out for some little librarian who needed to be kept safe, I figured I could handle that much, how much trouble could a mousy little girl be? It's not like I planned to forge a friendship or any relationship. I assumed if I was enough of a bastard she would simply do as she was told and leave me alone." Gold said.

"I think I mentioned before what happens when you assume." Belle teased.

"Indeed you did." Gold said. Belle sat up a bit and gave him several soft kisses on the lips, which he returned. Belle then laid her head back on the pillow, and Gold rolled onto his side, resting his head on her shoulder. Belle put her arms around him.

"You have my arms back again." Belle said.

"Can I have them all night please?" Gold asked.

"Of course you can. Get some sleep, alright?" Belle said.

"I think – I think I'll sleep quite well tonight." Gold said. He closed his eyes and sighed contentedly, and fell into a deep sleep while Belle held him in her arms, never once letting go.


	11. Chapter 11

_Really, really, REALLY grateful for all of you wonderful comments! Hope you enjoy this one - there's a BIG surprise for you at the end! ;)_

_I do not own 'Once Upon a Time.'_

**_Chapter 11_**

Gold was still sleeping soundly in her arms when Belle awoke the next morning. They had slept quite late, as it was nearing ten in the morning. Neither of them had been sleeping well for the past week, and now that the unresolved tension between them was becoming resolved, they could both relax at last.

Belle ran her fingers through Gold's hair and peppered his cheek with gentle kisses until he began to stir awake. He opened his eyes and looked up at her and smiled.

"Good morning." Belle said softly.

"That it is." Gold said, and he moved his lips to her and kissed her. "How late is it?"

"Almost ten. I think this was first real sleep either of us have had all week." Belle said.

"I like waking up in your arms. I think I'd like to always wake up in your arms." Gold said, and he snuggled up with her and sighed.

"Do you um – have anything to do today? For work?" Belle asked.

"Miss Swan has the day off – we'll be quite busy this week so I told her to just take some time for herself." Gold said. "So – to answer your question – my plans today are whatever you would like me to do."

"Well, I have to clean your office first." Belle said.

"That can wait. I told you – there's no need to clean for me any longer, you're not my maid." Gold said.

"What am I then?" Belle asked.

"You," Gold began, and he gave her a quick kiss, "are beautiful," he said, and he kissed her again, "and smart," he said, followed by another kiss, "and a lovely little chatterbox that I could listen to all day." Gold finished his sentence with several more kisses.

"I thought my 'earbashing' annoyed you." Belle said.

"Never." Gold said. Belle raised her eyebrow at him. "Well, maybe at first but – I would gladly listen to your earbashing all day long." They kissed once more.

"Are you hungry?" Belle asked.

"Starving." he replied.

"You should be, you didn't eat much yesterday. How about I bring us breakfast in bed, would you like that?" Belle asked.

"That sounds absolutely heavenly." Gold replied.

"Do you want your usual Sunday fare then?" Belle asked. Gold thought about it for a moment.

"You know what? Why don't you surprise me with something different today?" Gold asked.

"Really? First no cleaning and now this. You sure you're alright with breaking your routine?" Belle asked.

"You were right about me, Belle. I haven't been living, I've been existing. You – you make me want to live again. About time I started doing that and – trying different things is probably a good move toward that." Gold said.

"Well alright then." Belle said. "I know just what I'm going to make." Belle sat up and sprung out of bed.

"What is that?" Gold asked.

"It's a surprise." Belle said, and she smiled at him as she bounced out of the room. Gold watched her leave, and he sat up in bed, leaned against the headboard, and sighed. He never, not in his wildest dreams, thought that he would ever have this. He never fathomed that he would have someone in his life that loved him, let alone someone as beautiful and perfect as Belle French. He didn't even want to think about the fact that she had to leave soon – because now that he found her, and admitted his love for her – he didn't know how he was going to manage without her.

Belle came back into the bedroom about thirty minutes later with a tray. She set it on the edge of the bed carefully and climbed back in next to him. "What is that?"

"Eggs in a basket." Belle said. "My mum used to make them all the time, it's my favorite. Here – give it a try." Belle put a piece on a fork and put it up to Gold's mouth, and he took a bite.

"It's good." Gold said. "Fabulous."

"Well I know how you like your eggs too, so – I made yours exactly I how I thought you'd prefer it. I like mine a bit runnier." Belle said, and she took a bite from her own plate. They sat and ate their breakfast while snuggled together. "So – what do you want to do today?" Belle asked as they finished up.

"I'm good staying up here all day. With you." Gold said. Belle smiled at him.

"That does sound nice. But I thought – well, since we really haven't had a 'date' per se, we could get a couple of those in." Belle said.

"Belle, you can't leave the house and I – I don't think that I'm ready for that just yet." Gold said.

"Well, we don't have to leave the house, we can - be creative. How about this? I'll plan an afternoon date for us, and you come up with something for the evening. Sound good?" Belle asked.

"That sounds lovely. I think I could do that, yes." Gold said.

"Alright then – why don't you get ready for the day and – I'll go take this back downstairs and come up with something fun for us this afternoon." Belle said. "By the way, do you um – you don't have any other clothes but suits, do you? Something a bit more – casual?"

"Actually, yes I do. I just – there's a hidden door in my closet, they're all in there. Haven't worn them in years." Gold said.

"Well – since we're doing different things today – maybe that would be another thing you could try. For our afternoon date – if you don't mind." Belle said.

"Okay." Gold said. "I suppose that's not too difficult a task."

"You see – you can start living again. Let me get some things ready and – meet me in the living room in two hours." Belle said. "No peeking until then."

"Alright – I'll see you in two hours then." Gold said. Belle picked up the breakfast tray and left the room.

* * *

Lunchtime arrived, and Belle was waiting outside the living room for Gold. She greeted him outside of the room with a kiss on the cheek. As per her instructions, he was wearing a pair of jeans and one of his button-down shirts. "Couldn't find any other shirt to wear other than the ones I have for my suits." he said.

"It's okay. You look wonderful." Belle told him.

I wasn't supposed to bring anything, right?" he asked.

"Only yourself." Belle replied. "Come on – let's go." Belle took his hand and led him into the room. The coffee table was covered with a tablecloth, and there was a picnic basket lying in the middle of the table, along with two paper plate place settings and cups of iced tea.

"A picnic? Belle, this is lovely, where did you find these things?" Gold asked.

"Oh, I've discovered all kinds of things hidden in the pantry. Come on, let's sit." Belle said, and she and Gold sat down on the sofa. "I hope you like this, it's not something you normally eat." Belle opened the picnic basket; inside it was a plate with two hamburgers and a bag of chips.

"Belle, I – I haven't had a hamburger in forever." Gold said.

"Well I know you like steak, but – I'm more of a burger girl myself. I'd bought these for me but – well I thought you might enjoy it." Belle said. "Didn't know what you liked on it though so I just put everything in the basket."

"It's been so long but – I did always like them with ketchup." Gold said, and he pulled the ketchup bottle out of the basket. "How about pickles?"

"They're in the basket too." Belle said. She watched as Gold took a bite of his hamburger. "You like it?" she asked.

"Fantastic. Best hamburger I've ever had." Gold said. Belle smiled happily.

"See, it hasn't been that bad – trying new things." she said.

"I'm still having my haggis on Tuesday." Gold insisted.

"Oh, of course, wouldn't dream of taking your illegal haggis from you." Belle said.

"You know – why don't I order a plate for you this week? You should try it." Gold said. "Why should I be the only one to try new things?" Belle made a face.

"You're going to make me eat that stuff?" Belle asked.

"Well – how about we make a deal? You try haggis, and I'll try kangaroo meat." Gold said, and he took a bite of his burger.

"That IS kangaroo meat." Belle said, and Gold choked and spit out his food onto his plate. Belle smirked at him. "That was a quip." she said, and she started laughing.

"You think you're funny, do you? I'll show you how funny you are." Gold said, and he tackled her onto the sofa and began to tickle her as Belle squealed. He did this for about a minute, then stopped and kissed her. "I love you." Gold said quietly.

"I love you, too." Belle replied in agreement, and they kissed once again, a deeper kiss than they had shared up until that point.

* * *

Gold instructed Belle to wait in her quarters in the basement until their evening date, and she couldn't wait to see what he had planned. At about 6 p.m. there was a knock on her door. "Ian?" she called out.

"I have something for you, Belle." she heard him say. Belle opened the door – Gold wasn't there, but a large box was sitting on the floor. The words 'wear this tonight' were written across it. Belle picked up the box and took it in her room. She opened it and gasped – it was a yellow evening gown. It was beautiful, and she could tell it was quite expensive. She smiled excitedly and put it on.

At promptly s 6:30 in the evening, Belle made her way upstairs. Gold was waiting for her at the top of the steps. He was decked out in a tuxedo. "You look lovely, my dear. Absolutely lovely." Gold said, and he kissed her hand.

"And look at you. So handsome. Where did you get these clothes on such short notice?" Belle asked.

"Made a few phone calls. It's one of the few perks of what I do." Gold said. "Are you ready?"

"Alright." Belle said, and Gold offered her his arm, and she happily took it. They walked through the kitchen and into the dining room. The lighting was dim and there were what appeared to be plain white Christmas tree lights strung across the walls, with soft classical music playing in the background. Belle was surprised to see a man standing there dressed in a waiter's uniform. He was a bit short and stocky with a receding hairline and a beard.

"Belle – this is LeRoy." Gold said. "He'll be our maître d' for the evening.

"It's um – Leroy." the man retorted.

"I'm paying you an entire weeks' salary for the next hour; it's LeRoy." Gold said to him through gritted teeth. "Welcome to Chateau Gold, where you will have a romantic dinner of French cuisine." Gold held out a chair for Belle and she sat down.

"Oh, Ian – it's beautiful." Belle said.

"So what do you want to drink, sister?" Leroy asked. Gold glared at him. "I mean – mademoiselle."

"Oh – I don't want any alcohol." Belle said.

"I believe we do have sparkling cider though – isn't that right, LeRoy?" Gold asked.

"Yeah, we got that, Mr. G. – I mean – _mon-soor _Gold." Leroy said, getting the pronunciation wrong. Gold rolled his eyes.

"Well that would be nice then." Belle said. Leroy left the room. She looked at Gold. "Who is he really?" Belle asked.

"Don't worry, he's good. He's um – he's an agent, one of the security officers assigned to guard duty." Gold said.

"Well shouldn't he be doing that instead of – this?" Belle asked.

"This was his night off – I offered him the chance to moonlight for a bit this evening and he took it." Gold said. Leroy came back into the room with a bottle of sparkling cider. He poured some into Belle's glass and then Gold's, and set the bottle down on the table. He then stood there and watched them.

"Shouldn't you be getting the appetizers, LeRoy?" Gold asked.

"You didn't say please." Leroy said. Gold sighed.

"_Please _bring us the appetizers, they're over on the table." Gold said, and Leroy moved to get them. "My apologies, my lady. I'm afraid that LeRoy can be a bit – grumpy at times." Gold said.

"Well he's in good company then, isn't he?" Belle teased.

"Heh. I like her." Leroy said, laughing as he placed the plate of appetizers on the table. Gold glowered at him. Belle and Gold enjoyed a nice romantic dinner that evening as Leroy waited on them. After their final course, Gold looked up at Leroy.

"That will be all LeRoy – I'll take care of everything from here." Gold said. Leroy looked over at Belle.

"You sure you're okay with me leaving you alone with this guy, sister?" Leroy asked.

"We're fine. Thank you; everything was lovely." Belle said.

Leroy grumbled under his breath as he left the room. "Un-freaking-believable. Guy lives locked in his house for twenty years and he gets a date with a beautiful woman, and I can't even get ONE of them to reply to my profile on Match dot com." Belle giggled at bit.

"I apologize for him. Best I could do on short notice. He's actually very good at his job, just – not much else, it appears." Gold said.

"This was wonderful, Ian. Really, it was." Belle said. She stood up and walked over to the sound system that was sitting on one of the cabinets. She turned the volume up and looked over at Gold. "Dance with me. Please?" Belle asked. Gold looked down at his leg.

"Belle, I um – I can't dance. Not anymore." Gold said sadly.

"You can manage a slow dance. Just for a minute." Belle said. Gold stood up nervously and approached Belle. She took his cane from his hand and leaned it against the table, and Gold wrapped his arms around her tightly. "This has been such a nice day. It really has." Belle said as they began to sway to the music.

"I never, ever thought that anything like this would happen to me. Nice things don't happen to me, Belle. Not anymore." Gold said.

"Well get used to them happening again." Belle said. She looked up at him and touched his cheek. "Because I promise you – there will be more coming." Belle nuzzled her cheek against Gold's chest and held him even tighter.

"Belle – I'd like to um – I'd like to tell you about my boy. If that's alright." Ian said. Belle looked up at him.

"I'd love to know about your son, Ian. I want to know everything about him." Belle replied.

* * *

Gold took Belle hand as he walked with her to the west wing of the manor. He took out a key and opened the door to Bae's room. He walked over to the nightstand and turned on the light. "This is um – this is how he left it." Gold said. Belle looked up at him sadly. "I know – it's been twenty years, I should let him go but – he's all I had left, Belle. I just haven't been able to do it."

"It's okay, Ian. So – you have pictures? I want to see them." Belle said. Gold led her to the bed and they sat down together. He opened the nightstand drawer and took out a photo album. It chronicled all of Bae's life, from his birth until his tenth birthday. Belle leafed through the photo album, and Gold commented on several of the photos. She noticed that some of the photos were cut, as if someone were deliberately cut out of them. "Ian – what about – what about Bae's mother?" Belle asked.

"I really don't want to talk about her, Belle." Gold said.

"Did you cut her out of the photos?" Belle asked.

"Yeah." Gold said, looking down. "She wasn't a nice person, Belle. She wasn't – like you. I wish you had been Bae's mum. Things would have been better then."

"I'm the same age as your son, Ian, I don't know how that would have worked." Belle said.

"Are you bothered by that?" Gold asked.

"With all of your other flaws Ian, you think your AGE is what will be a dealbreaker for me? No, I'm not bothered by that at all." Belle said, and she gave Gold a kiss on the cheek. "I don't see you as any particular age, I just – see you. And I love you." Gold kissed her on the lips. Belle went back to perusing through the photo album. She noticed some photos that were taken when Bae was about five years old, and there was a little blonde girl with him, she looked to be about three years old. "Ian – who's the little blonde girl in these photos?"

"She um – she was a girl that I took into my home for about four months. Her parents had died and – well, I offered to care for her. I fully intended for my wife and I to adopt her, but – my wife decided that she didn't want another child. So I – well, the little girl had no other family that was known, so she went into the foster system. I kept an eye on her though, till she came of age. Made sure she was provided for, discreetly, of course. Bae adored her – the four months she was here, they were inseparable. He used to say that he was going to marry her someday, I tried to explain to him that if she were to be his sister that couldn't happen, but – you can't really explain that sort of thing to a five-year-old. But – well, that didn't come to fruition." Gold said sadly.

"You loved her, didn't you?" Belle asked.

"Yeah. I did. She was a sweet, lovely child. To me, she um – I'll always think of that little girl as my daughter." Gold told her.

* * *

_Twenty-five years ago . . . . _

_Gold stared down at the lifeless bodies of the man and woman lying in front of him in the foyer of their house. He looked at the gun in his hand as he ran the fingers in his other hand through his hair. A woman that looked to be in her late forties came into the room, her gun raised up. "You alright, dear?" the woman asked – she had a pronounced cockney English accent. _

"_Yeah. Fine." Gold replied, and he put his gun back in his holster. _

"_You want me to call this one in?" the woman asked as she put her gun away. _

"_Yeah. Go ahead." Gold agreed. He sighed, a look of sadness coming across his face._

"_You're gonna have to get used to this sort of thing, dear. Part of the job. They were bad people, you know that." the woman said. "They could have come with us peacefully. They chose to fight, and they lost. It happens." she said. They both heard a noise coming from upstairs. _

"_What was that?" Gold asked. "There shouldn't be anyone else here."_

"_You want me to go have a look?" the woman asked. _

"_No, you – you call this in. I'll go." Gold said._

"_Be careful." the woman said, as Gold made his way up the stairs. He took out his gun and held it out in front of himself. When he reached the top of the stairs, he heard a distinct noise. It sounded like a child crying. It was coming from one of the bedrooms. Gold cautiously entered the room, still pointing his gun ahead. He put it away as soon as he saw the culprit; it was a little girl with blonde hair. She was huddled in a corner on the floor next to her bed, crying. Gold moved toward her and knelt down in front of her. _

"_Hey – hello there, sweetheart." Gold said quietly. "It's alright – no need to be scared." The little girl looked up at him. "My name is Ian. What's your name?"_

"_Emma." the girl whispered quietly. _

"_Emma. Well, that's a lovely name. Emma." Gold said to her. He reached his arms out to her, and she clung to him tightly. _


	12. Chapter 12

_I was gonna tack on one more scene to this one, but after re-reading it I decided no, I like it ending just where it is. :)_

_THANK YOU as always for the feedback and I see I have new readers - welcome to all of you! I am very grateful for all of your comments! By the way, just a small clarification because it was brought up in comments to me - Snow and Charming are NOT Emma's parents in this fic. It just didn't work in this verse. _

_I do not own 'Once Upon a Time.'_

**_Chapter 12_**

Belle spent the night in Gold's room once again; Gold had to work the next morning so they set an alarm. They both got up at 6:30 and Belle went downstairs to prepare breakfast for the two of them. She prepared his usual Monday fare, and they sat down and enjoyed their meal together. "So what are you doing today?" Belle asked.

"I um – can't tell you those things. Spy stuff, you know." Gold said.

"Right. It's okay – I understand that." Belle replied. "You'll be busy all day then?"

"Till at least six. We can have lunch though – Miss Swan always goes out to get her lunch." Gold replied.

"How long have you been working with Emma?" Belle asked.

"Eight years on and off. I trained her and she is a surveillance specialist as I am. The past two years we've been on the same case together, and since all of the equipment is here it's easier for her to come here and work." Gold said.

"Well, that's nice for you. To have her company, I mean." Belle said.

"She's a good agent – but then again, she – she had a good mentor." Gold said, just as Emma barged into the dining room.

"Are you about done with your breakfast date here? We have things to work on." Emma said.

"Well, good morning to you too, Miss Swan." Gold said. He and Belle both stood up, having finished their breakfast. Gold walked over to Belle and planted a kiss on her cheek. "I'll be down for lunch. Miss Swan will do the shopping today – get a list together for her, love."

"I will?" Emma asked.

"Well, unless you have someone else in mind that can go into town. Because Belle isn't going out there." Gold said.

"Fine, whatever." Emma said.

"Emma – can I – talk to you for a moment?" Belle asked.

"I'll be upstairs." Gold said, and he left the room.

"If you want to talk to me about whatever the hell is going on with you and Gold, I'm really not -" Emma began, and Belle interrupted her.

"I know all of this is probably a surprise to you but -"

"Oh, that's an understatement." Emma said.

"I also know that Ian has – issues, but -" Belle began.

"Issues? Oh, he has WAY more than issues, you probably don't even know the half of it." Emma said.

"He's getting better." Belle said. "He didn't have any of his regular Sunday meals yesterday, and we even slept in till ten."

"Don't need to know your sleeping habits, I already saw more than I needed to. Besides – you're only gonna be here a few more days. There's nothing I can do about that." Emma said.

"That's why I wanted to talk to you." Belle said. "I, um – I was wondering if – when you go out today, you could – pick us up some – um – well, I'm not on the pill or anything and I don't think Ian has anything here so -"

"You want me to buy you CONDOMS?" Emma asked, a disgusted look coming over her face. "So wait a minute – you guys haven't -"

"Not yet, no. But – after I leave, I don't know when I'll see him again, and I just wanted us to – really be together." Belle said. Emma began to pace.

"No. No way. No way in hell am I buying that for you." Emma said.

"I'll give you the money." Belle said.

"It's not about the money – you don't know what you're getting yourself into here with him. Come on, the guy has been a recluse for twenty years, isn't that a red flag?" Emma asked.

"I know about his son dying." Belle said. "He's just had a hard time coping, that's all."

"Okay, I get it now, you've got the Florence Nightingale complex – you're one of these girls that likes to fix people, aren't you? Well let me tell you something – that guy CANNOT be fixed." Emma said.

"I already told you he's getting better. We had a lovely day yesterday." Belle said.

"One day. You had ONE DAY." Emma told her. "I've seen him have good days too, so don't think you're special. But I've also seen him at his worst. And that's not a pretty sight."

"I've seen him drunk. I've seen him – lose his temper." Belle said.

"You think THAT'S his worst? Honey, that's not even close to his worst, that was just the pre-game show." Emma said. "You may think you know him, but you don't."

"I know his heart. I know he loves me." Belle said.

"That's not always enough." Emma said.

* * *

Belle spent the day cleaning Gold's office, since she didn't do so the day before. Even though he said she no longer had to clean, Belle needed something to occupy her time. After she finished, she went into the living room to read for a bit. She was almost through with her book when Gold came downstairs. "There's my girl." Gold said, and Belle stood up and gave him a hug. Gold then kissed her on the lips. "Miss me?" he asked. Emma stood in the doorway watching in disbelief.

"Yes. I did." Belle replied. "I have our lunch ready, it's just warming in the oven. Emma I have that list for you, too."

"How about I go get our lunch set up and you go over things with Miss Swan?" Gold asked. He gave her another quick kiss on the cheek and left the room.

"I have the list right here." Belle said, and she picked up a piece of paper off the coffee table and handed it to Emma. "I um – I understand your concerns about Ian and I, but – will you please reconsider getting what I asked for?"

"It's a BAD idea." Emma said.

"Didn't you just see him? What he was like just now?" Belle asked.

"Yeah, I saw him. He's been like that all morning too – all nice, and polite, and not yelling – it's weird." Emma said. "And okay, maybe you're having a good effect on him. But I'm not getting you what you asked for."

"Excuse me, Miss Swan – did I just hear you turn down a request for something Belle wants?" Gold asked. He entered the room, went to Belle's side, and put his arm around her. "Miss Swan, whatever Belle wishes to have – she shall have." Gold gave Belle a kiss on the cheek. "Lunch is all set at the table, sweetheart."

"Yeah, she's not getting this." Emma said.

"Miss Swan – I believe that – well, that you owe me a favor, do you not?" Gold asked.

"You want to cash in your favor on this? Really?" Emma asked.

"As a matter of fact, yes I do." Gold said. "You get Belle whatever she likes."

"Alright then." Emma said, and she looked over at Belle. "So – what size?"

"Um – average, I suppose." Belle replied.

"Really? Huh. I'd have gone with small." Emma replied. "Just remember, Gold – this is your favor, right?"

"Yes." Gold replied.

"Okay. Be back in a bit." Emma said, and she left.

"You let me handle Emma, alright? She can be difficult. She's had a hard life." Gold said.

"She seems a lot like you. Closed off, brash, hiding her emotions – I think someone hurt her. Badly." Belle said.

"They did." Gold agreed. "But that's Emma's tale to tell, not mine." Gold said. "Come on – lunch is getting cold." With his left arm around her, Gold led Belle into the dining room.

* * *

That evening, Belle and Gold were cuddled in bed together. Gold had his pajama top off and was wearing only the bottoms. "So – that one right there, on your shoulder – what's that scar from?" Belle asked.

"Gunshot wound. That was in Germany – Munich, if I remember correctly." Gold said.

"How about these two, on your chest?" Belle asked.

"Knife. Russia – that one almost did me in, that second one there – inch away from my heart." Gold said. Belle reached over him and kissed each scar gently.

"How about the um – scar on your abdomen?" Belle asked.

"Oh, that one? Horribly traumatic. I um – I had to have my appendix taken out when I was fourteen. Missed two and a half weeks of school. Still haven't gotten over it." Gold said.

"I thought most fourteen year old boys would be thrilled to miss two and a half weeks of school." Belle said.

"Yes, well – I hated it. Didn't like having to catch up on what I missed. I was a bit of a bookworm." Gold said.

"I thought you said you weren't much of a reader." Belle said.

"Not for leisure, no, but – I was a very studious lad. Especially science, logic – I was fascinated by computers. To me they were – and are – the closest thing to magic we have in this world." Gold said. Belle began to laugh. "What?" Gold asked.

"You were a nerd." Belle said.

"Well what's wrong with that?" Gold asked.

"Nothing, just – you don't seem to be the nerdy type. I mean – you have a tattoo on your shoulder. Since when do nerds get tattoos?"

"They do when you're out on the town with your mates at age eighteen in London and you're dared to get one." Gold said. Belle glanced at the tattoo on his shoulder.

"Why a lizard?" Belle asked.

"Why not?" Gold replied. "It was – interesting. Plus it was on the first page of designs and I just wanted to get it over with before my alcohol buzz wore off and I could actually feel them doing it. I have one on my right ankle too."

"Ooooh, I want to see that one." Belle said, and she moved toward his leg, but Gold stopped her.

"Belle, please. Don't." Gold said.

"Ian, I – I'm going to have to see it eventually." Belle said.

"I just – I'm not ready for that yet. Okay?" Gold asked.

"Okay." Belle said, and she gave him a quick kiss. "Do you want to tell me how it happened?"

"I – I'd rather not. Not right now." Gold said.

"Alright. You'll tell me when you're ready." Belle said. "So – do you want to hear my battle scar stories?"

"You have battle scars?" Gold asked.

"Well, I don't have tales that are as intriguing as yours, but – I have a couple." Belle said. She pulled back her pant leg and showed Gold the back of her left knee; there was a scar about four inches long there.

"What happened there?" Gold asked as he sat up to look.

"I was nine years old and I got caught in the middle of an argument between my bicycle and a gravel road. I, unfortunately, was the one who lost the argument. I lost control and fell and one of the spokes in my back wheel got knocked loose and pretty much tore my skin off back there."

"Ouch." Gold said, making a face.

"Sixteen stitches; I screamed bloody murder for nearly an hour straight, I'm surprised you didn't hear me in the states." Belle said.

"Oh, that's what that noise was then." Gold teased as he reached down and kissed her scar. "Any others?"

"Right here." Belle said, and she pointed to her right temple. Gold examined it closely.

"Where?" he asked.

"By the eyebrow. It's hard to see, you've got to get in the right light, it actually cuts through my brow." Belle said. Gold looked closer.

"Oh, there it is. That little thing?" Gold asked, and he gave her a kiss on top of the scar.

"Yeah, that little thing was even more traumatic than the bicycle incident. I was fifteen and had just moved to New York from Australia. I was new in school and I was doing my best to make friends but I had this odd accent that everyone made fun of and I was always reading and they teased me about that too. Anyway, there was this boy in school that I just had such a crush on but I couldn't get him to notice me not matter what I did." Belle said.

"Are you sure he could see?" Gold joked. Belle laughed a bit.

"I hadn't quite - filled out yet, and my hair was a shorter. **I** was shorter – my second year of high school and I still looked like an elementary student. I was a bit of a late bloomer. So I was determined to get him to notice me. They had this dance at the school, and my papa told me I could have any dress I wanted, so I found this beautiful pink dress and this lovely pair of pink shoes to match. Of course, I hadn't really worn heels much before, and these were three-inch heels which I foolishly thought I could handle fine. Anyhow – I got to the dance, and when I opened the door to go in I lost my balance and fell face-first right into the door and cut my temple right at my eyebrow. Blood splattered everywhere - on the door, on the ground, and on my pretty pink dress." Belle said.

"Well, did he notice you?" Gold teased.

"Oh, everyone noticed me. The entire school started calling me the 'clumsy kangaroo' or the 'wobbly wallaby'. They even made note of it in the yearbook. And I ended up with four stiches on that one, plus a black eye that took over a week to go away." Belle said.

"Weren't you modeling shortly after that?" Gold asked.

"I was. Had a growth spurt that summer – finally. And all of a sudden all of these boys that did nothing but either laugh at me or ignore me decided I was interesting, which made me happy until I went out with them and found out that none of them had a brain in their head; in most cases, if they had one at all, it was located - elsewhere. Idiots, the entire lot of them. Immature, boorish, brainless twats." Belle said.

"Maybe that's why you like older men, then." Gold said.

"Well, I don't like stupid men – and you're definitely not that." Belle said. "Age doesn't really matter to me. I told you – I just see you." Belle climbed on top of him and started to kiss him hard on the lips, then began to kiss him up and down his chest. Gold trembled at the touch of her lips against his skin. "I want to be with you, Ian. I mean – really BE with you." Belle said. Gold pushed her away and sat up. "That is where all of this has been leading to, right?"

"Um – Belle, I haven't -"

"Ian, I know you've been in this house for twenty years, but it's not like it's something you forget how to do." Belle said. "I mean, you – you still CAN, right?"

"Of course I can. I just – Belle, you have to leave soon. I thought that – maybe it would be best if we – waited." Gold said.

"Ian, it could be months before we see each other again. I don't want to wait." Belle said. "I had Emma get us something." Belle reached into the drawer and pulled out a box of condoms.

"Oh, good god, THAT was what you asked her to get?" Gold asked, his eyes widening. "I used my favor on – THAT!? Emma! Good god, you asked EMMA for -"

"Ian, calm down." Belle said, rubbing his shoulders. "You've never called her Emma before, it's always Miss Swan. You do that a lot, don't you? Refuse to use names other than formal names. Why is that?" Belle asked.

"Because names – imply familiarity. Names give you power. And if you use someone's first name – they have power over you!" Gold shouted at her.

"So – you've given me power over you then?" Belle asked.

"Reciprocally." Gold replied. "Oh god – Emma bought these. Belle – I can't – I mean -"

"Ian, it's not like she doesn't know what's happening between us, she's an adult." Belle said.

"She's my daughter! Emma – is the girl in the pictures, Belle! She's my daughter!" Gold screamed. He got up out of bed, put on his pajama top, which was lying at the foot of the bed, grabbed his cane, and moved as quickly as he could toward the study, and Belle followed.

"Ian, please – I'm sorry, I didn't know." Belle said, almost crying. "Please don't drink, Ian."

"I'm not drinking." Gold said, and he made his way to his spinning wheel and sat down. He started to work at it, staring at it intently. Belle moved to stand behind him, and put her hands on his shoulders.

"Does it help? Spinning?" Belle asked.

"Helps me to calm down so I don't get – upset." Gold replied, still focused on the wheel.

"I'm sorry I upset you. I'm sorry." Belle said.

"You didn't know." Gold said. "It's alright."

"Does Emma know? About you? About her – connection with you?" Belle asked.

"Yeah. She knows." Gold replied, still not looking at her. "I got drunk one day and – Emma was there. Apparently I – told her things. Same way I told you things."

"You do tend to, um – reveal quite a bit when you're drinking." Belle said. "How did she take it?"

"Not well at first." Gold said. "I killed her parents, Belle. They – they were Russian spies. They had set up a whole life in the states, had been preparing for it since childhood apparently. They even had a child of their own – which no one knew until – well after. I found her in her bedroom, crying. Poor thing was terrified, I still don't know what she saw, if anything, nor does she. She was barely three years old so hopefully that is a memory that will be forever buried."

"Does she remember living with you?" Belle asked.

"No. She doesn't." Gold said. He stopped spinning and leaned back against Belle.

"You alright?" Belle asked, running her fingers through his hair. Gold nodded.

"Let's go back to bed." he said quietly. Gold stood up, and Belle took his hand as they walked back to the bedroom together and climbed back into bed. Belle quickly grabbed the box of condoms and tossed them back into the nightstand drawer. She snuggled into Gold's arms. "Belle, it's not that I don't want you. I do want you – more than you can even imagine. But – if we – and then you leave – I don't think I could handle that."

"I don't want to leave, Ian. Please don't make me leave." Belle said, and she started to cry. Gold kissed the top of her head.

"Belle, if there were any other way -"

"Come with me. You can come with me, you – you can be my protector." Belle said.

"No – I can't. They've connected you with me; the worst possible thing for us right now is to be together. It puts both of us in danger." Gold said. Belle looked up at him. "Sweetheart – when all of this is resolved, and I promise you, it WILL be resolved – we'll be together. And it will be magic."

"Okay." Belle said. She lay quietly in his arms for several minutes.

"By the way – average?" Gold asked.

"It was a guess – was I wrong?" Belle asked. Gold smiled a bit.

"Sweetheart, I might not have been graced with the gift of height but – I make up for it in other ways." Gold said. Belle sat up a bit.

"Really?" she asked.

"Something for you to look forward to." Gold told her. Belle leaned over him and kissed him.

"I can hardly wait." she replied.

* * *

The next morning, Gold and Belle enjoyed an early breakfast in bed. Since this was the day on which his meals were delivered, Gold ordered an extra meal for Belle. After breakfast, they each separately got ready for the day, and then Belle came back upstairs to meet Gold in the study. He was at his spinning wheel when she entered the room.

"You really like that, don't you? Spinning, I mean." Belle said.

"My, um – my mother taught me. Or she started to, I was just a wee lad. After she was gone, I kept at it. It was a way to – forget. And remember. At the same time." Gold said. "It helps me to – keep calm when the need arises."

"So why don't you do that instead of throwing things all over the room?" Belle asked. "Like you did last night."

"Because sometimes – I just can't control the beast." Gold said. Belle kissed him on the cheek.

"You're not a beast. Come on – you have a bit of time before you have to start work, right?" Belle asked.

"A bit, yes." Gold said.

"Well – let's take advantage of that, then." Belle said. She took his hand and led him over to the sofa. She climbed onto his lap and faced him, then kissed him on the lips.

"You don't mind doing this, do you?" Belle asked.

"Don't mind at all." Gold said. They kissed for several minutes, and were interrupted by Emma entering the room through the hidden door.

"What, didn't have enough fun last night?" Emma asked. Gold immediately pulled away from Belle and turned a bit red.

"Emma, I'm – I'm sorry, I didn't know your relationship to him, I never would have asked you if I had." Belle said.

"What relationship? He's the jerk that I work with because no one else will put up with him." Emma said. Gold looked down sadly when she said that. "Everything's all set, by the way. We're leaving tomorrow."

"Tomorrow? That soon?" Belle asked.

"Where is she going?" Gold asked.

"Robin and Marian will take her in. You know anything about babies?" Emma asked Belle.

"Um – no, not really, why?" Belle asked.

"This is a friend of mine from my early days in training and his wife; she's eight months pregnant and they were looking for an au pair, and said if you could do that until all of this – ends – you can stay with them." Emma said.

"Um – alright – I guess I can learn that. Where do they live?" Belle asked, standing up. Gold stood up after her.

"Couldn't you find somewhere closer?" Gold asked.

"For what, so that she could sneak out the window at night to come over here?" Emma snapped.

"Where am I going?" Belle asked.

"England." Gold said. "A dumpy little village called Nottingham."

"Hey, you haven't been there in over twenty years – it's not like it used to be." Emma said. Gold walked over to the fireplace mantle and began to finger one of the knick knacks sitting on it. Belle could see that he was angry, and she walked up behind him.

"Ian – I know what you're thinking about doing, but please don't. I know you're upset but you don't need to do that." Belle said calmly, and she wrapped her arms around him from behind.

"I don't want you to be that far away from me." Gold whispered, setting the item back down on the mantle.

"Is there a way we can keep in touch?" Belle asked.

"No." he replied. Gold turned to face her, and pulled Belle into a hug. "I need to discuss some things with Miss Swan – do you mind going downstairs for a bit?"

"Okay." Belle said. She looked up at Gold and touched his cheek. "We'll get through this." Gold stared at Belle sadly as she walked out of the room.

"Didn't I tell you weeks ago what a really bad idea it would be if you and her -" Emma began.

"Yes you did, Miss Swan, you really don't need to remind me of that." Gold said.

"I don't need you distracted. And if you give as much of a crap about me as you claim to -"

"I do." Gold said.

"Then stop mooning over that librarian and help me get my son back!" Emma screamed at him.


	13. Chapter 13

_Had some unexpected free time tonight, so here . . . have a chapter!_

_This one is a tiny bit cryptic but keep in mind that EVERYTHING that is said means something or I wouldn't put it there. :) _

_I do not own 'Once Upon a Time.'_

Emma Swan didn't have a very charmed life. Her earliest memory was when she was about five years old – she was in the principal's office at school, her first day in kindergarten. She remembers punching some boy in the face, though she couldn't quite remember why. Emma was certain, however, that there was probably a good reason for it.

She was told that her parents died when she was three. She had no memory of them, and only one photo of them – she resembled her father much more than her mother. She knew she had no family. And she knew that no one had ever wanted her. She spent most of her childhood being shuffled from foster home to foster home, some better than others. When she turned seventeen, she petitioned to be emancipated, and it was granted provided that she finish high school, which she did. Emma wasn't the best student in the world – she was alright; never got straight A's, but never failed anything, either.

During her final year of school, when she was on her own, she met someone. He was nineteen, handsome, and he treated her like a princess. She was in love with him. At least she thought it was love. Until he left. And then she found out she was pregnant.

She was angry at first. Anger soon turned into fear. She didn't know what to do – should she get rid of it? Should she give it up? Should she keep the baby? She ended up choosing the latter – and Emma was determined to give her son, her Henry, a far better life than she had. For once in her life someone wanted her and someone loved her. Henry would never doubt that he was loved, not if she had anything to say about it.

Shortly after Henry was born, Emma knew that she wasn't going to be able to provide for her little boy on a high school education, not in the way that she felt he deserved. She just had to figure out what she wanted to do with her life. She enjoyed adventure and was always getting into trouble as a kid – nothing major, but enough to get sent to the principal at least every other week. In sixth grade, she once over heard the principal say that 'kids Emma usually either end up in jail, or they become a cop.' She never forgot that. And that's what made her decided to study criminal justice.

Emma worked very hard to support herself and Henry and to do well in school. After her second year in the program, she was approached after class one day by a man who said that one of her teachers had recommended her for a special training program in addition to her coursework. Emma had a gift for solving puzzles – and she had an uncanny ability to tell when someone was lying. She was one of the top students in her class, and this opportunity would accelerate her training and education and possibly even place her in a government surveillance program.

It was through this training that she met Ian Gold. He had handpicked her out of a number of other candidates in the program to be trained under his tutelage. At least that's what he told her. She couldn't understand why she had to go to the creepy old pink house (or salmon, as he reprimanded her several times) for training. He was strict, and demanding – but she learned more from him than in any of her classes.

He wasn't all bad though. At least her son didn't think so. Mr. Gold allowed Henry to come to the house when she worked with him. She actually thought he lit up a bit whenever Henry was there. It was clear this odd, reclusive man, adored children. Once Henry could talk he asked Mr. Gold one day if he could call him 'Grandpa Gold'. Emma was embarrassed – and stunned when Gold said that yes, he could do that.

After her training and schooling was complete, Emma was given an entry-level job with the CIA at Gold's recommendation. She and Henry spent the next several years traveling to various parts of the country, and sometimes outside of the country. On occasion she would return to Maine to work with Gold; Henry always enjoyed that – he was always happy to see his 'grandpa'.

Nearly two years ago, Emma was asked to settle in Maine to begin working with Gold on the Regina Mills syndicate case. This was the biggest case she had been given – and Gold asked for her specifically to assist him. He spent his entire day holed up in his house, doing computer surveillance. She was amazed at how much the man could accomplish without even leaving his home. She never questioned why he didn't leaving – something in her gut told her that she probably didn't want to know.

About a year into the assignment, they began to get closer than ever to gathering evidence against Regina Mills. Unfortunately, she seemed to be two steps ahead of them at every turn, and they just couldn't pinpoint why that was.

One afternoon, she had taken Henry to the park to play for a bit. He was almost nine years old; every free moment she had was his. That afternoon her cell phone was ringing off the hook. Work-related issues that just couldn't seem to wait until she got home. She only looked away for a moment. Not even a minute, really. Henry had been playing on the swings. And then she looked up – and he wasn't there. She ran through the park, frantically calling out his name. But he wasn't there. He was gone. It was as if he had simply – vanished.

Only he didn't vanish. Gold immediately got to work on the search for him, and soon it was discovered that the person who took him was none other than Regina Mills. And that was their dilemma. If they took out Regina – they'd never find Henry. And Regina was crafty, and clever, and knew how to hide better than anyone, because Regina herself had had a good mentor – and Ian Gold regretted every moment of training he gave to her.

* * *

"Any word on Hopper?" Gold asked Emma after she got off the phone.

"Still not talking." Emma said. "Whoever got to him is way scarier than we are."

"Why don't you bring him here to have a chat? I'll show him scary." Gold said.

"Yeah, after your last interrogation debacle, you're not allowed to do that anymore." Emma said. "It has to be Regina. Who else could it be?"

"Well, whoever she's working for, for one. Regina got caught – she's getting sloppy. It was only a matter of time before that happened, she was never as disciplined as you were." Gold said. "It's hard to stay disciplined when your only motivation is revenge."

"His birthday's tomorrow. He'll be ten." Emma said, sniffling back tears. "Do you think she knows that?"

"I don't know." Gold replied.

"I bought him a present. I was hoping he'd be home so I could give it to him. But he's not – and instead of being with my son, I have to haul your girlfriend off to England because you were too caught up in your little lust fest to spot a snitch." Emma remarked angrily.

"And what about you? You're supposed to be so intuitive – you're the one who cleared Hopper, not me. I trusted you had done a thorough job." Gold said.

"I told you – they got to him after. It was your job to figure it out after that point, I never saw him." Emma said. "I should go – I think we're done for the day. I'm sure you and Belle want to have one last nice evening together."

"Yeah. We do." Gold said sadly.

"Gwen's flight comes in late tonight, I'm picking her up." Emma said. "She'll be here tomorrow."

"I don't know why you called her." Gold said.

"I can't just leave you here by yourself, not after everything that's happened the last couple of weeks." Emma said. "You know she's gonna raid your booze stash and pitch it, right?"

"She'll have to find it all first." Gold said.

"Are you actually planning a life with Belle or what? Cause you're gonna have to get your crap together if that's your goal. I keep telling you that I think you need to be in rehab but that would require you leave the house." Emma said. "You think she's gonna permanently hole herself up in this tomb of a mansion with you and your over-priced whiskey and anger management issues? Don't count on it."

"I'll worry about that when the time comes. Right now – my priority is getting Henry back, getting rid of Regina Mills, and keeping Belle safe." Gold said.

"How much have you told her about – stuff?" Emma asked.

"She knows about Bae." Gold said.

"Does she know what happened or HOW it happened?" Emma asked. Gold paused for a moment.

"She knows I lost him. That's all – for now." Gold said. "I don't see the point in going into all the details just yet."

"What about your, uh – personal issues?" Emma asked.

"She knows what she needs to know at the moment." Gold said. Emma rolled her eyes.

"Yeah, this is a healthy relationship. Gonna last for years." Emma remarked sarcastically.

"Don't you have somewhere to be? I believe I've had enough of your judgment." Gold said.

"Fine, I'll go. You're eating that disgusting sheep food thing tonight, aren't you?" Emma asked.

"It's called haggis – and I recall you enjoying it quite a bit when you were a wee little thing. Even asked for seconds." Gold said.

"Yeah, I'm glad I don't remember that." Emma said, making a face. "I'll see you tomorrow." Emma said, and she left. A few minutes after Emma left, Gold picked up his phone and made a call.

"So – you have our friend then?" Gold asked. "Yes – downstairs, in the back room. Make sure he's – kept quiet. I'll get to him this evening." Gold said, and he hung up the phone.

* * *

"I'm not eating that." Belle said as she looked down at her plate.

"One bite – that's all I'm asking." Gold said. Belle took a taste of the potatoes on her plate. "Of the HAGGIS. Your turn to try new things, love. We had a deal." Belle put a piece of the haggis on her fork and made a face as she put it up to her mouth. She took a very small bite, closed her eyes, and swallowed. She cringed as it made its way down her throat. Belle immediately reached for her iced tea and practically gulped the entire glass down. "Well?" Gold asked.

"I think I'm full." Belle said, shoving her plate away.

"Alright – more for me." Gold said, and he grabbed her plate.

"You'd better brush your teeth at least three times before you even think about kissing me after you eat that slop." Belle said. She darted out of the room and into the basement, then came back up several minutes later.

"Really didn't like it, huh?" Gold asked.

"Awful." Belle said.

"Perhaps I should have ordered some Vegemite for you to spread on it." Gold teased.

"You're not funny." Belle said. Gold stood up and walked over to Belle and moved in to kiss her, and she backed away. "Upstairs – brush your teeth. Get that foul taste off of your breath, and then we'll do that." Gold pouted.

"Alright, fine." Gold said.

"I'll clean up down here, and then I'll join you. I think I'd like to turn in early tonight." Belle said.

"Me too." Gold replied, and he headed upstairs.

That evening, Belle and Gold lay snuggled together in his bed. "Are you sure you'll be alright?" Belle asked.

"Mrs. Potts will be here. I'll be fine." Gold said.

"No more drinking, right? You promise me you'll stop." Belle said.

"I'll try." Gold replied.

"And your temper?" Belle asked. Gold sighed as he held her close.

"There are many things you don't know, Belle. And I don't have time to tell you all of them right now – and I'm not really sure that I'd want to even if I did." Gold said.

"Ian – you can tell me anything." Belle said to him. "How about one thing? We each tell one another one thing that we haven't told yet. One more thing." Gold thought about it for a moment.

"Alright." Gold said.

"I'll go first." Belle said. "I – I stole once. At a bookstore. I was in college and there was this book I wanted and I didn't have any money or credit cards on me and I just – took it."

"It doesn't count as stealing if you go back the next day to pay for it." Gold said.

"How do you know I did that?" Belle asked.

"Because that's something you'd do." Gold said. "I'm right, aren't I?"

"I'm sorry, I'm just not as interesting as you." Belle said. Gold laughed.

"Not interesting? Belle – you fascinate me. You're kind, and lovely, and you have a smile that lights up an entire room. That's what you are – pure light. You brought light into my world – I haven't had that in twenty years." Gold said. Belle kissed him, blushing a bit.

"So what about you? Your turn to tell me something." Belle said. Gold hesitated and thought to himself for a bit of time. "Ian – I told you – you can tell me anything."

"My wife, she um – she left me for another man. She was going to run off with him and – she had Bae with her. I didn't know he was with her, and um – they were in an accident. He wasn't supposed to be with her that day, but – he was. I should have made sure he was home – I'd still have him if I'd just made sure he was home." Gold said, his voice trembling.

"Oh, Ian – it's not your fault." Belle said, holding onto him tightly. "Your wife, was she – did she die too?" Gold nodded yes, and hugged Belle tightly.

"I will fix this, Belle. I won't let you be gone long, I promise. You will come back to me, won't you?" Gold asked.

"Of course I will." Belle said, and she lifted her head up and kissed him. "And when I come back you'll tell me everything, right?"

"I promise." Gold said.

"And you'll start working on living again, right?" Belle asked.

"I think I can do that – if I have you with me." Gold said. "If you'll help me."

"Well – before all of this chaos happened – I really wasn't living much myself, I was stuck in a bit of a rut, so – we'll help each other, how does that sound?" Belle asked.

"Alright." Gold said. "We'll help each other."

* * *

Gold waited until he was certain that Belle was sound asleep. He got out of bed, walked around to the nightstand on Belle's side of the bed, and took out the gun that was inside of it. He made his way downstairs and into his office. He walked up to the wall in the far corner and pushed on it, and it opened. A small, hidden room was behind the hidden door. And inside the room was Archie Hopper, gagged and tied to a chair. There was a small table and another chair in the room. Gold set his gun down on the table, grabbed the chair, and placed it in front of Hopper, the back of the chair facing the frightened man. Gold removed the gag from Hopper, and straddled the chair, facing him.

"Let me explain." Hopper said, his voice trembling.

"Oh, I'm sure it will be fascinating. Truly fascinating." Gold growled at him. He bent toward Hopper and shoved the tip of his cane in the doctor's mouth. "I'm gonna let you breathe in a second." Gold said, gritting his teeth. "And you're gonna say two sentences. The first is going to tell me who got to you. And the second is going to tell me where she is. Do you understand the rules?" Hopper nodded. "Good. Let's begin." Gold said, and he pulled his cane away.

"I needed the money." Archie whined.

"Now – now you see? THAT is not a good first sentence!" Gold shouted, and lifted up his cane and brought it down upon the man violently.


	14. Chapter 14

_Wasn't intending to get another chapter up this soon, but . . . well here it is. You all wanted more info on Gold's past, right? Don't forget you asked for this! _

_I do thank all of you for the feedback - please keep it coming, I appreciate it! Lots of angst in this one. _

_I do not own 'Once Upon a Time.'_

**_Chapter 14_**

_Twenty two years ago . . . . . . _

"_You said I'd be done. I know that, but – look, I just don't want to do it anymore, alright? You promised me that I could go back to surveillance after the last assignment. No. I understand." Gold said as he spoke on the phone, then Gold slammed the phone down in anger._

"_I don't know what you're so upset about – you're one of their best agents, of course they want you out in the field." Milah said as she entered his office._

"_I almost got killed the last assignment. Not that you give a damn." Gold said, looking up at her._

"_What did you want me to do, Ian? Fly out to Moscow and sit by your bedside and hold your hand?" Milah asked._

"_That would have been nice, yes." Gold replied._

"_Gwen was there. And you were fine." Milah said. "I have a hair appointment – get dinner ready for Bae."_

"_Yes, heaven forbid you should miss your preening session to take care of your son." Gold said angrily. _

"_When do you leave?" Milah asked._

"_Not soon enough for you, apparently." Gold replied. "I have a quick assignment in Boston next week with Gwen before I go."_

"_I'll be back in a couple of hours." Milah said, barely interested. "Make sure Bae does his homework." Milah left the room. Gold sighed in frustration and stood up from behind his desk just as Bae peeked into the room. _

"_Papa?" Bae said._

"_Hey – you get any of your homework done yet, Bae?" Gold said as he walked over to the boy._

"_Why do you and Mama always fight?" Bae asked._

"_I don't know." Gold replied, and he reached out for the boy and hugged him. "So what do you want for dinner tonight?"_

"_Can we go to Granny's? Please?" Bae asked. _

"_I suppose we can do that." Gold said. _

"_You have to go away again, don't you?" Bae asked._

"_Just one more time. This will be the last time Bae, I promise." Gold said. Bae began to cry. "Hey – what's wrong, my boy?"_

"_I don't want you to go away again. Because I'm afraid you'll die, papa. Please don't leave again papa, I don't want you to die." Bae said. Gold hugged the boy again. _

"_Hey – hey, I'm not gonna die, alright. Listen, I – I won't go. I'll find a way, alright? I promise. I'll find a way out of it, I'll find a way to stay." Gold said, hugging Bae tightly._

* * *

A noise from downstairs awakened Belle from her sleep. She groggily rolled over to reach for Gold, only to find his side of the bed empty. "Ian?" she called out as she sat up, but there was no answer. Belle listened carefully and heard the noise again. It sounded like a muffled scream to her. Belle began to get nervous. Shaking, she opened the nightstand drawer – Gold told her that he kept a pistol in the drawer. It was gone. Now becoming even more afraid, Belle reached for her phone, the one that Emma had given to her. She hadn't used it up until now. Belle placed the call to Emma despite the late hour.

"Belle? What's wrong?" Emma answered.

"Ian's not here. I woke up and he's not in bed and – there are noises coming from downstairs. It sounds like voices, and I thought I heard someone scream. Emma, what if someone is here, what if he's hurt?" Belle asked.

"Alright – listen, it'll be okay. I was on my way home, I'll be there in a bit. Gold showed you how to get in the room in his study, right?" Emma asked.

"Yeah." Belle replied.

"Alright, go in there and wait – do NOT go downstairs." Emma said.

"I thought there was security here." Belle said.

"There is – I'll try to get in touch with them, everything will be fine. Do not go downstairs, do you understand?" Emma said.

"But – Ian -"

"Trust me, Gold can take care of himself just fine." Emma said. Belle hung up the phone and walked over to Gold's study as quietly as possible. She could still hear noises.

"Oh Ian – please be alright." Belle said. She turned and looked at the stairs, and was tempted for a moment to go downstairs, but Emma was right – Ian could take care of himself. She made her way into the study, opened the hidden door, and went inside.

* * *

_Twenty-two years ago . . . . . . . . . _

"_You were supposed to cook him dinner not take him out for hamburgers." Milah said angrily as she got dressed for bed._

"_The lad never goes anywhere, Milah – not unless I'm here, he says you don't even let him see his friends." Gold said, sitting up in their bed. "He wanted to go out to eat, what's the harm?"_

"_He got an 82 on his last math test. He doesn't deserve to be going out to eat." Milah said._

"_He's eight, Milah. You can't expect him to be perfect in every subject all the time. He does his best." Gold said. "Maybe if I were around more to help him with his homework he'd do better, lord knows you're useless when it comes to that."_

"_Excuse me for not being a genius like you are." Milah snipped. "I do my best, too." She climbed into the bed with him. _

"_Right, of course you do. When you're not too busy getting your hair or nails done or prancing about town gossiping and – other things." Gold said. They were both quiet for a moment. "I'm going to work on getting out of this assignment. Bae doesn't want me to go."_

"_Bae never wants you to go. You spoil that boy; he clings to you whenever you're home and you do nothing but coddle him." Milah said._

"_He's my SON – and in the last three years with all of the assignments I've been on I cherish every moment I have with him. I'm sorry that he bores you so much, heaven forbid you should actually try and be a parent to him."_

"_You don't know what it's like to be raising a child on your own half the time." Milah said._

"_And that's my fault too, I suppose? I was perfectly happy working in surveillance. You're the one who pushed for me to get out there in the field. I never wanted that. I'm not cut out for it, Milah, you know that – even Gwen knows that, she really pressed for me to be taken off active duty after Moscow." Gold said._

"_She mothers you too much." Milah said. "She's supposed to be your mentor, not your babysitter." _

"_At least she gives a damn about me." Gold said. "I want out, Milah. I'm done." Milah turned and looked at him._

"_You're a coward, Ian. You could have one of the most decorated careers ever – you moved through the ranks of MI6 faster than anyone, you were transferred to the CIA before you even turned twenty-five, and you are on a track to nothing but success. Why would you want to give that up? Because of that little mishap in Moscow?"_

"_Mishap? Milah, I was stabbed in the chest twice, I almost bled to death. When it happened all I could think about was Bae – what would happen if Bae lost me? I know what it's like to lose a parent as a child, Milah, I do NOT want Bae to have to go through that." Gold said. "And heaven knows you wouldn't give a damn – you'd probably marry the next man that looks twice at you. You never loved me. I'm not even convinced you like Bae all that much, you're not exactly the maternal type."_

"_How dare you imply that I don't love my son?" Milah asked angrily. _

"_You don't love anyone but yourself. You have no concept of the word. Even poor little Emma, the child had no home, no family, and you couldn't show her the least bit of compassion."_

"_Oh good god, that was three years ago Ian, let it go. You only wanted to take her in because you felt guilty for killing her parents." Milah said._

"_I LOVED that child. BAE loved that child. I would have been glad to be her father – proud to be. You just don't want me to have any happiness in my life, that's your problem. It has to be all about you." Gold picked up a pillow and stood up._

"_Where are you going?" Milah asked._

"_To my study." Gold replied. "Like you'll even miss me. Why don't you ring up one of your little boyfriends that I know you're cheating on me with, you really think I'm stupid enough not to know about that?" Gold headed out of the room._

"_Yes, be a coward, Ian. Run away from your problems, that's what you do best." Milah said. Gold stormed out of the room, slamming the door behind him._

* * *

Belle waited nervously in the room hidden behind the wall. She sat trembling, crouched in a corner as she heard footsteps coming from inside the room she was in. "Belle." she heard a voice whisper. Belle breathed a sigh of relief as she stood up. She ran over to Emma and hugged her. "You okay?" Emma asked. Belle nodded. "I couldn't get ahold of security; cell reception isn't always good where they are, unfortunately. But it's okay, we'll take care of things." Belle looked up to see an older woman standing next to Emma – she had gray hair and Belle guessed that she was likely in her early 70's. "Belle, this is Gwendolyn Potts – I just picked her up from the airport."

"You're Mrs. Potts. It's nice to meet you." Belle said.

"You too, dear." Mrs. Potts replied with a thick cockney accent.

"Alright, enough with the introductions, let's go see what's going on." Emma said. She headed out of the room, and Mrs. Potts followed. Belle followed behind them. "What are you doing?"

"I'm going with you." Belle said.

"Right. No you're not. You stay here." Emma said.

"Well, why does she get to go?" Belle asked. Emma started to laugh.

"Are you kidding? Gwen's been an agent for over fifty years, she knows what she's doing more than anyone." Emma said. "Just stay here – if anything happens to you, Gold will kill me."

"He'll be fine dear, don't you worry." Mrs. Potts said, and Belle watched as the two of them left the room. As soon as they were out of sight, she ignored their orders and followed behind them.

Archie Hopper cried out in pain as Gold's cane came down upon him. "Now – would you like to try again?" Gold asked.

"If I tell you she'll kill him." Archie said.

"Again – still not a good answer." Gold said, and he raised up his cane.

"Regina Mills!" Archie screamed. "It was Regina Mills!" Gold sat back down, straddling the chair once again.

"Well – that's more like it." Gold said. He reached onto the table for his gun and pointed it at Archie. "Alright – little bug man – where is she?"

"I don't know." Archie said, practically in tears.

"Do not lie to me!" Gold screamed, and stood up and lunged for Archie, and put the gun up to his forehead.

"I swear I don't know." Archie said. "She found me. M – My father – she threatened to have him killed. He's an old man, he's sick – I needed help taking care of him, the money she gave me pays for his medical bills. If she finds out you know she'll kill him."

"So you offer up Belle instead." Gold said. "Give me one good reason why I shouldn't just put a bullet in your head right now."

"How about because your girlfriend is upstairs freaking out right now because she woke up and heard the commotion down here?" Emma said from behind. Gold turned and looked up at her.

"Put the gun down, dear." Mrs. Potts said, entering the room. Gold turned and looked back at Archie.

"No – no, he has to die. He can't get away with what he did to Belle, he has to die." Gold said.

"Please. I'll tell you anything you want to know, please." Archie begged.

"You don't want to do this, dear. You're not thinking clearly right now." Mrs. Potts said.

"Belle has to leave because of him. It's HIS FAULT!" Gold screamed, and he grabbed Archie by the neck and began to choke him.

"He's being dealt with, you can't do this dear, this isn't how you handle things." Mrs. Potts said.

"Gold, if you have one more slip up they are going to send you away and you'll never see the light of day again, is that what you want?" Emma asked. Gold let go of Archie's neck and the man gasped for breath. Gold still held the gun at Archie's temple.

"Ian?" he heard Belle's voice say from behind him. Emma and Mrs. Potts both turned around and looked at her.

"I told you to stay upstairs." Emma said, gritting her teeth at Belle angrily. Belle ignored her and moved toward Gold.

"Ian – please don't do this. This isn't who you are, you don't want to hurt him." Belle said as she got closer to him.

"It's his fault. You're not safe because of him. He has to die." Gold said, not looking back at her.

"No – no he doesn't. And you don't want him to. That's not who you are, you're a good man, Ian. I see it. You don't want to hurt him, I know you don't. Please prove to me that I'm right." Belle said, and she reached for him and put her hand on Gold's shoulder. Gold shivered and his hand began to tremble. He turned and looked at Belle, the gun still in his hand. Emma walked around to the side of him just as Gold let go of the gun; Emma caught the gun before it fell to the ground. Gold reached for Belle and held onto her tightly. "It's okay. Everything okay now." Belle said as she ran her fingers through his hair. "Come on – I'm going to take you back upstairs, alright?" Belle put her arm around him and led him out of the room.

* * *

Gold sat on the edge of the bed, still trembling a bit. Belle walked over to him with a glass of water. "Here – drink some water, alright?" Belle said. Gold nodded and took a drink.

"I'm sorry." Gold whispered after he finished.

"We'll talk about it in the morning." Belle said. "Come on, you're shaking. Lie down." Belle helped him lie back as Mrs. Potts entered the room.

"Is Dr. Hopper alright?" Belle asked.

"He'll be fine. Emma is taking care of him." Mrs. Potts said as she walked over to the same side of the bed that Belle was sitting on. She sat down on the bed and took Gold's hand. "I thought we had talked about this before I left, dear. You were doing so much better, why would you do that?"

"I don't want Belle to leave. I thought if I got him to talk – I could finally find her. Then Belle could stay." Gold said. Mrs. Potts turned and looked at Belle, then looked back at Gold.

"Why don't I go make you some nice warm tea? I think you and this young lady have a few things to discuss." Mrs. Potts said, and she got up and left the room.

"I thought she was just your housekeeper." Belle said. "Emma said she's – an agent." Gold nodded.

"Gwen has been my partner for – over twenty-five years. She was my trainer, and my mentor – taught me everything I know." Gold said.

"She seems like a lot more than that. She took care of you, didn't she? All these years." Belle said, and Gold nodded.

"No one else wanted to. She was stuck with me." Gold said. "I finally talked her into retiring four months ago. She'd been wanting to go back to England one more time. Tried to get me to go with her, but – I just wasn't ready for that. After I lost Bae – she was the only one who was there. She took care of me. She retired from active duty and – stayed here with me." Gold was quiet for a few moments, then spoke up again. "Belle, I – I wasn't cut out for active duty. I never wanted that, I just wanted work behind the scenes, like I do now. The agency offered it to me and I wanted to turn them down but my wife, she – she pushed me into it. Said it would give me better chances for advancement if I did my time in the field. She said – she said if I didn't do it I was a coward, and my boy would know that his father was a coward."

"Ian. You're not a coward." Belle said as she touched his face.

"I had to do things, Belle – I had to see and do things that I never wanted to see or do and it – changed me into – well, into this. And I had to get out. I couldn't do it anymore, Belle – I just couldn't do it anymore." Gold said, his voice trembling. Belle pulled him into a hug.

"You can tell me anything, you know that." Belle said.

"You asked about my leg the other day. I didn't want you to see it." Gold said. "Because that's how it all started. Everything I am today – the monster that I've become – all started because of that. Because of what I did."

* * *

_Twenty-two years ago . . . . . . _

_Gold and Mrs. Potts stood in an alley in downtown Boston. "You're sure this is where they're gathering?" Gold asked._

"_Have I ever been wrong before?" Mrs. Potts asked. "Any progress on – getting your assignment switched?"_

"_No." Gold replied. _

"_I'm so sorry, dear. I tried to talk them out of it, but – you know how they are." Mrs. Potts said. "You passed the psych eval, they said. Not a thing wrong with you."_

"_Yes, well I don't want to be labeled as mentally unstable, then I'll never work." Gold said._

"_You're just not meant to be out in the field, dear. That says nothing bad about you, you're a brilliant man and one of our best agents. You're just more cut out to be behind the scenes and that's fine." Mrs. Potts said. _

"_Too bad they didn't take my leg out or something in Moscow, then they'd have to take me off of active duty." Gold said. They heard a noise coming from inside the building. _

"_I'll go around the front, just in case. You can handle things back here?" Mrs. Potts asked._

"_It's just a small cell we're breaking up, what's the worst that can happen?" Gold asked. _

"_Be back in five minutes." Mrs. Potts said, and she went around to the front of the building. Gold stood by himself in the alley, his gun aimed and ready. He watched as a door leading out to the alley opened and a tall man stepped out, his back to Gold._

"_Turn around. Hands up." Gold said, pointing his gun at the man. The man turned around slowly, and raised his hand up, pointing his own gun directly at Gold. Before the man could even fire, Gold lifted up his gun and shot the man directly in the temple. The tall man collapsed to the ground. Gold looked down at him for a moment, shaking. Still pointing his gun at the man, he moved toward him. Gold bent down and checked the man for a pulse – there was none. He was dead. The man's gun lay at his side. Gold glanced at the man's gun for a moment. He hesitated for only one second, then he pulled his sleeves down and picked up the man's gun, placing it in the dead man's hand. Still shaking a bit, he sat down on the ground next to the man, and maneuvered the gun in the man's hand. He pointed the gun at the front of his own right leg, manipulated the dead man's finger to pull the trigger, and fired. Gold screamed out in pain, then pointed the gun once again, this time at the ankle. He fired another shot directly into his own ankle, then let out a loud, pained scream. _


	15. Chapter 15

_Thank you for your patience with me! Have more time to write now and get caught up with this and my other fics! _

_Next chapter will probably be a significant amount of flashbacks - they will be needed to move this story forward. Hope you like the twist in this one! :)_

_Thank you for those who leave feedback, I can't tell you how much I appreciate it, please keep it coming! _

_I do not own 'Once Upon a Time.'_

**_Chapter 15_**

_Twenty two years ago . . . . . . . _

_Mrs. Potts entered Gold's hospital room carrying a stack of magazines. "Hello, dear. How are you feeling?" she asked as she sat the magazines down on his nightstand, then sat down in the chair next to his bed. _

"_Alright. Considering." Gold said. "They said I um – I'll need one more surgery. They don't think I'll be able to walk any longer without a cane." _

"_Well then I suppose you won't be going on assignment any time soon, will you?" Mrs. Potts asked. _

"_Don't need my leg to do surveillance." Gold said. _

"_No, you don't." Mrs. Potts said, and she took his hand. "Ian – I got ahold of the forensics report before it went out to the main office. That man, he – he wasn't shot at close range. That was a distance shot. There is no way that you and he struggled on the ground, Ian. There's no way that he shot you in the leg and in the ankle, and then you fired into his skull at close range. Now would you like to tell me what really happened so that I can make sure no one finds out?" Gold looked down sadly. _

"_I couldn't do it anymore, Gwen. It was the only way I could get out." Gold said, his voice trembling. "They wouldn't listen to me. They said I was too valuable in the field. I just wanted to be with my son." Gold began to sob. Mrs. Potts pulled him into a hug._

"_Oh, Ian. Oh, my dear boy. It's alright. No one will know – no one will find out, I promise." she said._

* * *

Belle entered the kitchen carrying the mug that Mrs. Potts had brought up earlier for Gold. Mrs. Potts was tidying up the kitchen, and she looked up at Belle. "How is he, then?" Mrs. Potts asked.

"He just fell asleep. That tea relaxed him quite a bit." Belle said.

"Herbal tea with chamomile and valerian. It's always helped him, he – he has some pretty bad bouts with insomnia at times." Mrs. Potts said.

"Are you staying here tonight?" Belle asked.

"Well, it is getting late and I'm a bit jet lagged so – if you don't mind, I'll stay downstairs – that is – I presume that you'll be spending the night with Ian." Mrs. Potts said. Belle blushed a bit. "Oh, it's fine dear – Emma filled me in."

"I didn't plan for this to happen, you know." Belle said. "I'm still not sure why it did."

"We can't help who we fall in love with. Love finds us, not the other way around." Mrs. Potts said. "Ian is a good man – I've been trying for years to help him, but – I was starting to think he was going to be cursed to spending the rest of his life in this house. You must be someone very special – he's not an easy man to love."

"He told me about his leg. What he did." Belle said. "He thinks it makes him a coward."

"Let me tell you something. Ian is anything but a coward. He did what he did for his son. Oh, if you could only have seen him with that boy. Such a good papa he was. That child was his whole world. He would have done anything for that boy." Mrs. Potts said.

"What about the boy's mother? Ian's wife. He doesn't speak very kindly of her." Belle said.

"Well, the less said about that woman the better as far as I'm concerned. Didn't like her from the day I met her. Bossy, snobbish, and when it came to their son – I've had house cats with a better maternal instinct." Mrs. Potts said. "The feeling was mutual – she never much cared for me, either."

"Well, I – I know how important you are to Ian. I hope we can be friends." Belle said.

"I don't see a problem with that at all." Mrs. Potts said. "The way you talked Ian down today – in twenty years, no one has ever been able to do that. Not even me." Emma entered the room.

"Well, Hopper's fine. A few bruises and a little shaken up but given that he knows Gold's history he said he's not going to press charges or anything. We're getting him set up in a protection situation right now." Emma said.

"Any good reason he gave for turning on Ian?" Mrs. Potts asked.

"Apparently his father has been ill, and he's been struggling with keeping up with the medical bills. My guess is Regina had her eye on him for quite some time, cause he was clean when I found him and hooked him up with Gold. She used his dad to get to him. Threatened to kill him and his father if he didn't cooperate." Emma said.

"Why didn't he tell Ian?" Belle asked.

"He was probably desperate. People do rash things when they're desperate sometimes." Emma said. "Anyway – Gold paid off the guards on duty tonight to get Hopper in here, so – you might want to have a little chat with them. And him." Emma said, then she turned and looked at Belle. "You should probably get some sleep – our plane leaves at one in the afternoon."

"I'm not going anywhere." Belle said.

"We're leaving for England tomorrow." Emma told her. "It's a done deal."

"I'm not leaving Ian. He needs me right now." Belle said.

"He'll be fine." Emma said.

"No." Belle replied. "The witness protection program – it's voluntary, isn't it?" Belle asked.

"Well, technically yeah but -" Emma began.

"Well, then I'm un-volunteering." Belle said. "I'm staying here."

"Staying here was part of the arrangement to protect you. If you leave the program, you don't get to stay here." Emma said.

"This is Ian's house, isn't it? I believe he decides who stays and who doesn't." Belle replied.

"Emma – I think that Belle may be right. I don't think it's a good idea for her to leave." Mrs. Potts said.

"The agency can't protect her here forever, they need her somewhere more secure." Emma said.

"I can pull a few strings. At least for – I don't know, maybe a month or so." Mrs. Potts said. "I'll stay here too. I think she's good for him." Mrs. Potts smiled at Belle. "If you don't mind staying put in the house, dear – I think we can manage keeping you here."

"I think I'll be fine. It's not forever, right?" Belle said. "I've already started talking to Ian about – getting on with his life, and he's been receptive to it. He wants to try. He's broken his routine a few times, with his meals and what he wears."

"Well, that's wonderful – that's more than I've been able to get him to do, and heaven knows I've tried." Mrs. Potts said. "You should probably get off to bed, it's getting a bit late." Mrs. Potts said to Belle. "Let him sleep however late he likes tomorrow – he needs the rest."

"I will." Belle said. "I'll see you tomorrow then."

"Goodnight, dear." Mrs. Potts said, and Belle left the room. Emma glared at Mrs. Potts.

"Do you really think that Regina Mills and whoever is pulling her strings is going sit back and not act when they know damn well that she's here?" Emma asked angrily.

"Oh, not at all. I fully expect them to do something. Sometimes, dear – in order to catch a rat – you need bait." Mrs. Potts said.

"You are NOT seriously using Belle as bait. You want to see Gold have a fit, you tell him that, tonight's little display will be nothing in comparison." Emma said.

"Not using her, dear, just – changing the game plan. And I have no intention of that girl being harmed. Ian obviously cares for her a great deal and he would be devastated and I wouldn't do a thing to hurt him, you know that. But by keeping Belle here – it'll throw them off. They're expecting for us to move her. They're planning for it. They won't know what to do when we don't." Mrs. Potts said. "Don't forget, dear – I've been doing this far longer than you have. Everything will be fine."

"They have my son." Emma said. "You don't know what it's like. I took this job to give Henry a good life. I did everything I could to keep him out of danger. All I care about is Henry. They have him – and I want him back. You don't know what it's like to be separated from your son. I've missed a year of his life already. I'll be damned if I'm missing any more." Emma said.

"I understand, Emma. I understand more than you realize." Mrs. Potts said. "I promise you – you will never miss another birthday with your boy. I give you my word."

* * *

Gold awoke the next morning, and he rolled over and looked over at his clock – it was a little after eleven in the morning. He sat up quickly and gasped. "No. Belle, no." he said to himself. He began to tremble a bit, and was stunned when Belle entered the room.

"Hey – good morning." Belle said, going to his side and sitting down next to him. "You feel better today?" she asked as she touched his cheek gently.

"You're still here. You were supposed to leave." Gold said.

"Well, I'm staying. At least for a bit longer." Belle said.

"No. No, it's too dangerous Belle, you have to go." Gold said.

"Mrs. Potts said she can pull some strings – she said I'll be fine." Belle said. "I don't want to leave you, Ian. Not now."

"I'm sorry, Belle. I'm sorry about last night." Gold said. "I just – I was angry, because I didn't want you to go."

"He's going to be alright, Hopper." Belle said. "And I'm not going anywhere." Belle pulled him into a hug.

"I thought I heard voices." Mrs. Potts said, peeking into the room. "Good morning, dear."

"Good morning." Gold said.

"How about I get you something to eat? Breakfast or lunch?" Belle asked.

"How about you surprise me." Gold said. Belle smiled at him.

"Okay. Be right back." Belle said. She smiled happily at Mrs. Potts as she left. Mrs. Potts walked over to Gold's side and sat down next to him.

"She's a lovely girl." Mrs. Potts said.

"Yes." Gold replied.

"Far too good for the likes of you." Mrs. Potts teased.

"I know that." Gold said, and he looked up at her.

"I remember that look." Mrs. Potts said.

"What look?" Gold asked.

"Love. You used to look at Bae just the same way." Mrs. Potts said.

"I don't know what you're planning but – please make sure that she doesn't get hurt." Gold said to her.

"You know I won't let that happen, dear. I'll fill you in on everything later. I um – I found some information while I was back in England." Mrs. Potts said. "I think I have a good lead on where the boy is."

"You were supposed to be retired, not working." Gold said.

"I'll retire when I'm dead." Mrs. Potts said. "What, you think I came back here just to look after you? I've done enough of that, and that pretty young girl seems to be doing a better job of it than I ever did. She's nothing like Milah, thank god, I'd probably have to kill her if she were." Gold laughed a bit.

"Do you think I can do it, Gwen? Be a normal man again?" Gold asked.

"Well, I don't see why not. Love – is very powerful magic, my boy. The most powerful magic that there is. If you love that girl, and you truly want truly want to leave this cursed life for her – then it'll happen." Gwen said.

"Leaving here means letting him go, doesn't it?" Gold asked. "I don't want to let him go. How can I, after what I did?"

"Ian, did you ever think that – maybe he wants you to let him go? Maybe that's why the girl is here – he wants you to love again. He wants you to move on with your life." Mrs. Potts said. "Something I've tried to tell you for the last two decades, but – I don't think I'm the one you needed to hear it from. It needed to come from within you. Now come on – go get yourself a shower before she comes back up here, make yourself look nice for her."

"She's already seen me at my worst. If that hasn't scared her off, I don't think anything will." Gold said.

"Well, you don't want to take that chance, do you?" Mrs. Potts asked. "Go on – off with you." Gold smiled at her, stood up, and walked toward the bathroom. Mrs. Potts moved toward the hallway just as Belle came up the stairs. "He's in the shower, dear. He'll be right out."

"I made him a hamburger – I'll take it in the study, he'll probably prefer to eat in there." Belle said.

"You got him to eat hamburgers then?" Mrs. Potts asked, following Belle into the study.

"Yes, he likes them." Belle said.

"I know he does – used to take his boy out for them all the time." Mrs. Potts said. She walked over to Gold's spinning wheel and stood next to it.

"I didn't know that." Belle said, watching her. "He's really good at that, you know. Spinning."

"I know." Mrs. Potts said.

"He made all the rugs in the house." Belle said. "He told me that his mum started teaching him when he was a boy, and he kept at it."

"He's always been very talented at many things." Mrs. Potts said.

"Oh, I forgot ketchup! He likes ketchup on his hamburger – I'll be right back." Belle said, and she darted out of the room. Mrs. Potts put her hand on the spinning wheel and moved it back and forth. She sighed as a single tear fell down her cheek.


	16. Chapter 16

_Thought I'd get one more up before the holidays get into full swing. Lots of flashbacks in this one. Enjoy, and as always, feedback is much appreciated! _

_I do not own 'Once Upon a Time.'_

**_Chapter 16_**

"I'm so glad you're staying." Gold said, as he held Belle close to him, the two of them lying in bed together.

"Me too." Belle replied.

"And I don't want you to worry about a thing. You are very safe here. If Gwen says that she has everything taken of care of you can be assured of that." Gold said.

"The two of you seem very close. How long have you known her?" Belle asked.

"I was partnered with her over twenty-eight years ago – though it – sometimes it feels like I've known her my whole life. Aside from Bae and – now you – she's the only person I ever felt really cared about me." Gold told her.

"So what happened after you hurt your leg?" Belle asked. "I mean, now that I'm here – we have time to get to know one another. We can tell each other more stories."

"It was – well, things didn't exactly work out as I had anticipated. In fact they got worse – much worse." Gold told her.

* * *

_Twenty two years ago . . . . . . . _

"_Papa!" Bae cried out as Gold entered the house, with Mrs. Potts behind him carrying his bag. Gold was using crutches, his right leg heavily bandaged. _

"_Bae. Oh, I missed you so much." Gold said as the boy latched onto him and hugged him._

"_Did you get the pictures I made you, papa?" Bae asked._

"_Oh, I got every one of them, they were fantastic." Gold said. "Come on - let's go into the living room so I can sit down." Gold said, and Bae happily led him to the living room. Mrs. Potts set the bag down in the hallway and followed them. As soon as Gold sat down, Bae grabbed a piece of paper off of one of the end tables and then jumped onto the sofa with him. _

"_I made this for you today." Bae said, and he handed the paper to Gold. It was a drawing of the two of them together._

"_My goodness, another masterpiece. I believe we have a future famous artist here, Gwen." Gold said, and he looked up at Mrs. Potts and smiled as Bae hugged him. _

"_When will your leg be better, papa?" Bae asked. _

"_Well – it'll be at least another month before all of the bandages come off. And then I'll have to do therapy." Gold said._

"_What's that?" Bae asked._

"_Exercises. To help my leg get strong again." Gold said. "But it's – it's not ever going to be all better. I won't be able to run with you anymore, Bae. I won't be able to play ball with you or ride bikes – I'm sorry." _

"_It's okay, papa. We can still play other games, right? Video games, and other stuff." Bae said._

"_That's right – we can certainly do that." Gold said. _

"_And we can still go to Granny's for hamburgers." Bae said. _

"_Tell you what – how about I take the two of you out there today? Would you like that?" Mrs. Potts asked, chiming in. _

"_Bailey isn't going anywhere today. He has homework to finish and he's spent far too much time this afternoon wasting it away drawing his ridiculous pictures." Milah said as she entered the room. "I need to talk to your father, Bae. Go upstairs, do your homework." Mrs. Potts glared at Milah in anger._

"_Come on love – I'll help you. Let's see if we can get done so that we can still go out for burgers tonight." Mrs. Potts said, and she led Bae out of the room, glaring at Milah the entire time. _

"_Lovely of you to visit me while I was in hospital Milah – oh that's right, you couldn't fit that into your busy schedule, could you." Gold asked as Milah sat down next to him. _

"_Well, I hope you're happy. You're going to be stuck now – just another computer hack holed up watching other people actually work." Milah said._

"_The agency said I can teach. I should be done with therapy by the time the next group of trainees come into the program. I'll be in Virginia three days a week for three months so you'll still be rid of me half the time if that's what you're worried about." Gold said. "It would probably be more convenient if I relocated to the DC area but I know you're not interested in that." _

"_I have no interest in leaving Storybrooke." Milah said._

"_Of course you don't, you're the queen here, why would you want to move somewhere else and be a mere peasant?" Gold asked. "I plan to take Bae with me the week he's on spring break."_

"_You're not taking my son out of state for an entire week." Milah said._

"_He's my son too. And what will you do while I'm gone? You'll ship him up to his room for the day and leave him with a sitter while you go off to do god knows what – or who." Gold said. "I'll only be teaching four hours a day, I'll arrange for a sitter during that time. The rest of the time, I'm taking Bae to see the city – show him where I work, take him to the monuments, the White House – give him the grand tour, I think he's old enough to appreciate. You're welcome to come along, Milah but – well, we both know that you have no interest in spending time with me. It's five months away – I'm telling you now so that you'll be done stewing over it when the time comes." Milah just glared at him. "I won't be able to get upstairs for a while, so would you be kind enough to bring some of my things down here? I'll be sleeping in here for now. Not that you'll miss me in our bed or anything." _

"_Why don't you just leave me, Ian? I know you want to." Milah said._

"_Because I'm not giving you the satisfaction, dearie. You're the one who wanted me to come to America, and I did. You're the one who pushed me to apply for citizenship so that I could transfer here officially from MI6 to CIA, so I did. You're the one who wanted me on active duty, because it was a lucrative career move, and I did it. And now you've decided you're bored with me, and I guarantee you the feeling is quite mutual. But under no circumstances will I leave my son. If you want to leave me – please do. I have provided for my child both financially and emotionally and Bae is old enough to testify to a family court judge as to who is the better parent. And thanks to all of your efforts to settle me here as an official Yank and government employee, I have enough connections to be heard in a court by a judge that is completely impartial and isn't in your back pocket or – various other places." _

"_I wonder what this impartial judge would think of your little 'accident' on the job that really wasn't an accident after all." Milah said, and she gave him a smug look. "You're not the only one who has connections, Ian. Don't forget that." Milah flitted out of the room as Gold watched her silently, a nervous look coming over his face._

* * *

"Ian – I really don't want to speak ill of the dead, but – your wife, she sounds horrid. What did you ever see in someone like that?" Belle asked.

"I was just a young lad, Belle. Barely nineteen. And as you pointed out before – a bit of a nerd. I was at university in London studying computer science. Not exactly a field that attracts the ladies. My mates and I – we made an interesting discovery though. There were lots of Yanks that came over from the states to study abroad. And um – well, for some reason, they seem to like the accent. We figured it was our best shot so – well, we were all quite into statistics and whatnot and after surveying the numbers on those studying abroad we found that there was this little art school in London that attracted quite a few girls from well-to-do families in the states. It wasn't very well-known and fairly untapped territory. So we found their hang-outs – pubs, cafes, that sort of thing. That's how I met Milah. She was a bit older than me, had just turned twenty – we went out several times. She was nice enough back then. Pleasant, even. We got on fine. Unfortunately – we weren't very careful and – well, she ended up pregnant. So I offered to marry her and – she said yes. Didn't expect her to, to be honest."

"We went back to the states for the wedding and – that's when I found out the truth about her family – the Story family." Gold said.

"Story? As in Storybrooke?" Belle asked.

"Oh, yes. Her great-great-great – oh, I don't know how many greats, I lost count, but anyway – her several times great grandfather established this town back in the days of the revolutionary war. It was a fishing port primarily, and the family came from English money. Shady lot, from what I've heard. Even rumors that several of them were traitors, and fought with the Brits in the revolution." Gold said. "Anyhow – her family owned this town. And they still did. Only ones left when I met Milah were her and her father. He passed away about a year after Bae was born. After we married, we went back to London so that I could finish school. When Bae was about two years old, I was approached by MI6. I don't even know how they got in contact with me, but – well, they're MI6, they can do things like that. I was always a top student and – they were in need of computer workers. Surveillance agents. Computers were becoming more and more mainline and they wanted some young minds who knew what they were doing, and apparently I qualified."

"Well, I really didn't think it was smart to turn down MI6, so – I went to work for them. It was supposed to be surveillance work, but – about a year into my employment they started talking about sending me out into the field. That's when they partnered me with Gwen. She worked for both MI6 and CIA – her mum was American, her dad was from England and she had dual citizenship, so she used that to her advantage. That's how the idea got planted in Milah's head – she had been itching to go back to the states, and figured if I got my citizenship, I could get transferred in with the CIA easily. She had the connections and – well, we were having some struggles by then and I just wanted to make her happy."

"Did you love her?" Belle asked.

"Thought I did." Gold replied. "In hindsight? Probably not. But she did give me Bae. I wouldn't have traded him for anything. I just wish – I just wish things had – ended differently than they did."

* * *

_Twenty-two years ago, about three months after Gold's leg injury . . . . _

_Bae and Gold sat down together in the booth at Granny's. Gold set his cane down next to him inside the booth; he had been getting around quite well since he began therapy. "So – are we going to try anything new today, or will it be the usual?" Mrs. Lucas asked as she approached their table._

"_Usual!" Bae shouted, practically bouncing in his seat. _

"_Two burgers, coming up. Ketchup and extra pickles." Mrs. Lucas said, and she walked away. _

"_How many more weeks till our trip, Papa?" Bae asked excitedly._

"_Six and a half." Gold replied. "Getting excited, are you?"_

"_Will I really get to meet the President?" Bae asked. _

"_Well, we get to tour his house. If he's there – I'm sure you'll get to see him." Gold replied. _

"_We get to go to the airplane museum, right? You promised!" Bae said._

"_That will be our first stop, I guarantee it." Gold said. "We'll have a very good time, Bae."_

"_Papa – is it wrong if I'm not sad that mama isn't coming with us?" Bae asked. "She's not fun like you." _

"_Well, your mum is – a very different person than I am. I did ask her to come, but – she thought it would be good for us to have a trip on our own." Gold said, hoping that his son wouldn't realize he had just told a lie. "Maybe we'll find something else for her to join us in. Something that all of us will enjoy." Mrs. Lucas brought them their food and they ate their dinner together and continued their conversation. After she took their plates, Mrs. Lucas approached their table. _

"_So – any dessert today? I've got fresh cherry cobbler." Mrs. Lucas said. Just as she said this, a group of men entered the restaurant. Among the men was a tall, dark-haired man that Bae immediately stared at. _

"_No thank you." Bae said, his entire demeanor changing._

"_It's not like you to turn down cherry cobbler, Bailey. What's wrong?" Mrs. Lucas asked. _

"_Nothing. I'm just full." Bae said. _

"_Well, okay then. Maybe next time." Mrs. Lucas said, and she walked away. Gold couldn't help but notice Bae staring at the man who had just come in with his friends. _

"_Who is that, Bae?" Gold asked. _

"_That's Mr. Jones." Bae said. "He and mama are friends."_

"_Are they?" Gold asked._

"_He comes over sometimes – when you're not home." Bae said, and he looked down sadly. _

"_Bae – what's wrong?" Gold asked. _

"_I saw him and mama kissing once. She doesn't know that I saw, I was supposed to be in my room." Bae said. _

"_I see." Gold said. "You stay right here, Bae. Be right back." Gold picked up his cane, stood up, and walked over to the man and his group of friends. "Excuse me." Gold said, interrupting their frivolity. He looked straight at the man that Bae had identified as Mr. Jones._

"_What do you want?" Jones asked. _

"_Well, I thought I'd come over to introduce myself. Name is Gold. Ian Gold." Gold said. Jones looked him up and down._

"_You're Ian Gold? You're a lot taller than I thought you'd be." Jones said, and the rest of the men started to laugh. _

"_Listen – I am fully aware of my wife's indiscretions. I have no problem turning a blind eye to them, but – not when they involve my son." Gold said. "If you and Milah want to carry on, you'll do it in a more discreet manner. Not at my house – and not when my boy is there. Are we clear on that?"_

"_Well perhaps if you gave your wife what she wanted she wouldn't have to be bringing other men to HER house. Not yours." Jones said. "And I'll see Milah whenever – and wherever I like." Jones said, getting in his face. Gold lifted up his cane and shoved it under the man's neck as Jones gasped for breath. _

"_And I said – not when my boy is there." Gold said angrily. He shoved Jones roughly back into his seat. _

"_You know – I usually don't fight invalids, but – I think I'll make an exception in your case." Jones said. He stood up, grabbed Gold by the collar and threw him against the wall. Gold fell to the floor, his cane falling on the ground._

"_Papa!" Bae screamed, and he ran to Gold's side._

"_I'm alright, Bae. It's fine." Gold said, sitting up._

"_Alright, that's enough. Get out – all of you." Mrs. Lucas said to Jones and his group of friends. Jones sneered at Gold while Bae was helping him stand back up. _

"_We're not done." Jones said, and he and his entourage left in a huff. _

* * *

"Is that the man your wife left you for?" Belle asked.

"Yeah. Killian Jones. He worked in the shipyards as a foreman. Total bastard. He was my first problem. My second problem came along once I started teaching at the CIA headquarters." Gold said.

* * *

_Five months after Gold's injury, at CIA headquarters . . . . . . _

_Gold was in his third week of teaching the new group of trainees. He limped down the hallway and heard footsteps running behind him. "Mr. Gold!" a girl's voice cried out to him. Gold stopped and turned around. _

"_Yes?" Gold asked her. _

"_I don't think you were very fair to me in class today." the girl said. She had dark brown hair and a very serious look about her._

"_I was perfectly fair. You had a task to perform and you failed. I don't see what the problem is." Gold said._

"_You didn't give me another chance." the girl said._

"_Do you think you'll get another chance out in the field? What fairy tale land are you living in?" Gold asked. _

"_Well – maybe you can teach me." the girl said. "This has been my dream my entire life."_

"_To work for the CIA? You need better dreams than that, dearie." Gold said. "How old are you?"_

"_Nineteen." the girl replied. "I know what you're thinking – I finished school early. I've never failed anything in my life. Not until your class."_

"_Oh, you're one of those." Gold said. "So was I – it takes more than being a prodigy to impress me, dearie." he said, and he turned to walk away. _

"_Please. I'll do anything." the girl said. Gold stopped and turned around. _

"_My son is coming to stay with me next week. I'll need a sitter while I'm teaching." Gold said._

"_I could do that. I love kids." the girl said._

"_He could probably sit in my office during your class but the other classes you would watch him." Gold said. _

"_How old is he?" the girl asked._

"_Eight and a half." Gold replied. "He's a good boy, won't be any trouble. You do this favor for me – and I'll help you." _

"_Oh, thank you. I'll be your best student ever, I promise you won't regret it." the girl said._

"_Well, that remains to be seen." Gold said. "You'll have to forgive me, I'm not the best with names, what was your first name again?" _

"_Regina. Regina Mills." she said, and she smiled at him with excitement. _


	17. Chapter 17

_One more before the holiday! Probably won't have another chapter up till the weekend, and I actually may focus on my other fic for a bit. Enjoy! Thank you for all of your kind feedback . . . . please keep it coming!_

_I do not own "Once Upon a Time."_

**_Chapter 17_**

Gold and Belle entered the dining room together, holding hands and smiling at one another. "Well, good morning to both of you." Mrs. Potts said as she entered the room upon hearing them. "I have a nice breakfast all ready for you."

"Gwen, you don't have to do that, Belle and I can handle the cooking." Gold said. "You're retired."

"Are you implying that I'm old, dear? I may not be a young girl anymore but I can make myself useful about the house." Mrs. Potts said.

"It's really very sweet of you, Mrs. Potts, thank you." Belle said.

"You're very welcome. And you can call me Gwen, you know." Mrs. Potts said.

"Well, at least let me help you bring things out – Gwen." Belle said. "Ian, just stay here, we'll take care of everything."

"Right. You're going into the kitchen to talk about me." Gold said. Belle just smiled at him. "I'll get the coffee cups out." Belle and Mrs. Potts went into the kitchen together.

"I haven't seen him that happy in years. Not since Bae was here." Mrs. Potts commented. "I think he's going to be fine once all of this is over."

"You really think he'll be willing to leave? I love him, Mrs. – I mean, Gwen, but – I have to admit I've thought about – what if he doesn't want to leave." Belle said.

"He knows that. Dear – he had a really hard time of it after he lost Bae. I don't know how much he's told you yet, but – just be patient with him. I'm honestly amazed at how far he's come since I left. Give him time. Don't give up on him – please." Mrs. Potts said.

"I won't." Belle told her. "I know he puts on this tough façade, but – I can tell he's very fragile. I'm trying not to push him too hard."

"You give him the strength he needs." Mrs. Potts said. "That's what's been missing all these years. The kind of strength that comes from true love. I can give him support and I have but – he needed someone like you and I was certain he would never find that, not locked away like he has been. I'm not glad for what happened and for what you saw, but – I am glad that you came here."

"Me too." Belle said.

"Well, come on, let's get breakfast out there before it gets cold." Mrs. Potts said, and she and Belle took the plates out into the dining room, where Gold was waiting.

"Oh, this looks wonderful Gwen." Gold said as Belle set a plate in front of him.

"It really does." Belle agreed. Mrs. Potts took the coffee pot and picked up Gold's cup.

"Let me get you another cup dear, this one is chipped." Mrs. Potts said.

"No – I want to use that one." Gold said. "It's – special to me." Mrs. Potts looked at him with a puzzled look.

"I dropped it." Belle said as she sat down at the table next to Gold and took his hand. "When I first came here. And um – he didn't get angry at me. I thought he was making fun of me when he kept using it, but – he was reminding himself that he could control his temper when he wanted to." Belle beamed a huge smile at him.

"There are but a few things that I truly cherish in this house, most of them in Bae's room, but this cup – I truly cherish this cup. It reminds me that I can be a better man – for myself and for Belle." Gold said.

"Well, that's wonderful, dear. You two enjoy your breakfast, I won't bother you any longer." Mrs. Potts said.

"Gwen, you're not a bother, sit down with us." Gold said.

"It's alright dear, I already ate." Mrs. Potts said. "Besides I have some work to do upstairs, and I'll need you to be joining me as soon as you're done. I'm sorry to steal him away from you dear." she said as she looked over at Belle.

"It's okay – I'll find some more books in the library to keep me busy." Belle said.

"The library? I thought you closed that off." Mrs. Potts said.

"Belle loves to read. No sense in all of those books sitting there gathering dust any longer." Gold said.

"Well – alright then." Mrs. Potts said, and she walked behind Gold and gave him a hug. "Very proud of you, dear. See you upstairs in a bit." Mrs. Potts left the room.

"What was that about?" Belle asked.

"There was a reason I had the library locked up." Gold said. "Don't have very good memories of that room. But that's no matter. It's yours now – you enjoy it."

* * *

_Twenty one and a half years ago . . . . . . _

_Gold entered the house, which was very quiet. He knew that Milah was home, her car was in the garage. He had arrived home a bit earlier than expected so that he could surprise Bae when he came home from school. He set his bag down in the hallway when he heard some muffled noises coming from the living room. Gold limped toward the sound. When he entered the room, he found it to be empty, but the door to the library was cracked open. Gold peeked inside and heard the conversation quite clearly. _

"_You should probably go. He'll be home soon." Milah said._

"_We never did find that book I was looking for." Jones replied. _

"_Oh, you're right, that's what we came in here for." Milah said, laughing. "Oh, Killian – why can't we just run away?"_

"_Because your gimp husband will find us with all of his connections." Jones said. "He wouldn't look for us if you left the boy behind." _

"_Do you really think I'd give Ian the satisfaction of having my son?" Milah asked._

"_You've said many times that the boy does nothing but hold you back. Leave him, Milah. I just bought my boat, we can see the world together." Jones said. _

"_That would mean Ian would get what he wants – me gone, and his son. He doesn't deserve anything he wants." Milah said. "He'll have that boy over my dead body."_

"_You could take him on in court." Jones said. "His bum leg – you said he did it to himself."_

"_I just suspect that he did, I have no proof." Milah said. "But when I mentioned it to him – he seemed nervous, so – I suspect I'm right. That damn Potts woman likely covered it up, she's always covering for him. She treats him more like her child than her partner, always coddling him. Just my luck to marry a man with no living parents and still end up having to endure the mother-in-law from hell." _

"_Well maybe we can come up with a plan to – be rid of both of them. Permanently." Jones said._

_Gold had heard enough. Part of him wanted to simply burst into the library and strangle the both of them. But he turned and walked away. He would deal with them later. _

* * *

Later that evening, Belle helped Mrs. Potts in the kitchen after dinner. "You really don't need to do this dear, I can handle it just fine." Mrs. Potts said.

"I know – I just want to – be useful. You and Ian worked all day and – well, I'm not used to doing nothing with my time." Belle said.

"You're doing something. You're here for Ian, and for the first time in over twenty years he's going back to being the man that he used to be." Mrs. Potts said.

"You know, the first morning I was here, I went to sit down with him for breakfast and he told me that he didn't like company, and that you never sat with him and ate." Belle said.

"Oh, he was just saying that to keep you at arm's length. It takes him quite a bit to trust someone. Even with a background check." Mrs. Potts said.

"Background check?" Belle asked. "Do you think he did one on me?" Belle asked.

"Oh, I'd be certain of it, I doubt he'd have let you into the house without one." Mrs. Potts said. Belle looked offended. "Oh, don't be upset, dear – it's just something he does, and I'll admit, I've done it many times myself. When you work in the field we do it's very easy to become a bit – paranoid at times."

"Well how much does he know about me, then?" Belle asked.

"You'd have to ask him that." Mrs. Potts said.

Later that evening, Belle entered Gold's room dressed in her usual pajama bottoms and t-shirt that she wore to bed. Gold was sitting up in bed reading a magazine. Belle climbed into bed without saying a word to him. "You've been very quiet since dinner. Something wrong?" Gold asked.

"How much did you know about me? Before I came here?" Belle asked. Gold put his magazine aside.

"I knew that you and Gwen weren't discussing anything good." Gold said.

"You did a background check on me, didn't you?" Belle asked.

"No." Gold replied.

"No?" Belle asked.

"I did five." Gold said. Belle looked at him angrily, then she pulled the covers over her shoulder and turned her back to him. "I was going to do a couple more but you were so – utterly dull on paper that I figured what was the point." Belle turned and looked at him.

"Dull? I thought you said I fascinate you." Belle said.

"Oh, you do dear – just not on paper." Gold said. "What's that saying? Don't judge a book by its cover. You are – a perfect example of that."

"So all the things I've shared with you, all of my stories – you already knew them." Belle said.

"Some of them. Didn't know the bicycle one. But it was nice to hear you tell them. Sweetheart, I'm sorry – you just have to be careful in my line of work, why do you think I was so upset about your little friendship with that Ruby girl?" Gold said.

"You still think Ruby has some hidden sinister agenda?" Belle asked. Gold sighed.

"Probably not. I actually got on with her grandmother very well at one time and – she and Bae would play together sometimes when they were kids. But it's just best to err on the side of caution. Look, after all of this ends, we can look into Ruby's background and if it's clean – aside from whatever she does in those short skirts – you can re-visit your friendship with her." Gold said.

"Is this how it'll be for us? Always? Anytime we meet someone, you're going to hop onto the computer and probe their entire life story?" Belle asked.

"I'd like to say that no, that won't be the case. But it likely will." Gold admitted. "Belle, I have very good reason for this. Look at what happened with Hopper, and no one would have suspected him. And that wasn't the first incident like that in my life. You always have to be careful who you trust."

* * *

_Twenty one and a half years ago . . . . . . . . _

_Gold had spent a couple of extra hours at his office, researching the background of one Killian Jones. To say he wasn't impressed with the man was an understatement. He had a shady background from start to finish. Born in Ireland, arrested there multiple times on petty thievery, somehow finagled a work visa with an international boating company, and currently had a green card that permitted him to work in the states, which puzzled him because with his record it had to mean that he had some underhanded connections in order to acquire this status. On paper he looked shady at best. In person – he knew the man was even worse. Gold arrived at his apartment in Virginia armed with enough information to present to Milah when he and Bae got back home that assured him that any attempts she made against him would be futile. Regina Mills had gladly agreed to watch Bae for a couple of extra hours that day; they seemed to be getting on quite well. Bae had been with him for three days and they were having a wonderful time, despite the shadow of Killian Jones cavorting with his wife looming over him._

_Gold opened the door to find Bae and Regina sitting in front of the television console playing a video game – with a young man. Bae jumped up and ran up to Gold._

"_Papa!" Bae shouted. "I won again!" Regina and the young man with her stood up._

"_Did you now?" Gold asked, looking the man up and down and glaring at Regina. "Bae – can you go to your room for a minute please?" _

"_Okay. Bye Regina, by Daniel!" Bae said, and he left the room. _

"_Who is this?" Gold asked Regina bluntly._

"_This is my boyfriend, Daniel. We were going out tonight so I told him to just come by after he got off work." Regina said._

"_Daniel what?" Gold asked._

"_Daniel Stallman, sir. Nice to meet you. Thanks for helping Regina out, it means a lot to her." Daniel said, offering his hand to Gold. Gold refused to shake it. _

"_I'd like to speak with Miss Mills in private, if you don't mind." Gold said. Regina glared at Gold angrily._

"_It's okay. I'll be waiting in the car." Daniel said. He gave Regina a kiss on the cheek and left. _

"_When I requested that you watch my son, I presumed that you understood that it was YOU who would be watching my son. I gave no permission for you to have a guest over." Gold said._

"_It was just my boyfriend. We weren't doing anything, just playing video games with Bae." Regina said._

"_How much do you know about him?" Gold asked._

"_Bae?" Regina asked. Gold glared at her._

"_Your boyfriend. You've been dating him for how long?" Gold asked._

"_Three months." Regina said. _

"_Have you done a background check on him?" Gold asked._

"_Why would I do that?" Regina asked._

"_Because you're interning at the CIA with the possibility of gaining employment there, and you can't trust anyone." Gold said. _

"_He's my boyfriend." Regina said._

"_And? Where was he born? What is the background of his parents, where did he grow up, how many times did he move in his lifetime, how many jobs has he had, how long was he employed with each of them, how much money does he have in his bank account, does he have any questionable personal associations, and what is his specific interest in you?" Gold asked. _

"_You're paranoid." Regina said._

"_I'm realistic." Gold said. "You think I didn't do a full check on you before I let you sit for my son?" _

"_You did not." Regina said._

"_You grew up in suburban Boston, your parents own their own business which bears your father's name but your mother pretty much runs it because she's a controlling bitch and you couldn't move out fast enough to get away from her. You've been a straight A student your whole life and have never failed at anything you've tried, academic or otherwise – until you met me." Gold said. "Would you like me to spout off your financial net worth?"_

"_How would you get that?" Regina asked._

"_Well, the agency has your social on record, it wasn't that difficult. Now – if you think that you're going to pursue a serious relationship with this young man – I recommend a background check. All you have to do is get his social security number and get it to me, and I'll do the rest. I can get some things without it but, better details with it. And in the future, I suggest you do this much sooner than three months into dating. Second date would be my recommendation." Gold said._

"_Well, there won't be a future in that regard – Daniel's the one for me. He's my true love." Regina said._

"_There's no such thing, dearie." Gold said._

"_Just because your love life sucks doesn't mean other people can't be happy." Regina retorted. _

"_You know nothing of my life, love or otherwise." Gold said._

"_Right. You're married, aren't you? And yet you spend half of your time away from your wife. Why isn't she ever here? Why isn't she here when your SON is here? And how come there are no pictures of her anywhere? You have tons of pictures out of Bae but none of his mother. Why is that?" Regina asked._

"_We're done for the evening, dearie." Gold said. "Get his social – better to be safe than sorry."_

"_I know all I need to know about Daniel. And he's waiting for me. Goodbye, Mr. Gold." Regina said, and she left. Gold shook his head in disgust after Regina left. He went into Bae's room. Bae was sitting on his bed playing with several of his Star Wars figurines, where were laid out in an orderly fashion._

"_Put your toys away Bae – we're going out for dinner." Gold said. _

"_Okay, papa." Bae said. Gold stepped out of the room. He hesitated for a moment, then went into the living room, sat down on the sofa, and picked up the phone. _

"_Yes, it's Gold. I need a favor. Find out all you can about anyone currently in the age range of twenty to thirty who bears the name Daniel Stallman." Gold said into the phone. _


	18. Chapter 18

_I hope everyone had a wonderful holiday! Thank you as always to all of my readers and a special thank you those who leave feedback, I can't tell you how much I appreciate it. Next chapter will have more flashbacks, and most if not all of the details you've been waiting for regarding Gold's past should be completely revealed within the next three chapters. :) More hints in this chapter - happy hunting for them! _

_I do not own 'Once Upon a Time.'_

**_Chapter 18_**

_Twenty one and a half years ago . . . . . . _

_The man at the door handed Gold two packages. Gold thanked the man and went back into his office. He sat down behind his desk and opened the first package; it was a video tape. Gold stared at it for a lengthy amount of time, then put the cassette into the video player in his office, turned on the television monitor, and sat back. It was a surveillance tape of the house back in Storybrooke, and Gold discovered that it contained endless footage of Milah and Killian Jones cavorting in the house while he was away with Bae – in his own bed, on his office desk (which he would certainly have replaced, if not burned), and of course, in the library, their seemingly favorite room in which to engage in all sorts of debauched behavior. It was all the evidence Gold needed. As he plotted his next move, he wasn't sure who was more stupid – himself for thinking that Milah ever loved him, or Milah for not figuring out that he would probably bug the place while he was away. Milah was never the brightest bulb on the tree, but she wasn't a fool. He presumed that she was so caught up in her dalliance with Jones that she lost all semblance of common sense. Gold clicked off the video after he'd seen enough and glanced at the other envelope. He picked it up and opened it; a sad look came over his face as he read the papers inside. He was hoping he wasn't right on this one. He set the papers down when a knock came on his door. _

"_Hi. Did you read my analysis?" Regina asked as she peeked her head into the door. _

"_I did." Gold replied. Regina entered the office._

"_And?" she asked._

"_And what?" Gold asked._

"_What did you think?" Regina asked. Gold reached into his desk drawer, took out a piece of paper, and handed it to Regina. She looked it over. "This isn't possible. I spent hours working on this!"_

"_And you missed some of the most obvious clues, Miss Mills. Honestly, this one was so simple my son could have figured it out. If you read my notes you'll see that you missed things that were right in front of your face. If you can't discover those things in a written scenario – how on earth can you expect to find them in a real life situation? You're too trusting; that's your problem."_

"_As opposed to you, who doesn't trust anyone. I don't want to end up like you." Regina said._

"_Well, then perhaps working for the CIA isn't the field for you. Oh, and by the way – just to prove my point." Gold said. He handed her the papers that he had just read from the envelope that was delivered to him. Regina glanced at the papers then looked up at him angrily._

"_This is a lie." Regina said._

"_Oh, I don't think so, dearie." Gold said. "And that's without even having his social. Imagine what else I could find." _

"_No. No, this is wrong. You're wrong. There's a logical explanation for this and I'm going to find out what it is." Regina said._

"_The logical explanation is that your boyfriend has been lying to you. The question that remains is – why." Gold said. _

"_You had no right. I didn't ask you to do this, you had no right." Regina said._

"_I'm with the CIA, dearie. That alone gives me the right." Gold said. "Would you have rather not known?" Regina doesn't respond. "Who exactly did he TELL you he was working for?"_

"_He said he's a courier for a local company, he didn't give a name. Maybe he doesn't know." Regina said. Gold chuckled a bit._

"_Really, dearie? You knew who they were as soon as you saw the name and you don't work for them. So unless your boyfriend is the stupidest man on the planet, trust me – he knows." Gold said. "And if I may say so – the fact that you've been dating him for three months and knew nothing about his place of employment doesn't exactly put you in the best light. So now that you've been enlightened to the real world – perhaps on your next assignment you'll take a more cautious approach." _

"_I still say he's innocent." Regina said. "Maybe he's being blackmailed or something." _

"_Miss Mills, it is my experience that there are no truly innocent people in this world, apart from children, and even some of them are a bit shady. If I were to ever find one I'd consider it a miracle, and I don't even believe in that sort of thing. You do what you like with this information. My recommendation is that you use it to your advantage, but – well, that's your choice. Now if you'll excuse me, I have plans with my son." Gold told her._

"_Who's watching him?" Regina asked._

"_My partner came into town, she's spending the morning with him, and I promise you she won't have some shady boyfriend sitting in my apartment when I get there." Gold said._

"_Your partner is Gwendolyn Potts, isn't she? I've read about her, she's a legend." Regina said._

"_That she is. Taught me everything I know." Gold said. _

"_You really think Daniel is in with this – organization?" Regina asked._

"_Well it doesn't matter what I think. What matters is what you think – or more importantly – what you're going to do about it." Regina held the papers that Gold gave her in her hand and slunk out the door sadly. _

* * *

Belle awoke and sighed as she felt Gold's long and gentle fingers running through her hair. She looked up at him and smiled sleepily. "Good morning, sweetheart. Happy birthday." Gold whispered.

"Thank you." Belle said, sitting up. Gold gave her a quick kiss on the cheek.

"Gwen made your favorite breakfast. She's on her way up with it now." Gold said.

"You're very sweet. You didn't have to do that." Belle said.

"I had to do something for your birthday. What kind of a boyfriend would I be if I didn't?" Gold asked.

"Are we officially that? Boyfriend and girlfriend?" Belle asked.

"I suppose we are." Gold said. "I mean – if that's what you want." Belle smiled at him.

"That's what I want." she replied, and Belle pulled him into a kiss just as Mrs. Potts entered the room.

"Oh, I'm sorry, I'll – I'll just set this down and pretend I didn't see a thing." Mrs. Potts said.

"It's alright, Gwen." Belle said. "Thank you."

"You're very welcome, dear." Mrs. Potts said as she set the tray down on the bed, and she looked at Gold. "I'll get everything ready then." Mrs. Potts left the room.

"Get everything ready for what?" Belle asked as Gold moved the tray of food in front of her.

"I have another surprise for you." Gold said. "Eat your breakfast and – well, it should be ready after."

"Not even a hint?" Belle asked.

"Eat. You'll get your surprise soon enough." Gold said. Belle complied and finished her breakfast, then got out of bed, showered, and dressed for the day. She was instructed by Gold to meet him in the study when she was finished. Belle stepped into the study, where Gold was waiting for her. "Come with me." Gold said, and he took her hand and led her into his hidden room.

"What's going on, Ian?" Belle asked. Gold led her to a large computer screen, and motioned for her to sit down.

"This." Gold said, and he turned on the computer. Belle sat back and watched, and gasped when her father's image appeared on the screen and began to speak.

"Belle. I'm told that you'll see this on your birthday. I just want you to know that – well, that I'm alright. And I miss you so much, my dear sweet girl. I know that you can't be here right now, but – I'm assured that you're safe. I'm also assured that – well, that you'll be home as soon as you can be. I hope you're not frightened Belle, wherever you are, but – well, knowing you I'm sure that you're being a very brave girl. I'm sure you're facing whatever you must face with grace and dignity as you always do. Happy birthday, my beautiful angel. I love you."

The screen went black and Moe French's face disappeared. Belle burst into tears when the message ended, and quickly began to sob.

"Papa." she whispered quietly. Gold stared at her, bewildered and unsure of how to react. He then moved behind her and put his hand on her shoulder.

"Belle, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to upset you, I thought you'd like it." Gold said. Belle stood up, turned to face Gold, and wrapped her arms around him tightly.

"I love you." she whispered. "Thank you. Thank you for letting me see my papa again." Belle kissed him on the cheek.

"Well, you'll see him soon for real, I promise." Gold said.

"I can't wait for him to meet you." Belle said as she stepped back and faced him, holding his left hand.

"Yes, I'm sure he'll be wildly impressed because don't all fathers imagine that their daughter will grow up to fall in love with a lame, reclusive old man?" Gold quipped sarcastically.

"You're not old." Belle said, giving him a kiss on the cheek. "And you promised me that we'd work on the reclusive thing, right? You had a life before, Ian. You can have one again."

"I'll try, Belle." Gold whispered.

"Do you want to start trying?" Belle asked.

"Of course I do." Gold replied.

"Then come with me." Belle said. "Downstairs."

"Belle, what are you doing?" Gold asked suspiciously.

"I've had an idea for a couple of weeks. Just follow me, come on." Belle said, and she grabbed his hand and pulled him out of the room.

When they reached the foyer of the house, Belle stopped at the hall closet door. "Belle, what are you up to?" Gold asked.

"You said you wanted to try, right?" Belle asked.

"Try what?" Gold asked.

"Living." Belle replied, and she opened the closet door. She took a long coat off of a hanger – it was a man's coat, and it appeared to be just the right size for Gold.

"Where did you get that?" Gold asked. Belle smiled sheepishly.

"I knew you didn't have a warm jacket because you never leave and so I asked Mrs. Potts to get one for you. For when you were ready." Belle said.

"Ready for what?" Gold asked.

"To start living again. Here, put it on." Belle said.

"Belle – we can't go anywhere." Gold said.

"I know that. Just put it on. It's my birthday, don't you want to make me happy?" Belle asked. Gold sighed.

"Alright." he complied. Belle helped him put the jacket on, then stood in front of him and straightened his collar.

"My goodness, you look smart. So handsome." Belle said, and she kissed him on the cheek after she finished buttoning the jacket. Belle then reached into the closet, grabbed her own coat from off of a hanger, and put it on. "Let's go then." Belle said, taking his hand.

"Belle – I already told you – we can't go anywhere." Gold said.

"Well, we can't leave the property, but – we can go for a walk. Outside." Belle said.

"Sweetheart." Gold said, a pained look coming over his face. He looked as if he were about to cry. Belle reached out and touched his cheek.

"Ian – it's a gated property. And I know you have the entire place under surveillance. Nothing will happen. You have to start somewhere, love. Just a little walk on the grounds, we won't go far. You can do this. Think of it as a little baby step toward your goal. And I'll be right there with you. Let's just go out for a bit. If you get uncomfortable we'll stop and we'll come back in, alright?" Belle said. "There's no need to be afraid, Ian. I'm right here."

Gold had thought himself a coward for the longest time; he wasn't even sure that he remember what it was to be brave. But looking at Belle – all she had given up in her own life, through her own bravery – he wanted to remember what being brave was – if only for her. "Alright." Gold whispered quietly. He grabbed Belle's right hand with his left and gripped it tightly, as if his life depended on his ability to hold onto her. Belle opened the door and they stepped outside. In twenty years, Gold hadn't stepped outside the door any further than opening it to retrieve whatever had been delivered. And within seconds, he cautiously stepped outside with Belle and walked several steps until they were standing in the driveway. Gold's heart began to race and he began to shake.

"It's okay. You're doing fine." Belle said, and she moved in closer to Gold, putting her arm around him. They took a few more steps, and then stopped. Gold was still trembling, and Belle looked up at him and saw that he looked quite pale. "Come on – I think this is enough for today, let's go back in." Gold nodded but didn't say a word. Belle led him back to the front door; they had barely gone a few hundred feet from the door. Gold breathed a sigh of relief when they entered the house and the front door closed. Mrs. Potts stood there waiting for them.

"Let me take your coat dear, I'm so proud of you." Mrs. Potts said to Gold as she helped him take his coat off.

"You did it. You went outside." Belle said happily as she touched his cheek. Gold didn't say a word to her. "Why don't you go into the living room, Mrs. Potts will get a fire started. I'll go make us some nice, warm hot chocolate." Gold nodded in agreement. Belle took off her jacket and flitted out of the room. Mrs. Potts led Gold into the living room and Gold sat down on the sofa. Mrs. Potts went over to the fireplace and started up a small fire, then sat down next to Gold.

"Are you alright, dear?" Mrs. Potts asked as she put her hand on his leg. Gold looked up at her.

"I don't know if I can do this, Gwen." Gold said. "We barely went a few hundred feet and I panicked."

"It's been twenty years, Ian. It'll take time. That was Belle's idea – small steps. I didn't tell her that I tried the same with you, many times, and you would never comply because I figured she had a better chance of convincing you – and I was right." Mrs. Potts said.

"Every step I take away from this house, Gwen – is a step toward me facing what I did. Really facing it." Gold said. "And I don't know if I can do that. I don't know if I want to do that." Gold's voice began to tremble.

"Ian – you have a choice. You either have to leave Bae behind – or leave Belle behind. Bae isn't coming back, Ian. But Belle is here. And it's very clear to me that the only way that girl is leaving is if you demand it to be so. But you can't have them both. That's what you have to accept." Mrs. Potts said, and she stood up just as Belle entered the room carrying two steaming hot mugs.

"Gwen, would you like to join us, I can make another cup." Belle said.

"Oh, no thank you, dear – I have some errands to run, I'll be gone the rest of the afternoon. You two enjoy your time together. I'll see you later." Mrs. Potts said, and she left. Belle sat down next to Gold and handed him a cup. They both took a sip and then set their cups down on the coffee table.

"I thought you did well." Belle said, taking his hand. "Are you alright?" Gold turned and looked at her.

"I don't want you to leave me, Belle." Gold said, and he reached out and touched her cheek.

"Who said anything about leaving, I'm not going anywhere." Belle said.

"There are things you don't know about me yet, Belle. And when you find out – you may not want to be with me." Gold said.

"You know you can tell me anything, Ian." Belle said. Gold picked up his hot chocolate and took another sip. "I've, um – I found some books in the library that have information on agoraphobia. I know they're somewhat dated but – well, what I gather from them is that you're not really afraid of going outside of the house – you're afraid of what will _happen _when you leave. I want to help you, Ian – but you have to open up to me and tell me what it is. What are you so afraid of?" Gold sighed.

"I've done things, Belle. Terrible things. Unforgiveable things." Gold said.

"It was part of your job, I understand that." Belle said.

"No. Hopper – what you saw. That wasn't part of my job. That was me – losing control. And it's not the first time." Gold said. "And I'm not even sure it'll be the last."

"But you stopped." Belle said. She reached up and touched his face. "Because I asked you to." Gold's eyes welled up with tears.

"That's because you make me want to be a better man, Belle." he told her. "I'm sorry that I – well that we didn't get very far on our walk."

"It's okay. You were out of the house. We'll keep trying, that's all I want. We'll walk a bit further next time. And then further the time after that. And then when all of this is over – maybe by then we'll have made it to the main gate, and we can go into town." Belle said. "We can show those people that you're not some monster – you're just an ordinary man."

"I don't know if I know how to be that anymore. An ordinary man." Gold said. Belle moved her lips to his and kissed him.

"Yes you do." Belle whispered, smiling at him. She wrapped her arms around him and kissed him again, this time causing him to fall backward on the sofa, pulling her down on top of him. Belle began to remove his tie as they kissed for several minutes, until Gold pushed her away.

"Belle, we can't do this." he said.

"You're right. The condoms are upstairs, I'll go get them." Belle said.

"No, Belle – that's not what I meant." Gold said, grabbing her arm as she started to stand up.

"Ian – you said you wanted to wait because I was leaving. I'm not leaving now, I'm staying." Belle said.

"Belle – I need to – you need to know everything about me before we take that step. And I need to – I need to know that I can be – well, that I can be an ordinary man again. It's just not fair to either of us otherwise." Gold said. "I'm sorry sweetheart – I don't want to ruin your birthday, I just – I need more time."

"Okay." Belle said. "And I'm sorry too, I don't mean to push you, I would never do that. And you didn't ruin my birthday, it's been a lovely day so far. How about this? We can just stay here and cuddle and drink our hot chocolate."

"That would be nice, we can do that." Gold replied. Belle laid down and snuggled up next to him. Gold began to run his fingers through her hair. "For the longest time – I never believed that anyone like you existed, and if they did, they certainly wouldn't cross my path. And yet here you are. You are truly my miracle - my beautiful Belle." Gold said, and Belle sighed and smiled happily.

* * *

_Twenty one and a half years ago . . . . . . _

_Bae bounded into Gold's apartment as Gold limped behind him and closed the door. Bae was carrying a toy airplane that Gold bought for him at the Air and Space Museum, and he mimicked a plane flying, complete with noises, as he ran through the apartment. "Bae – that's enough, you need to settle down, it's getting late." Gold said. Bae set the toy down as Gold sat down in the living room, and climbed onto the sofa with Gold. _

"_Can we go there again, papa?" Bae asked._

"_Bae, that was our second trip there, how many times do you want to visit?" Gold asked._

"_I wanna go every day!" Bae said excitedly. _

"_Come here." Gold said, and he put his arm around Bae. "How would you feel about living here?"_

"_You mean forever?" Bae asked._

"_Well – forever's a long time, but – for a while. I have a chance to work here, full-time, starting in the fall. It'd be a new school year for you, and you could go to a school here, they have lots of good schools." Gold said._

"_But I go to school in Storybrooke." Bae said. "My friends are there. And Granny's Diner is there. Nobody makes a hamburger better than Granny."_

"_Well – there are places that have hamburgers here. And we could still visit Storybrooke. And you can still talk to your friends on the phone." Gold said. _

"_Is mama coming to live here with us?" Bae asked. Gold sighed._

"_No. Your mama won't be living here. It'll just be you and me." Gold said. "And Mrs. Potts of course will be here from time to time." _

"_Mama doesn't want to be with us anymore, does she? She wants to be with Mr. Jones." Bae said. _

"_Bae – your mum loves you, I don't ever want you to think that to not be true. She's just – different than we are. You'll see her. You'll visit, as much as you like." Gold said. "It's your choice, son. You're a big boy now, you're old enough to know what you want. If you want to stay with your mum and visit me – that'd be fine." _

"_I want to stay with you, papa. I don't want to live with mama and Mr. Jones, I want to stay with you." Bae said, and he hugged Gold tightly. _

"_It's alright, Bae. You'll be with me then. I'll never leave you, I promise." Gold said._

_The next morning, Gold awoke to the sound of the phone ringing. He grumbled as he reached to answer it. "Gold." he mumbled sleepily._

"_How dare you!" the voice on the other end screeched at him. _

"_Well, hello Milah. I take it you received at least one of my – gifts." Gold said. "Which one would that be?"_

"_You have the nerve to serve me with divorce papers while you're gone, and have the gall to demand full-time physical custody of our son?" Milah asked angrily. "You'll have that boy over my dead body."_

"_Don't tempt me, Milah." Gold said. "And there is no court in the world that will consider you a fit mother when they see what I have to show them. You do understand what I do for a living, right? I mean, you should, it was mostly your doing that pushed me into this field in the first place. Anyhow – it's amazing how advanced surveillance equipment is nowadays. And so tiny – you can hide it anywhere. Records audio, too. You and Jones have been having quite a time of it while Bae and I have been gone, haven't you? I wonder what a family judge will think of it. That's my second surprise, it should be arriving soon so that you can get a preview. Just a small snippet – wouldn't want to give everything away. That's your department." _

"_You bastard." Milah said._

"_We have court date set for Tuesday. Bae and I will be extending our vacation until then, I'll see to it that he catches up on what he misses in school." Gold said. _

"_So you're really leaving me?" Milah asked._

"_You left me ages ago, Milah. I'm just finishing what you started. I'll see you in court." Gold said, and he hung up the phone. _

* * *

Gold and Belle lay asleep on the sofa, their arms wrapped around one another, having both dozed off into a lazy afternoon nap. Belle was startled awake by a muffled ringing coming from her pants pocket. She pulled away from Gold, who grumbled as he turned onto his side, sat up, and reached into her pocket to pull out the phone that Emma had given her. Gold awakened as the ringing became louder, and he immediately grabbed the phone from Belle. "Who is this? Hello?" Gold said, answering the phone. There was no answer on the other end. Gold slammed the phone shut and sat up.

"I thought no one was supposed to be able to call that number." Belle said.

"They're not." Gold replied. He angrily flung the phone toward the fireplace, where it landed on the still burning but diminishing flames. Gold stood up and reached for his cane.

"Ian, what's happening?" Belle asked nervously.

"I don't want you to worry about anything, alright?" Gold said as Belle stood up. He kissed her softly on the lips. "Go get a couple of books from the library and come upstairs to the study. I need to do some work and I want you as close to me as you can be."

"You said I was safe here." Belle said.

"You are." Gold replied. "I just need to take care of some things, alright? Everything will be fine." Gold pulled Belle into a hug and looked off behind her with a look of anger on his face.

* * *

"That should have him running scared." Regina said, a smug look on her face, as she turned to look behind her at the other person in the room. "I guess he found his miracle after all. Too bad it won't last." Regina said, and she laughed a bit to herself.


	19. Chapter 19

_Sorry for the delay in getting this up! Next two chapters will pretty much complete Gold's entire backstory - might use more of a narrative approach rather than flashbacks, haven't decided yet. That is what was slowing me down with this chapter, which is why I took the narrative approach at the end. Flashbacks were taking too long. _

_Anyhow . . . please see the end of this chapter for some important a/n's. Thank you as always for your feedback and support!_

**_Chapter 19_**

_Twenty one and a half years ago . . . . . _

"_So what did your boyfriend have to say for himself?" Gold asked when Regina entered his office. _

"_He said – he said he's trying to get out. He said he didn't know at first, and once he figured it out, he was stuck. I told him I'd help him." Regina said._

"_Did you now?" Gold asked. "And how do you propose to do that?" _

"_He said he'll talk. If you offer him protection." Regina said. Gold stared at her for a moment. _

"_And how do you know that anything he tells us will be the truth?" Gold asked._

"_Because I trust him. And because I love him." Regina said. Gold chuckled a bit._

"_Ah yes – love. It makes even the smartest people do foolish things." Gold said._

"_Who are we talking about here? Me or you?" Regina asked. _

"_Why on earth would we be talking about me, dearie?" Gold asked._

"_Because you took off your wedding ring about four days ago, and you were supposed to leave yesterday with your son and yet – you're still here. And so is he." Regina said. "You think I'm stupid, and sloppy, and you probably think I'd be the worst agent ever. But I'm smart, and I notice things – things that matter. And I think you underestimate me." _

"_Never said that I did." Gold said, becoming a bit frustrated. "I just think you can do better. If I didn't think you had potential, I wouldn't even be bothering with you, I'd have simply dismissed you altogether from the start." _

"_And if I didn't trust Daniel – if I thought for one minute that he were lying to me – I would walk away and never look back." Regina said. "Will you at least give him a chance?" Gold thought about it for a moment._

"_Tell you what, dearie. I have to leave shortly because I have some personal business to attend to in Maine. I'll be back in two weeks. That should give him enough time to gather plenty of evidence against his employer. Meet me with him in my office two weeks from today, at ten a.m. sharp. And if what he has interests me – then we'll talk about a deal." Gold said._

"_And if it doesn't?" Regina asked._

"_Then let's hope your little boyfriend looks good in the color orange. Because he'll be going to prison." Gold said._

* * *

Belle awakened and sat up – she had fallen asleep on the sofa in Gold's study, the book she was reading lying on her lap. Belle got up and walked toward Gold's bedroom. She peeked inside – it was empty; the bed hadn't even been slept in. "Ian?" Belle called out, but there was no response. Belle went back out into the hallway and headed toward the west wing of the house. The door to Bae's room was wide open; Belle made her way there and let out a loud scream as soon as she entered the doorway. Gold lay on the ground, unmoving, and Regina Mills - the woman that she had seen murder a man several months prior, was standing over his lifeless body and staring at her smugly . . . .

"Belle! Belle, wake up sweetheart!" Gold shouted as he sat next to Belle on the sofa in his study. Belle gasped as she was startled awake.

"Ian?" she whispered, trembling and trying to catch her breath.

"It was just a nightmare, love." Gold said. He reached for the blanket that had been covering Belle and wrapped it around her shoulders. "It's alright. It's alright." Gold wrapped his arms around her tightly. Belle quietly melted into him, trying to get as close to him as physically possible.

"What's going on?" Mrs. Potts asked as she entered the room, flipping on the light as she did.

"She had a nightmare. She's fine." Gold said, still holding Belle tightly.

"Regina. She was here. She was standing over you – I thought she had killed you." Belle said, pulling away from Gold a bit.

"Sweetheart, it was a bad dream, I'm right here." Gold said. Belle snuggled back into him, resting her head on his shoulder.

"What time is it?" Belle asked.

"About three thirty in the morning." Gold said, and he gave her a gentle kiss on the forehead. "Gwen and I were working pretty late, I only got to bed about an hour ago. You had fallen asleep out here and I didn't want to wake you."

"Why don't we all head back to bed then? You sleep in as late as you need to dear, I won't disturb you." Mrs. Potts said.

"Actually I set my alarm for nine, I don't want to go too late – we're too close, if we don't move on her soon we could lose her." Gold said.

"Well I'll see you in the morning then." Mrs. Potts said, and she left the room.

"Come on, sweetheart – let's go to bed." Gold said. He put his arm around Belle and led her out of the study and into his bedroom. They climbed into bed together and Belle immediately snuggled back into Gold's arms.

"Lose who?" Belle asked.

"Sweetheart, go back to sleep, there's nothing for you to worry about." Gold said, giving Belle a quick kiss and running his hand up and down her back. "All of this is going to be over soon."

"You found Regina Mills, didn't you?" Belle asked. Gold sighed.

"Yes." Gold said. "She's been on the run for the past year; closest we ever got to her was through Agent Humbert and – well, you saw what happened there. She's very smart and she's always two steps ahead of us. Mrs. Potts got some information while she was in England and it's helped us track her down."

"So why can't you just – you know – go get her?" Belle asked.

"There's a complication." Gold said. "I really shouldn't be telling you all of this, the less you know right now the better. And I have to get up tomorrow to make sure this goes smoothly so I really need to get some sleep."

"I'm sorry." Belle said. "I just – the dream I had, it was so real and -"

"Belle, it was just a dream, alright? I promise – we're very close. Once we have Regina, we can start the trial proceedings. With any luck, she'll reveal who she's working for in order to get a lesser sentence. Then you can testify and you won't have to hide any longer." Gold said.

"Nor will you." Belle replied. "I'm sorry to keep you awake. Goodnight, Ian." Belle whispered, and she sighed and closed her eyes. Gold thought about her words to him – she was right. Once this was over, he would have to choose – either walk away from the past that had haunted him for the past two decades – or walk away from Belle.

* * *

_Twenty one and a half years ago . . . . . _

_Milah stormed out of the courtroom, glaring at Gold the entire time. After she was gone, Mrs. Potts entered the courtroom with Bae, and Bae went running to Gold. _

"_Where's mama?" Bae asked. _

"_She left." Gold replied._

"_But she didn't say goodbye." Bae replied sadly. _

"_I know." Gold said. "Listen – we're going to stay at the Storybrooke Hotel for a few days, and then we're going back to Virginia. Mrs. Potts is going to go to the house tomorrow and get some of your things, so tonight we'll make a list of what you want to take with you, and what you want to leave here."_

"_We won't live with mama anymore?" Bae asked._

"_No." Gold replied. "I'm sorry, Bae. I know I said you could finish out the school year here, but – well, I think it would be best if I have a tutor for you in Virginia to finish the remainder of the school year, and then you'll start at a new school in the fall." _

"_Doesn't mama love us anymore?" Bae asked. Gold sighed. _

"_Your mother still loves you, very much. You'll go see her before we leave to say goodbye – and you'll visit with her over the summer, we just have to figure out all of the details." Gold said. _

"_What are details?" Bae asked. _

"_Nothing you need to worry about. How about we go to Granny's for a burger, would you like that?" Gold asked. _

"_Okay." Bae said, not appearing all that excited. _

_**Several days later . . . . . **_

_Milah greeted Bae and Gold at the door. Bae ran up to Milah and hugged her, and she smiled half-heartedly. "Bae – go up to your room and get the rest of your things." Gold said. "Then you can say goodbye to your mum." Bae slowly made his way upstairs. Milah glared at Gold._

"_You're quite proud of yourself, aren't you?" Milah asked._

"_Proud that I'm tearing my son's life apart? No Milah – I'm not proud of that at all. But I'm not going to stand by and let you hurt the lad any longer. You barely spend time with him because you're too busy carrying on with that Irish prat, and when you do find a moment for him all you do is hound him over his grades when you know damn well that he truly does the best he can, he's not a top student but he's not failing, either, he's never brought home a failing grade in his life. And the one thing he's good at, his drawing – which, by the way, is a talent he gets from you, you'd think you would support that – you put him down at every turn." _

"_That's not a career, that's a hobby, even I knew that, do you think I was serious about that when I went to Europe to study?" Milah asked._

"_Milah, he's a child, I hardly think he's planning his career path at this point in his life. And of course you were never serious about your artistic career, the only thing you were serious about was getting a free trip to Europe courtesy of your indulgent father. Unfortunately you didn't expect to come back with a husband and baby in tow. So think of it this way – you can now go back to doing whatever it was you were doing before Bae and I so rudely disrupted your life." Gold said. _

"_You really think I don't love my son?" Milah asked._

"_I don't doubt that you love him, Milah. But I do think you resent him. Maybe when he's older you'll find more in common with him. But for now – he's better off with me, and obviously the court agrees." Gold said. "You can call him any time you like – my attorney will be in touch with yours to work out the visitation." Bae came running down the stairs carrying a backpack. "You ready to go, son?" Gold asked. Bae walked over to Milah. _

"_Bye, mama." Bae said, and he hugged her once again. Milah knelt down in front of him._

"_Goodbye, Bailey. I love you, you know that, right?" Milah asked. Bae nodded. _

"_I'll miss you." Bae said. _

"_I'll miss you, too." Milah told him. "You behave for your papa." _

"_Come on, Bae." Gold said. Bae took Gold's left hand and they left. Milah's eyes began to well up with tears. Killian Jones, who had been hiding in the kitchen, came out into the foyer. _

"_It'll be alright, Milah. We'll get him back." Jones said. "It may take some time, but – I'll figure something out." _

* * *

Belle stayed in the study again the next day as Gold, Mrs. Potts, and Emma worked diligently in the hidden room. She wished there was something she could do to help, she hated feeling useless, but Gold assured her that the best thing for her to do was to just be patient and wait. About halfway through the day, Belle could hear Emma shouting loudly at Gold. Moments after she began shouting, the hidden door opened and Emma stormed out into the study. "Emma, stop!" Gold shouted, limping behind her as quickly as he was able.

"Two weeks? She's been this close for TWO WEEKS and you couldn't even bother to tell me?" Emma screamed.

"Emma – we had to make sure." Mrs. Potts said, now entering the room. "We don't want to make another mistake."

"You mean you don't want ME to make another mistake! I'm sorry, alright! I got a little anxious last time but dammit, that's my kid that she's got!" Emma shouted. Belle looked up at Gold, a look of surprise on her face.

"You – you have a child?" Belle asked, surprised, as she turned to Emma. Emma nodded, trying not to cry.

"Emma – I'll be leaving tomorrow, let me handle this." Mrs. Potts said, putting her arm around Emma. "We will get your son back. I promise. Now I'm going to go make dinner for everyone, we can all sit down and eat together for once." Mrs. Potts left the room.

"I have to make a few more quick calls – make sure everything is set." Gold said, and he went back into the hidden room. Emma paced nervously as Belle watched her.

"You um – you can have a seat." Belle said. Emma turned and looked at her, then sat down. "So – how old is your son?"

"He just turned ten." Emma said.

"What's his name?" Belle asked.

"Henry." Emma replied.

"And Regina Mills has him?" Belle asked. Emma nodded her head yes. "I'm sorry." Belle said, putting her hand on Emma's arm. "Do you have any pictures of him?"

"Yeah." Emma replied. She reached into her pocket and pulled out a small billfold. "I'm sorry, I can usually keep it together pretty well, but – he's been gone for a year now and -"

"It's okay." Belle said as Emma handed her a small photo. Belle looked at the picture and smiled. "Oh, he's handsome. You know what, he – he kind of looks like Ian, don't you think?"

"That's not possible." Emma said.

"Well, look at him, his nose and his chin, they're very similar. I mean, Ian hasn't shown me any pictures of himself as a child, but – there is a resemblance there." Belle stated.

"Well, it's just a coincidence." Emma said, taking the photo back. "I'm not related to Gold, and Henry's father is – well, not in the picture. Never has been."

"I'm sorry." Belle said. "He didn't want children?"

"He didn't know. Took off before I even knew, and – well, I just never bothered to find him." Emma said.

"You could, you know. I mean with what you do for a living, you could probably find him quite easily." Belle said.

"Not interested." Emma said. "Henry's MY kid – nobody else's." Gold came back out into the study.

"Everything's set. Gwen has things under control – try to restrain from disrupting everything this time." Gold said. Emma glared at him.

"Yes sir." Emma spat at him, and she stomped out of the room. Gold sat down next to Belle.

"She tell you about Henry, then?" Gold asked.

"Yes. She showed me a picture. He looks a bit like you." Belle said. A look of surprise came over Gold's face.

"You think so? I never noticed." Gold said.

"His nose and his chin – very prominent, just like you." Belle said.

"Well, let's hope the lad fares better than I did once puberty sets in." Gold said.

"Stop it. You're a very handsome man, Ian, I wish you could see that." Belle said.

"Never felt handsome. At least no one ever made me feel that way. Not until you." Gold said. Belle kissed him.

"You are very handsome. I thought so from the first day I came here." Belle said.

"You said you thought I was a beast. Oh, and an arrogant, overbearing ass." Gold said.

"Well, yes, but – you were still handsome." Belle said, smiling at him. "And that was just a first impression and those don't always count. You can't tell what's in a person heart until you truly know them."

"Well, I'm glad I got to know you." Gold said, and he kissed her once again. "After dinner, maybe we can take another one of those walks. I'd like to try and go a bit further this time."

"Really?" Belle asked.

"You're right, Belle - I have to be ready to move forward with my life. And if all goes the way that I'm confident it will – that will be sooner rather than later. I was up for a bit last night after we went back to bed, and I was thinking – I've put off planning for the future for twenty years, because I didn't believe I had one. But now I do believe that I can have one. The thing is – there's only one future that I'm interested in." Gold said.

"And – what's that?" Belle asked.

"The one where you and I are together." Gold replied. Belle smiled at him and he pulled her into a deep kiss.

* * *

_Twenty one years ago . . . . . . _

_It had been nearly six months since Gold obtained full physical custody of his son. He and Bae were adjusting quite well to their new life, and Bae was even improving in school, maintaining a B average overall. Gold signed him up for various children's activities at the Smithsonian, which Bae thoroughly enjoyed. Bae visited Milah for two weeks during the summer, and was scheduled to spend the Thanksgiving holiday with her. _

_Gold's divorce proceedings went along much smoother and quicker than he expected. He thoroughly anticipated a fight from Milah for custody, among other things, but she surprisingly indicated that she was satisfied with their current arrangement. Gold was suspicious that she was up to something, but he had Bae so he put those thoughts aside – for the moment. Since Milah was the one with all of the money when they entered into their marriage, Gold had signed a pre-nup, and per its requirements, he only retained that which he brought into the marriage, which was fine with him. He wanted nothing more from Milah and remained civil with her for Bae's sake. Milah provided an amount of child support for Bae that the courts ordered, but Gold was capable of providing for the boy on his own, so he set up the money in a college trust for Bae. The two of them were extremely content in their new life. _

_In addition, Gold decided to take Regina Mills under his wing and mentor her as she entered her first year of training in the CIA. Her boyfriend Daniel had given enough evidence to arrest his boss, a mob kingpin named Albert Spencer that the feds had been trying to put behind bars for years. Gold was able to arrange a deal of clemency for the young man in exchange for his testimony. _

_Regina Mills proved to be an excellent student. Gold knew she had potential and the more he worked with her, he could see the makings of a fantastic agent. She was quite shrewd, and smart, and he was certainly glad that she was on his side because he realized quickly that she would be a formidable opponent to anyone who crossed her. _

_One autumn afternoon, Regina strolled into Gold's office, beaming happily. "Good morning." she said with a happy lilt in her voice._

"_Well – what has you so chipper today?" Gold asked. Regina held out her left hand._

"_Only this." Regina said excitedly. "Daniel asked me to marry him last night." Gold just nodded, but didn't say a word. "Well aren't you going to congratulate me?"_

"_Congratulations." Gold said. "Get a pre-nup – it saves a lot of hassle when the divorce proceedings begin."_

"_Just because your marriage tanked doesn't mean mine will." Regina said._

"_I was the same age as you when I married my now ex-wife. Trust me – in ten years, you'll feel very differently about marriage." Gold insisted. _

"_You just didn't marry the right person. She wasn't your true love." Regina said. _

"_And Daniel is yours?" Gold asked._

"_Of course he is. I wouldn't marry him if he wasn't." Regina said. "I knew he was my true love within the first week I knew him." Gold chuckled a bit. _

"_Really, dearie? That quickly? How on earth could you know it that soon?" Gold asked, curious._

"_Well I didn't KNOW that I knew it, but – looking back, it's pretty clear. He's really anxious for the trial to start, he wants to go back to school." Regina said. _

"_It'll be soon enough. And you want my advice? Give it another year before you marry him, and for god's sake, don't get pregnant." Gold said._

"_We're not that stupid." Regina spat at him. _

"_Yes, and I suppose I was then?" Gold asked. _

"_Yeah, you were. Like I said – you didn't wait for your true love, you just jumped into bed with the first pretty girl that looked twice at you and knocked her up." Regina sniped. Gold sighed in disgust. "Did I hit a nerve?"_

"_You're getting on my last one. Keep in mind that you're just a trainee and I am your superior when you make judgments about my life as if you have any right to." Gold said. _

"_You've still got time, you know." Regina said._

"_For what?" Gold asked._

"_To find your true love." Regina said. "I bet she's out there somewhere."_

"_I think not. Even if I believed there were such a thing – which I don't – I seriously doubt that is in the cards for me." Gold said. "Now are we going to get some work done or are we going to debate about the existence of this myth of true love that you're so fond of?"_

"_It's not a myth. It's real. You'll know it when you find it. It'll be like they – like the part of you that always seemed to be missing was suddenly there and – well, you just know that you can't live without it. If anything ever happened to Daniel, I think – I honestly think I'd just lose my mind."_

* * *

"You doing alright?" Belle asked as she and Gold walked hand in hand along the driveway.

"Yeah." Gold replied quietly. They had walked a bit further than the day before. Gold appeared nervous but a bit less nervous this time, and less pale, Belle observed.

"These grounds were beautiful at one time, weren't they? Why didn't you keep them up?" Belle asked.

"What was the point?" Gold replied. "Besides – this look keeps people away." Gold looked up and saw the gates to the estate ahead of him, and he stopped. "I think that's far enough for today."

"We're almost at the gate." Belle said.

"I know. I'm just – not ready to go there yet." Gold said. "Maybe next time."

"I can't wait until this is all over and we can go into town and show those horrible people how wrong they were about you." Belle said.

"Belle – there are still things I haven't told you. Things I've been afraid to tell you because – because I might lose you if I tell you these things, and I don't think I could bear that." Gold said.

"Ian, I already told you, you can tell me anything. It can't be that bad." Belle said. Gold just sighed and didn't respond as they made their way back into the house. "Here – let me take your coat." Belle said as she helped Gold take his coat off. She then took off her own jacket, then turned to him and smiled.

"Do you want to sit down and talk?" Belle asked. Gold nodded. He took her hand and led her upstairs and into Bae's room. Gold motioned for Belle to sit down on the bed. He walked toward the closet, opened it, and rummaged through it until he found a framed photo. He brought it over to Belle and showed it to her. It was posed holiday portrait of himself with Bae.

"This was the last Christmas photo I took with Bae. Actually – it was the last photo I took with him. Haven't looked at it in years." Gold said, his eyes welling up with tears.

"You both look very happy." Belle commented, taking his hand and squeezing it tightly.

"We were. Everything was going so well. He had just visited his mother, had a really nice visit with her. We had a lovely Christmas together, just Bae and I, and Gwen was there too. And then – I made one mistake. One mistake that caused my entire world to spiral out of control. And as a result – well, then **I** spiraled out of control." Gold told her, his voice trembling. "Regina Mills – she was studying with me at the agency. I was – I was her mentor. I saw quite a bit of potential in her – but she had this boyfriend. A young man that she was seeing named Daniel. He was a courier for a notorious organized crime outfit that the feds had been trying to bring down for decades. She convinced him to turn states evidence against the band's ringleader. Unfortunately – the man who ran the syndicate, Albert Spencer, he – he had quite a few more judges in his pocket than I had anticipated. I made a bad call, and - they let him off on a technicality. The feds didn't feel that the young man was in any imminent danger. They refused to offer him protection. Regina begged me to help, but – there wasn't much I could offer, aside from a bit of money, and I had to be careful at that. I wasn't on active duty any longer but I still worked for the CIA, and going up against a tyrant like Spencer – well, I had my boy to consider as well, I certainly wasn't going to put Bae at risk."

"Several weeks after Spencer was released – Daniel disappeared. His body was found a month later. It was clearly a mob hit, I've seen enough of them, but, not surprisingly, there was not enough evidence to prove it. Regina – blamed me."

"But it wasn't your fault. How could she blame you?" Belle asked.

"Regina had an extremely naïve outlook on the world when I first encountered her. I did my best to make her see things in a more practical manner, but – it took this sort of tragedy to make her really understand the reality of all that I had been teaching her. I guess she just – snapped somehow. So here was this young girl, with training courtesy of me, knowledge of the inner workings of the CIA, courtesy of me, now full of hate and anger and vengeance. Not a combination that goes well with anything. She was impulsive, reckless – she went after Spencer first. Took him out personally." Gold said.

"She killed him?" Belle asked, shocked.

"Oh, yes. She didn't think about the ramifications of what would happen to her because I really don't think she cared – she was on a suicide mission. But once she got away with something that the feds couldn't accomplish in decades – it gave her a taste of power. Several of Spencer's former lackeys, they – went to work for her. She took over his territory, and several others. It was surreal – this young girl becoming one of the most powerful leaders in organized crime. And thanks to my training – she was very good at covering her tracks. Still is."

"Then there was her vendetta against me." Gold said. "She still blamed me for what happened to Daniel. I was her main target. And she knew exactly how to get to me – through my son."

* * *

**A/N: I really can't thank all of my readers enough for their support! If you are reading this or any of my other fics, and you're on Tumblr, I'd really appreciate your support for the Espenson Awards. I have details on my blog - you can find me as charmedrumbelle on Tumblr. I know I'm a fairly new Rumbelle fic writer but if you like my stories and would be willing to nominate any of them for the Espeson Awards on Tumblr (nominations begin on January 10) I'd greatly appreciate it! I'd also appreciate any fic recs on Tumblr as well to get my stories out there to more people. Thank you so very much! :)**


	20. Chapter 20

_WOW, had lots of feedback the last chapter! Thank you so much! This chapter is angsty - I know some of you miss the fluff but I want to move this along so . . . also I'm staying with the narrative format for this chapter instead of flashbacks. MAJOR stuff in this one - I appreciate your feedback, thank you all for reading!_

**_Chapter 20_**

Belle awoke the next morning and looked over at the clock – to her surprise, it was almost noon. She yawned and stretched a bit, surprised at how late she had slept. She and Gold were up quite late talking. They began their conversation in Bae's room, and later moved to the bedroom where he continued to tell her about his unfortunate past with Regina Mills.

Gold told her about the day that he went to pick up Bae from school, and he wasn't there. He spoke of how panicked he was and how worried he was that Regina may have taken him. His worry ended up being for naught; there was simply a miscommunication between himself and Mrs. Potts, and she had gone to retrieve the boy thinking that it was her day to do so, as she had frequently helped Gold with his son.

After that day, Gold hired a private security guard to watch over Bae – better to be safe than sorry, he thought. He knew that Regina was planning something; he just didn't know what. He just knew that it was coming. He told Belle how he became nervous and paranoid at every turn. Which, in retrospect was exactly what Regina wanted. She wanted him to be a wreck over the prospect of losing his son – just as she was when Daniel's safety was in jeopardy.

The longer this went on, the less he could keep the situation under wraps from Milah, who was due for another week's visit in the spring. He would have to tell her about the security, and about the concern for the boy's safety. He knew that she would be angry, and blame him no doubt, but he expected her to comply.

What Gold didn't expect was for Milah to use this against him and file a petition for full custody of Bae. She had already lost custody and he was certain that she wouldn't want to go through that sort of thing again. But this time she was the one prepared. Gold's connection with Regina Mills, who at that point had become quite infamous in the world of organized crime, coupled with his paranoia and concern for Bae's safety was a detriment to his case. Milah ended up with primary physical custody, and Gold had visitation every other weekend. Their roles had reversed.

It was at this point in the story that Belle must have drifted off to sleep, because that was the last thing she remembered Gold telling her. Belle climbed out of bed and made her way out of the room. She peeked into the study and saw Gold sitting at his spinning wheel working.

"Hey." Gold said, looking up at her. "You slept quite late."

"Guess I was tired. Sorry I fell asleep on you last night." Belle said as she made her way to his side. She stood behind Gold and kissed him on the cheek.

"It's alright. Sorry I kept you up so late. I've only been up for about an hour and a half myself." Gold said.

"Not working today?" Belle asked.

"Just waiting. Gwen is in Boston staking out Regina's place. Once she has the mapping done she'll get it to me and we can figure out the best way in." Gold said.

"Isn't that dangerous?" Belle asked.

"We're spies, love. It's part of the job." Gold said. "Emma, understandably, wants to handle this one herself."

"I hope she gets her son back." Belle said.

"Yes, so do I. I'm quite fond of that lad. Henry's a good boy." Gold said. "Reminds me of my Bae sometimes." Belle gave him another quick kiss on the top of his head.

"I'm going to go get a shower and get lunch ready. Do you want today's usual?" Belle asked.

"How about you surprise me today." Gold said.

"Are you going to finish telling me about what happened with Bae?" Belle asked. Gold sighed and leaned against Belle.

"I suppose I have to." Gold said.

"Ian – whatever it is – it won't change anything." Belle said. She gave him a hug and left the room. Gold watched her as she left.

"Oh, but it will. It most definitely will." Gold said out loud to himself.

* * *

Regina Mills entered the young boy's room carrying a tray. "Guess what I have? Hot fudge sundae, your favorite." Regina said, setting the tray in front of him.

"Cool!" Henry said excitedly, and he reached for the sundae and started eating.

"You have your homework done?" Regina asked. Henry nodded. "Can I see it?" Regina asked as she sat down on the edge of his bed. Henry handed her some papers and Regina looked them over. "Looks good. Your mom's going to be very proud of you, Henry, how well you've kept up with your schoolwork."

"How much longer do I have to stay here?" Henry asked.

"I'm not sure." Regina said. "It's still not safe. Your mom will let me know when it's time."

"Are you gonna come with us? I mean – when it's safe. My mom will protect you." Henry said.

"We'll see." Regina told him. "I have an important meeting downstairs – I need you to stay up here tonight, okay? Why don't you get ready for bed, and I'll see you in the morning."

"Okay. Goodnight Regina." Henry said.

"Goodnight, Henry." Regina said, and she gave the boy a hug. Regina made her way downstairs – the man waiting in the living room paced nervously. He was tall with dark hair, stubble, and a brooding look about him.

"You're sure she didn't see me come in?" Jones asked.

"Please. If there's one thing I've learned in twenty years, it's how to outsmart a nosy agent." Regina said. "Don't worry, she's not going to report anything back to him."

"Good. Do you have my money?" Jones asked. Regina walked over to her desk and opened a drawer. She took out an envelope and handed it to Jones.

"You get the rest when it's done." Regina said. "She drives a yellow bug, she's always in and out of the property, she shouldn't be that hard to find."

"What are you going to tell the boy?" Jones asked.

"Well – he understands that his mother is in a – dangerous field. Accidents happen." Regina said.

"I thought all of this was to get to Gold. You weren't supposed to get attached to the lad." Jones said.

"You don't get paid to give your opinion. You get paid to do your job. So shut up and do your job, and actually do it right this time." Regina said.

"I want Ian Gold dead. You promised me THAT was the ultimate goal." Jones said.

"In time. Just be patient." Regina said. "Gold will get what's coming to him. And I'll get Henry. Everything will work out just the way it's supposed to."

* * *

"So – what happened next?" Belle asked as they made their way back up to the study after finishing lunch.

"I, um – I quit my job. I mean – at the agency. I wasn't going to be away from Bae, not with Milah carrying on with that degenerate pirate." Gold said, and they sat down on the sofa.

"He had a boat, that doesn't make him a pirate." Belle said.

"He had all sorts of illegal goings-on down at that shipyard, he's the very definition of a pirate, at least by modern standards." Gold said. "Anyhow, I moved back to Storybrooke. Went back into surveillance, got a place in town, had all of my equipment set up there. I saw Bae whenever I could and continued to try and find a way to get him back from Milah. He hated living with her. He didn't like Jones one bit. But apparently, Milah convinced some fool judge that I had used some sort of CIA brainwashing tactic to poison him against her, and she needed time to help him adjust."

"Is there such a thing?" Belle asked.

"Can't tell you that, love. But if there were, I certainly wouldn't do that to my own child. Bae saw Milah for what she was – she couldn't stand that. She got it in her head that a vacation with the boy would be good for them. Jones had suggested the get on his boat and set said for Ireland. As if I would let that happen." Gold said. "I didn't give a damn what the courts said – there was no way in hell I was letting that woman and her lover run off with my son. I was going to do whatever it took to see to it that would never happen. So I -"

Gold stopped himself, his voice trembling.

"Ian – you can tell me." Belle said, taking his hand. Gold pulled away from her – he got up and walked over to the place where he hid his alcohol. "Ian, please – you promised no more of that, no more drinking." Gold opened the hidden compartment – it was empty.

"Dammit!" Gold screaming, slamming it shut. Belle stood up and walked over to him, wrapping her arms around him.

"I think Gwen got rid of it all." Belle said. "Come on – sit down. You need to tell me this." Belle took his hand and led him back to the sofa. Gold didn't look at her.

"Belle, if I tell you this, you'll never look at me the same again. You'll see what I monster I am." Gold said.

"Ian – you have to tell me. If we're going to have any kind of future together then whatever this is – I need to know." Belle said. Gold sighed.

"There was this little weasel of a man that worked at the shipyard with Jones. His name was William Smee. Grifter, con man, he'd sell his own mother for the right price. And he – like many people – never much cared for Milah. I heard through local gossip that he'd been wanting to make a move away from Storybrooke but he was strapped for cash. So I – offered him a deal. I'd give him a one-way ticket to wherever he liked and enough money to set up a new life for himself – if he'd do me one favor. Milah went to that foul shipyard every day at the same time to visit Jones. All that Smee had to do was – Belle please don't make me tell you this." Gold said, his voice trembling once again.

"Ian – it's alright. I'm right here." Belle said, squeezing his hand.

"I had to get rid of her, Belle. It was the only way I was going to have Bae, if she was gone. Jones had plenty of enemies, and if it happened at his shipyard then he would certainly be blamed." Gold paused for a moment. "It was just a little device Smee had to place in her car, that's all."

"Ian – you didn't -" Belle began.

"I don't know what I was thinking, Belle. Between my paranoia over Regina and everything with Bae I just – I think I started losing my mind a bit at that point, I just wanted her gone. I wasn't thinking clearly, I was sloppy about it. It was a – it was a cowardly thing to do. And Bae was supposed to be home. He never went with her to the shipyard, she didn't want him there when she was with Jones." Belle began to cry as she listened to him. "He wasn't supposed to be there, Belle. It was just supposed to be Milah – she would get in the car, and the device would go off, and Bae wasn't supposed to be with her." Gold began to sob as Belle took him into her arms. "He's gone, Belle. My boy, my beautiful boy, he's gone and it's all my fault." Belle was quiet for several minutes; she simply held Gold close and rocked him in her arms. After about five minutes went by, Belle let him go. She cupped his chin in her hand and he looked up at her.

"How can you even look at me after what I just told you?" Gold asked.

"Because I think – I think if Bae were here – he'd forgive you. Given the circumstance, and all that Milah put you through - how could I not do the same?" Belle said. "Now you just need to find a way to forgive yourself. You've punished yourself for twenty years. That's long enough."

"I don't deserve you." Gold said.

"Doesn't matter – you still have me." Belle said, and she hugged him tightly.

"There's more, Belle. There's more you need to know about me - after it happened." Gold said. Belle put her fingers up to his lips.

"You've told me enough today. We can finish later. If that was the worst of it, which I think it was – as long as you're honest with me – we'll be fine." Belle said. "I do think that – you need to find another – professional to talk to. But we'll worry about that later, as long as you promise me you'll do that." Gold nodded in agreement. "Do you know what would be nice? How about we go for a ride tonight?"

"A ride? Belle, we can't go for a ride, you can't go out there." Gold said.

"Just around the block, it'll be good for you." Belle said.

"You're trying to distract me so that I stop thinking about what I just told you." Gold said.

"You got that, did you?" Belle said.

"I'm a CIA agent love, you'll have to try harder to get anything past me." Gold said. "Belle, I haven't been in a car in nearly twenty years. I wouldn't even know how to drive one of these newer models."

"I'll drive." Belle said.

"How do you not – need time to process all of this? Belle, I killed my ex-wife – deliberately. Most women find out their boyfriend did a thing like that and they run screaming out the door." Gold said.

"Well, as I've said before – I'm not most women. And to be honest – I've suspected it was something like that ever since you told me there was an accident and that you blamed yourself. You're not the only one who picks up on things." Belle said.

"After all that I've told you – after everything you've learned about me, after everything I've done – why haven't you given up on me?" Gold asked.

"Well, I learned a long time ago – when you find something that's worth fighting for – you never give up. You're worth fighting for." Belle said, and she touched his cheek gently.

"Regina once told me that my biggest mistake in life was the fact that I didn't wait for my true love. She was always waxing poetic about Daniel, how he was her entire world and she would be lost without him, and she told me that my true love was still out there somewhere. I scoffed at the idea – it was nothing but a ridiculous fairy tale as far as I was concerned. But I think I understand now – because I look at you and I think, if I ever lost you, I'd become as mad as she did. I can't even fathom not having you in my life. I'd be lost without you, Belle." Gold said.

"I'm not going anywhere. Except for a ride around the block with you." Belle said, smiling at him.

"Alright." Gold said. "I just need to let security know so that they can follow us."

"Follow you where?" Emma asked, entering the room from the hidden door.

"We're going for a ride around the block." Belle said.

"With him? How drunk are you gonna get him to make him do that?" Emma asked.

"I haven't had a drink in some time, Miss Swan, nor do I intend to, because I have no need for it. I have Belle." Gold said. Emma rolled her eyes.

"Spare me the sappy, romantic crap. You're not going anywhere. Gwen just called me, she's got the specs, she needs us to be online with her in thirty minutes." Emma said. "If all goes well – I'll have my son back in a matter of days."

"Well, we don't need that much time, come on Belle, let's go." Gold said, and he stood up and took her hand. Emma sighed.

"I'm going with you." Emma said.

"You can follow behind in your car, we want privacy." Gold said.

"For what? I've seen you have panic attacks before, this one should be a doozy, I don't want to miss it." Emma said.

"He won't have a panic attack, he'll be fine." Belle insisted. "Ian has been working very hard on his – issues. He wants to have a life after all of this is over, this is just another small step toward that."

"Alright, fine. I'll follow behind you." Emma said, grumbling as she walked away.

* * *

Belle and Gold drove down the long driveway, with Emma following closely behind. When they reached the gate, Belle stopped the car. "You alright?" Belle asked, taking his hand.

"Yeah. We're not going far, right?" Gold said, still sounding a bit nervous.

"Not far at all." Belle said. "You're doing so well. You're going to be alright. When all of this is over – you're going to be alright." Belle reached over and kissed him. Emma honked her car horn at them. They pulled away from one another and laughed a bit.

"She's not a big fan of romance." Gold said.

"I think once she has her boy back, we need to find someone for her." Belle said. "If you found someone, there certainly has to be a true love out there for Emma Swan."

"If anyone can find him, I'm sure it'll be you." Gold said. Emma honked her car horn at them again. "You do know that she has a gun on her, right? You'd better go or she just might use it." Belle laughed a bit, and she reached for the remote to open the gate. As soon as the gate opened, she put the car in drive. It sputtered for a moment, then stopped altogether.

"Oh, come on!" Belle said. She tried to start the car again, but it wouldn't budge. Belle sighed. She got of the car, and Emma did the same.

"Well, there's a sign, this was a stupid idea, get in my car and I'll drive you back up to the house." Emma said.

"Well, we can still go for a ride, we'll just use your car." Belle said.

"MY car? I'm not chauffeuring the two of you around." Emma said.

"You don't have to chauffer us, I can drive it, it's just around the block." Belle said. "You can sit in the back. Emma, please – Ian has had a very rough day, he needs this. He's getting better and little things like this may not seem like much to you but they are helping and it's all I can do for him right now until this whole mess is over. I know you have your issues with him but please just let him have this." Emma sighed in disgust.

"Fine. Down the street, make a u-turn, and back, that's IT." Emma said. Belle smiled at her. "Get him out of the car, I'll pull out to the curb." Belle walked over to Ian's side of the car and opened the door.

"We're going in Emma's car, come on." Belle said.

"Belle, I really think we should just go back, I'm getting nervous." Gold said.

"You're fine." Belle said, taking his hand and helping him out of the car. "We've gotten this far, right? And we're not even going round the block, just up the road and back. Come on." Gold reluctantly followed her. Emma had already climbed into the back seat of the little yellow bug as Gold and Belle walked toward it. "You ready?" Belle asked.

"No." Gold said.

"You're alright. Nothing to be afraid of." Belle said. She pulled Gold into a hug, her back facing the street. Neither of them noticed the car coming down the road, nor did they notice it slowing down as it approached. They didn't notice until they heard the gunshot, and Belle collapsed in Gold's arms.


End file.
